I met my now ex girlfriend/fiancee about a year ago and things were going great for ages (you know, met my family etc, got engaged, had everything going for us) I've always known she wanted to get back in touch with old mates she had lost contact with and I was cool with that. About a year down the line we got engaged, a month later she said she didnt want to be with me and thought it would be best to spend some time apart. She lives with her parents and I lived in my own property. I would have done anything for her and she hasnt really given me a legitamate reason for leaving other than "it didnt feel right" (please bear in mind that she suggested getting married in the first place and was really excited and started planning etc.) how could her mind have changed so quickly? was she cheating??
2007-03-27 12:20:02 · 11 answers · asked by kentgeeza26 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds like she has a new squeeze! let her go and forget her. you sound very intelligent, so you shouldn't have any trouble finding Ms Right.
2007-03-27 12:25:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's difficult to say if she has been cheating on you. From your explanation, there is nothing to suggest infidelity.
She could have changed her mind for any number of reasons:
- Doubt: Maybe she's not just sure about the marriage thing anymore. Maybe she made the suggestion in the first place on the spur of the moment.
- Fear: Marriage is a "biggy", you know. She may have felt that the time was not right.
To be honest, the only way you are going to find out the truth is to have a frank chat with her. Try to see things from her point of view. It will be hard in the short term because of your own hurt, but it is the best long-term solution.
Prepare yourself to be disappointed. She may tell you that she has met someone else or that she does not think that you are the right man for her. If it comes to that make a decision to move on for good.
Calling off the engagement may have saved you a lifetime of heartache. What if she started having doubts (or cheating) after you were married and had kids? Good luck.
2007-03-27 17:34:50 · answer #2 · answered by Taharqa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what you've said, there is no reason to think she was cheating on you. Maybe actually getting engaged made her think more about the relationship and it scared her or made her realise you weren't right for each other? Maybe she is just really confused? Maybe it hasn't felt right for a while, and she thought getting engaged would fix it, but it didn't? Maybe she didn't want to hurt your feelings, so hasn't made it clear how she has ended up feeling the way she does now?
Have you tried talking to her since to see if she can explain what has happened? If you have and she's not giving you any more information, I think the best thing is just to leave it be and get on with your own life.
2007-03-27 13:03:40 · answer #3 · answered by Sneetch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that she was cheating, it just sounds like things moved at the speed of light and she found herself commiting to a relationship that she was not ready for. I am sure you are devasted and whilst I think she should have thought things through before getting engaged I do think that your split was probably for the best longterm.
good luck for the future, you sound really nice so I am sure that you will find the right person one day soon.
2007-03-27 13:04:18 · answer #4 · answered by cathyjast 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably hasn't been cheating as such, but maybe she's starting to wonder if she likes someone else. Maybe it's not anyone in particular, but she feels drawn to other men in general. Perhaps she realises that, after the initial excitement felt at the beginning of your relationship, (happens to us all- we jump in with both feet) she actually isn't ready to settle down.
If that's the case then sorry, mate, but better this happen now than later, isn't it? You'll be OK whatever happens. Just keep your chin up and do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. Best of luck to you.
2007-03-27 16:02:00 · answer #5 · answered by Phil K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How vain some guys are, you can't accept that she doesn't want to be with you for obviously a very good reason to her, yet you sit there assuming she must have been cheating on you. jeez. no wonder she left you.
She obviously came to her senses that's all.
2007-03-27 12:28:30 · answer #6 · answered by Angel Eyes 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No I dont think she was cheating just maybe got cold feet!!! its a big commitment
2007-03-27 12:27:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Mayb eshe wanted to dump you before she cheated .. so she could be free to get on with whatever... girls do that...
Dr bad
2007-03-27 13:49:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldnt say she was cheating on you. you have no proof of that. maybe she decided she wasnt ready to be married yet. it happens sometimes ya know.
2007-03-27 12:27:39 · answer #9 · answered by zsaffireblue2003 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
she's bored, that's all it is......everythings happened too fast and now she's waking up to the reality of things......leave her alone and get on with your life...coz thats all she wants to do....let it go
2007-03-27 13:40:41 · answer #10 · answered by Dazzlebox 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋