my ex is having another kid by another woman a year affter we broke up. They are also broken up now. He had cheated on me with her so there were hard feelings there though now i thank her for opening my eyes. well today i called her mother and asked her to tell this girl that if she wanted my son's old crib and other furniture to call me. i was scared to death because i said alot of hurtfull stuff to her but i know that our ex in common will not help her he even said he didn't see why he should buy this stuff...i just felt bad and wanted to help...did i do wrong where we both had hard feelings?
2007-03-27 11:58:52 · 16 answers · asked by Gypsy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
No you didn't do the wrong by offering her stuff. Afterall no matter what this child is going to be your child's sibling and it's worth it to try and work things out between the both of you for their sakes. And she might just see where you are coming from now that she see's the other side of this man. I have been in this situation myself and my daughter's younger sister's mom and I look out for each other - and she is seeing what it is like to walk in my shoes. Team up and work together. Good luck.
2007-03-27 12:06:13 · answer #1 · answered by Aimee P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is great of you to do something like that after all that happened! I know it is hard to get over things like that. It just makes you a bigger person to 'forgive and forget'. Just let her know that you are sorry for the things you did or said and you are there if she needs anything (if you want to go that far). I wouldn't get to friendly though. Just doing that should make you feel better... If she doesn't want the help or doesn't return the 'niceness' then it goes to show that you are more mature and you are better off staying away from people like that. Don't feel bad about feeling compassion for other people, whether you like them or not.
2007-03-27 12:12:33 · answer #2 · answered by GibsonGirlz4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that was very thoughtful of you. You can't help how you felt when things first happened. It must have taken a lot of strength and forgiveness for you to have come so far. It's a shame that this guy has now left you both in a difficult situation, but its good to see that you are willing to help someone in need. I give you all the praise in the world. Kudos!
2007-03-27 13:50:47 · answer #3 · answered by terasa425 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you didn't do wrong. You are being the better person by reaching out to her. If she wants the crib and furniture she will call you, if she doesn't or tells you off, oh well you did your best. Good for you!
2007-03-27 12:05:14 · answer #4 · answered by SAChicky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How could you think you did anything wrong? You opened up and reached out to her by offering to help her because you understood the position she is in. What happened beforeis history, you both were in totally different places. She is now in that place you were and you have offered a precious gift of kindness. No matter what she decides to do, you opened your heart and that is never wrong.
2007-03-27 12:11:02 · answer #5 · answered by Margaret K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can'tbe wrong for having any sort of bad feelings. THings were said out of anger, as it usually goes that way in a heated situation like that. It's a nice gesture to be the bigger adult and step up and offer help! I'm sure it will come as much appreciated by the new mother.
2007-03-27 12:04:52 · answer #6 · answered by Dizzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You definitely did the right thing! You will probably be surprised how much the two of you will be able to bond over this shared experience...you might even find yourselves becoming good friends!
One of my best friends is a woman who was the "other woman" when I was dating my college boyfriend.
2007-03-27 12:10:14 · answer #7 · answered by western b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's awesome! Good for you. It took a strong woman to reach out the way you did. Obviously you have learned your lesson, moved on, and have forgiven. You didn't do wrong...you did very right! You go girl!!!
2007-03-27 12:04:39 · answer #8 · answered by Wendy B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was a very caring and generous thing you did. You reached out to another human being who was in as much pain as you were at one time. If it turns out she is not ready to accept your generosity then move on and don't be hurt by it, you did your best.
2007-03-27 12:03:45 · answer #9 · answered by ZenWoman 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It was nice that you wanted to help but I think you need to stay clear of that situation. It sounds like your ex needs to "man up" and buy HIS kid the stuff he/she is going to need. Save it for yourself if you are going to have other kids but if not give it to someone who needs it more.
2007-03-27 12:07:18 · answer #10 · answered by Jade 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋