I am a runner, I have a tremendous wall built around my heart&no matter how I try I cant let anyone in, help??

Question

You see what I mean is that I have experienced so much loss and I am to proud or scared to really put down my burdens and find more blessings in other's love to me and maybe trust a man, I have no trust at all, when I say trust I mean emotional not physical like I fear that I will get cheated on, I am more confident than that but I mean like I m afraid that I have a hard time letting anyone know I care, and opening the hearts doors
I dont want to tell them becuase I am not used to people telling me no. Isnt rejection it's Pride
I havent been in a relationship over a year.I am attractive/educated but its easier for me to run, then hear the words that hurt, then to understand someone's individuality.I need not to be so hard/desensitized. Maybe some of you in your part of the world will understand. Frankly I dont and no one has told me anything more, than you have to let someone love you , you need to love yourself, I have self love,still water run deep. Advice please, Im 31 NOT GOOD!

Answer 1

WHAT IN THE WORLD does being a runner have to do with anything? Unless you're running away from getting involved and being sensitive! You answer all your own questions and the answer lies in you. Hurting is as much a part of life as dying, you never know them until you go through them, so why are you so unrealistic? You need to focus on the meaning of life so you can experience it. Actually, being vulnerable is real humanity, right now you're escaping your humanity and your true self. Don't be afraid! Run for it, not from it.
Love is a beautiful thing and the old saying is true, that "it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

Answer 2

You can find love without putting down the walls to your heart. All that you have to do is just get to know someone and I mean the true person that they are. It's not an easy thing to do, but it can be done. Don't rush into anything serious too fast. Just start out as friends and take it from there.

Answer 3

hurt is a word everyone's afraid of. but let me tell you something, in my past experience i use to think exactly like you until i realise that hurt only makes you stronger. not only that you need to start trusting again. when you meet someone give them the benefit of the doubt and trust them totally, then if you see that they are not worth it, then back off. and listen if you feel a certain way about someone, tell them cuz they could be feeling the same way about u. but if not. at least you told them and you don't have to worry about regreting you didn't after.

Answer 4

Seek the advice of a professional. There is a root to this problem somewhere that is not just about pride. I know alot of people feel that it is taboo to go to a mental health professional, but you should really talk with someone to get to the cause of the runner mindset

Answer 5

sure I do yet then i think maximum folk do - particularly whilst around human beings they don't recognize. it particularly is totally organic with the aid of fact believe has lots to do with it and we can't believe those we don't recognize. So the greater 2 human beings spend jointly and start to sense believe in the direction of one yet another, the decrease the wall is going. i think of girls in specific are greater guarded, and with solid reason with the aid of fact there are various adult males available eager to apply them for his or her own choose.

Answer 6

befriend lots of people, one of those friendships has to turn out well, befriend both sexes, if you dont get a BF, you'll end up w/ a great friend, so its a win/win

Answer 7

grow up...