My girlfriend has a very strong idea that I plan to propose sometime in the near future (she found my diamond notes), and today we were walking around on our lunchbreak. Passed by a Tiffany's, she said you mind if we take a look? She didn't say anything specific inside the store other than "oh that's sparkley"
My question is, should we go engagement ring shopping together or should I surprize her? How can I find out which she would prefer without blowing the surprize?
2007-03-27 10:51:06 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
First of all, congratulations!
It sounds like you've done your homework if you have diamond notes. Good for you - it pays to be educated about stones and what they are worth.
First question; in general, is she a practical woman who gets a kick out of making plans and arranging events, clothing, etc? You may know her better than anyone. Is she the sort who would value a chance to do this together with you over the delight of the dramatic opening of the little velvet box? Have you surprised her with goodies in the past and gotten a good reaction?
Her casual stop by the jewelry counter may have been her way of letting you know that she is open to a proposal and you can expect a Yes if you propose. NO ONE goes jewelry shopping at Tiffany with their sweetie unless they are ready to take the plunge!
If you decide to surprise her, you can choose something she'll love and really delight her, but you will have to be a wee bit sneaky and keep a sharp eye. You are talking about something she will be wearing every day, so you want to make sure she loves it.
Two ideas. You can even do both things rather than just one. Get her mother, sister or her best girlfriend to propose a shopping trip just the two of them to look at jewelry "just for fun" and have the friend/sister pay specially close attention to the things your sweetie seems drawn to. Have them take notes and report back to you. If there's one in particular she's crazy about it will be clear; if not, then at least the friend will be able to let you know which styles she seemed to lean toward and this increases your chances of making a favorable choice. And one thing the friend/relative needs to do if at all possible is to get her ring size!!
Second, you two go shopping yourselves, to look but not to buy. (Do this only if you are dead certain you want to propose or there will be fallout if you change your mind!) Point out rings you like and say, "I like this one because of the marquise cut" or whatever. Ask her if she likes it too or if she sees one she thinks is prettier. Hopefully she'll offer more hints than "oh, that's sparkly!" You may even playfully ask her if she wants to try one on. Sometimes rings look a lot better shown off on the hand than in the case. Sneak back later and make the purchase.
These two things together ought to give you enough of an idea of at least what style she likes that you can confidently choose something she'll like. This way, you can go shopping together AND you can surprise her.
Be open to the possibility that she had something particular in mind and despite your best efforts she'd rather change it out - be good natured and willing to do that for her -- and then, yes, you get the fun of a shopping trip together. Be sure she is aware of your budget so she doesn't fall in love with something that is $15,000 if your budget only allows $1500.
Good luck and happy landings!
2007-03-27 11:26:56 · answer #1 · answered by Parrot Eyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think she would love to be surprised? If so, then go to the jewelry store with her and watch what hits her eye, and maybe you can get an idea. Then pick out a georgeous diamond ring, maybe a marquis shape, a square cut diamond, a pear shape, there are so many types. See what size she asks for. Then when you get the ring, take her out to a special candlelight dinner and pop the question and when she goes to the ladies room, put the ring on her dessert dish and there is your perfect surprise. Say I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you and will you marry me? And that my dear man is what love is all about.
2007-03-27 19:33:52 · answer #2 · answered by cardgirl2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can do both. My fiance did. We went engagement ring shopping together--I tried on a lot of different styles and found what I wanted (which was totally different from what I thought I wanted). Then, I left it up to him to buy the ring and propose when he thought it was right. That way, I got the jewelry I loved (remember, she'll wear this for the rest of her life) and I got a surprise engagement! (He did it about 2-3 months after we went ring shopping.)
She won't know anything about the proposal and how you plan to do it. All she will know is what her ring may look like! Don't buy it when she's there, just try on some rings together.
Congrats on your impending engagement!
2007-03-27 17:57:41 · answer #3 · answered by ms. teacher ft 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We like to think that we know EXACTLY what the other person likes. But if that were the case, the 'returns' line at the malls after Christmas would be vacant.
I get questions from girls all the time asking how they can tell their boyfriend they don't like the ring he chose, without hurting his feelings. Can't be done.
Call your jeweler, tell him your price range & let him pull all those priced rings. Propose with a ring (if you have to have one) from a bubble gum machine. Then go shopping. That way you BOTh get to share this experience, you BOTH pick it out & you're BOTH happy. It's a win-win situation all the way around.
2007-03-27 18:06:34 · answer #4 · answered by weddrev 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
BOTH!
You can surprise her with a paper "ring" that says will you marry me or pick your ring....
OR
You can act like you have to get a battery replaced in a watch or something and have her go with you to the jewelers to do it (this works well if you do it on the way to go out to eat together, then you also get the out to eat celebration dinner). Then you just ask her while you are at the jewelers and pick the ring together then.
IF you for some reason cant do either of these ideas, I suggest letting her choose her ring... she will be the one having to wear it, so you will want to be certain she loves it.
2007-03-27 18:27:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband surprised me with the engagement ring. But a lot of our friends went shopping together.
I preferred the surprise but I can see how some may want to pick it out together it is a major purchase and something she will wear for the rest of her life.
2007-03-27 18:33:03 · answer #6 · answered by tashag2805 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go together... the ring is a major investment and something that she'll be (hopefully!) wearing every day for the rest of her life. It's too important a decision to make on your own.
Besides.. she already knows what you're up to :)
Congratulations on finding the right woman :D
2007-03-27 17:57:00 · answer #7 · answered by endorable 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go looking together so you know what she likes and is looking for. Then based on the types she picks out, make your decision. Or at least let you go through a jewelry catalog with you.
2007-03-27 18:00:08 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that you should know your girlfriend well enough to answer this question yourself. Is she a practical type or a "romantic" type? Think about her personality and attitudes, and the answer will present itself.
My husband and I went to get a ring together; I wouldn't have it any other way.
2007-03-27 19:23:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I gave my boyfriend a lot of opitons and different price ranges at different stores, so then that way I am happy with what ever he chooses and I am surprised with what ever he chooses! But the bottom line is I'm still surprised....lol
2007-03-27 18:21:47 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋