Hey please help me out here. I am 22 years old and just got married a couple of days ago, to a Nigerian. He was born in American so no he doesnt need citizenship. Anyways, we have been together for 3.5 years and told his parents we wanted to get married. They went crazy, his moms head did a 360 degree spin. They told us if we get married not to call them and when we have children not to never ever call them. They said that we are to young and not stable, mind you we make over 90k a year and have no children. Were pretty stable, I have some college and my husband has a B.S from UCLA and is working on his M.A. Well we got married anyway and are moving out in a month. PROBLEM IS, he doesnt want to tell his parents we are married and he doesnt wear his wedding ring around his parents. It hurts me so much. He wants to pretend that when we move out it is his apartment and that I DONT live there, it sucks because im going to be paying half the rent and half of all the bills what do i do.
2007-03-27 10:21:40 · 4 answers · asked by misso 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If he's not strong enough to stand up to his parents and let them know the truth - then I would just tell him to forget it. You will be lying and hiding from them for the rest of your life - can you honestly be bothered with that? :-/
2007-03-27 10:57:35 · answer #1 · answered by Butterscotch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They were hoping that he would marry a nigerian woman since many ethnic groups expect their kids to marry of the same background. I am sure that he had no intentions of marrying a nigerian woman. It's going to take some time for the parents to get used to their son being married. If you guys are financially stable and arent struggling then what's the deal? It's either he told his parents he wanted to get married or lay up in a house with a woman and not having any intent of making her his wife. If you're helping your husband in school it's the least you can do since once he finishes you can go back for your education.
Don't worry, but it will take time just be patient and his parents will have to get over it because it's done and he's happy with being married to you. The problem with many nigerian parents is that they think they still have control over their kids after they get grown. Your husband is a grown man and needs to tell his parents that he is a married man and that they are to respect you as his wife.
2007-03-27 17:30:43 · answer #2 · answered by nabdullah2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Didn't anyone tell you African guy's (families) were proud like this? You would have been better off with a white boy from America. They will have a hard time accepting you; I hope you can make good cous-cous.
Funny how it's "your" money now. That's probably the same way his parents see it, as a problem and burden. If you're serious about making it work between you two I would finish school and work on your masters, because this is how many Nigerian families with money view/ qualify people, if you understand what I mean.
Best of luck to you.
2007-03-27 17:31:02 · answer #3 · answered by ruondafloyet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a big baby and a chicken. Hardly a man, and not much of a husband. His parents were right about you being too young-- you married a little boy. Tell his parents yourself. Have some self-respect!
2007-03-27 17:26:21 · answer #4 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋