BUDDHISTS: I find myself attracted to Buddhism, but I do have one problem. Can you help me?

Question

I find myself HIGHLY attracted to the philosophy and religion of Buddhism. But I do have an issue, that of the Buddha's renunciation. From my understanding of the Buddha's life, he abandoned his wife and child, and never even spoke with them again. Wouldn't this go against his teachings of compassion for all living beings?

It doesn't matter how wealthy or how royal someone is. A father has responsibilities to his children. Even if he wasn't enlightened at that point, shouldn't he have returned to make some reconciliation or to at least check in on them and see how they were? If giving up your attachments to your responsibilities is something Buddhism requires, maybe I need to reconsider converting to Buddhism.

Answer 1

Although he left his family, he also left his Life of a nobleman yet left his family supported.

After attaining his enlightenment, he actually returned to teach his family the Dharma.The Lord Buddha's message to family folk is that there is happiness and joy to be found there and that there is great responsibility inherent in parenting.

It is documented that he taught his son Rahula, his step mother Mahapajapati Gotami and his brother Nanda to Ahrantship.

It is a wrong view that he never spoke with them again, quite incorrect.

Peace from a Buddhist...

Answer 2

Renunciation is not what you think it is from this story. Renunciation has more to do with disgust for the unsatisfactoriness of cyclic existence and the "wish to definitely get out" of cyclic existence. I would investigate the Dharma a little more if you are interested, and try and see if what you hear about what the Buddha taught is useful to you.

Answer 3

First,I would like to clarify that Gautama ,The Buddha,did not leave his 'family'.The man that left his family was Siddhattha Gautama.Gautama Buddha was an enlightened being,whereas,Siddhattha was only a Bodhisatta.This distinction is very important in answering your question.

As a family man,I say, Siddhattha was selfish,etc,when he left his sleeping wife and child.Walking away from his family was wrong.
At least,when Siddhattha left his family behind,he knew they were in good hand.No worry over food,etc.At present,I am in similar dilemma.I have the intention to enter the monkshood,but,I still have four sons in college and university and they are dependent on me.When they are independent,then I will renounce the world.

Let us look at what Siddhattha found after leaving his family.He became The Buddha.He discovered The Truths.The Truths that lead human beings out of the cycle of Suffering.As a Buddhist,I am grateful to Siddhattha for acting selfishly in leaving his family.If not for his selfish act of leaving his family,the world will still be living in darkness.

Namo Tassa Bhagavato Arahato Samma-Sambuddhasa
Namo Tassa Bhagavato Arahato Samma-Sambuddhasa
Namo Tassa Bhagavato Arahato Samma-Sambuddhasa

Metta to all.

Answer 4

His point was that no matter what he did, short of finding an absolute cure to suffering would ever REALLY help them... only finding enlightenment would, which is why he left. His absolute love for everyone, altruism, was what spurred him to finding that absolute "cure" to suffering, no amount of being around, no amount of money, nothing else could free them. THAT was what he wanted, to give them the greatest gift he could, an end to suffering.

His family ultimately became students of his and attained levels of enlightenment themselves.

_()_

Answer 5

Maybe they were happy to be rid of him.

You have to remember that the notion of marrying due to a romantic attraction is relatively new. During most of human history, marriage was to produce the best offspring, so people who were supposedly of "noble" blood would never marry a commoner.

In ancient Greece, many men were more attracted to young boys than women. They married only to have children, and the women lived apart. It was considered normal.

So, maybe when Budda announced his surprise departure, his wife uncerimoniously replied, "Fine. Don't let the door smack you in your big, fat stomach on the way out".

Answer 6

He was not enlightened at that point. He was a young guy who just took off and tried to find himself. I am pretty sure that was an arranged marriage anyway. And like Hot Carl Sagan said, they were royalty, all this meant was that his son was first in line to be king, and that his wife didn't have to deal with his whims.

Answer 7

i'm a Christian woman who grew to become into married to a Christian guy for 23 years. we've 3 astonishing young ones jointly and have been extreme college sweethearts... THIS guy RAISED HELL IN OUR HOUSHOLD! devoid of going into information, there grew to become into lots mendacity, infidelity, verbal, actual and psychological abuse. Did I point out we've been the two Christians? i'm now definitely going to marry the main alluring guy I ve ever nicely-known. jointly as initially i grew to become into worried that he grew to become into Buddhist, I not have that venture. i admire him, he respects me, he loves me, and that i'm deeply in love with him. all of us understand the place the different is in our spirituality and that i visit proceed to desire for the two one human beings. I ve by no skill been so happy!

Answer 8

Don't worry,I won't tell anyone. I too find myself attracted to the Buddha.

Answer 9

it's not like he tortured and killed them, or tried to get his wife to murder their child or anything. he just left them in the royal palace to live in comfort as they wish. it wasn't an act completely without compassion, as he was trying to help them as well as people in general.

but that is one thing about buddhism that i found hard to grasp, as i think family & friends (attachments) are what life is all about! i guess i'm just not at that stage yet ;)

Answer 10

They were royalty, they were fine. He wanted to learn how to end suffering for everyone. It's actually prophetic in a way since he found the way to end suffering is to give up attachment.