they've been together just over 2 yrs they have a child together but he said he wants to leave her and i feel the same as him we've liked each other since the first time we seen each other ..... help!!!
2007-03-27 09:28:24 · 27 answers · asked by kez 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he's not married to her she treats him like **** i have a child aswell as him and he's already told her that he wants to leave her
2007-03-27 09:46:31 · update #1
Why are you girls even considering having affair with married man with children? Sometimes I feel like you girls deserve that.
2007-03-27 09:31:16 · answer #1 · answered by Desi 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. If they didn't have a child together, it would be an easy answer. If no child, then I would say, you should both follow your heart. However, if there is a chance they can make it work..........for the sake of the child, I would walk away. Sometimes doing the right thing isn't always what makes us happiest at the time. However, I don't think intentionally splitting up a family is the right thing to do. Just my opinion......obviously, I don't know all the facts and there could be many at work that would make this man want to leave the mother of his child. Also, how can you be sure you have a future with this person? Is it really worth splitting up a family to find out? There are a lot of people that I have "liked" but with a child involved it would have to be a lot more than liking each other for me to be willing to go down that path. As the wise say, "there's lots of fish in the sea." I'd look for one with a little less strings attached. Best of luck.
2007-03-27 16:37:58 · answer #2 · answered by Amy27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He cannot be like this, and nor can you! You should respect yourself more and know your not going to be an easy rebound.
Realise that he is with someone else, and you should stop being so selfish, they have a child together....
Don't let YOU be the reason for their brake-up. If they do eventually brake-up then maybe consider it, as he apparently loves you.
But at the end of the day if his undying love is true, then he will leave her, but his child is far more important than a long term crush with someone... Being in love is knowing and acknowledging a whole person, not fancying someone elses man - for god sake get a grip, it probably wouldn't last long as he would be under stress from feeling guilty and leaving his child...
So you like him? love him? being together will change what? I'll tell you what, the physical side of it -sex- thats all you two want, he craves you and you crave him.
Think about the consequences before you make any irresponsible actions, and that includes your mates b/f.
You obviously don't understand that when he leaves you too, you won't have a mate left anymore because you were selfish enough to take away her man, and a father.
Really think about it
2007-03-27 16:43:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am in a similar situation although they don't have any children. I really feel for you as it's horrible I chose to leave the town where we were all living and said that he had to make the decision to leave her(have to say had known her along time but not really a friend as such) and if he left her and sorted his life out then I would consider us. They have a house together which he needs to sell as well. We talk almost everyday which is nice but my life is not on hold so if the chance of meeting someone else is there and I feel that it's right then I will go for it and he has to understand that. I guess what I'm trying to say is stay away from both of them for now and let him make his decision to leave because he is unhappy not because of you that way if it happens and he does leave her you won't be blamed and you can start to build a relationship as it should be not based on lies and cheating. People will have their opinion but they will soon find something else to talk about and hopefully you 2 can be happy. Good Luck x
2007-03-27 17:04:22 · answer #4 · answered by phillippa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you'd lose your friend over an attraction, wow, you do seem like a good friend - tell her that he came onto you and go from there. I mean, honestly - they have a child together and have been together for 2 yrs, and you don't think he'd leave you in that situation either, how old are you really? Seriously, she does need to know that the "man" in her life is trying to pull her world out from under her, and it's your duty, I guess if she really is your friend to let her know.
2007-03-27 16:35:52 · answer #5 · answered by HappilyEverAfter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a love triangle waiting to explode. If you are good friends with this person I would suggest taking there feelings into consideration. If you 2 felt this way to begin with than it must've been sexual attraction and not what you 2 are calling love. Think this through very carefully because this can mean losing a friendship and also it may mean regret for you and the man because he will be paying child support until his child turns 18.
2007-03-27 16:35:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way I see it, if he is willing to cheat on her with you, then who is to say he won't turn around and do the same for the next girl that has caught his eye? If he really felt that way he would have already done something instead of just talked about it. And it better be more than a like if you are going to get yourself caught up in this mess, because that is what it will become.
2007-03-27 16:34:39 · answer #7 · answered by furb_nasty 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
look, this guy has a child. Do you rally want to mess up your friend's family by being with him? Plus, which honorable man would leave his wife and child for another woman? He will do the same to you if the same scenario appears. Don't be stupid. Stop this guy in his tracks and make him see why he married his wife and why he had children with her so their marriage can sustain.
2007-03-27 16:35:18 · answer #8 · answered by Super Haitian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im inclined to think its the pressure of a young child getting to him, and you are free instead of tied down like his partner, the grass is greener etc. how would you feel if you were the one left in the lurch with a child? its your choice, but if you want committment, hes not the one, as hes made it clear he will bail out when he wants something outside what a family life offers
2007-03-27 16:36:02 · answer #9 · answered by chakra girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't do it. if he really loved you, he wouldn't have had kids with her. and you would lose her forever. Not to mention what the kids would have to go through growing up knowing their dad ran off with their mom's best friend. I've made a vow a while back and promised I would never be the other women. You shouldn't be either. But whatever, it's your decision to make. Good luck.
2007-03-27 16:34:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have one word for you...THREESOME.
On a serious note, the guy sounds like a scumbag and is willing to cheat on the mother of his child??!! You need to tell your friend the truth to protect her and her child. If he is looking to cheat right now then he will also want to cheat down the road. Time to straighten him out before it is too late.
2007-03-27 16:33:21 · answer #11 · answered by Mr. Luva Luva 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋