Help, I'm loosing my mind!!!?

Question

My 3 and 1/2 year old isn't wanting to sleep anymore. She is extreemly tired when she doesn't take a nap in the afternoons, but she never wants to lay down and sleep anymore. She used to do just fine and now out of the blue she has decided that she will not take a nap. Nothing has changed in her daily life....also at night when we put her to bed she gets up about every 15 to 20 min and asks if she can go to the potty....I let her go because I don't want her to wet the bed....But last night was the worst...we played her game for 3 hours until finally we told her no.....and then she wet the bed about 3 hours after that....and then about 2 hours later she came running into the bedroom (it's like 3 in the morning) and said good morning mom and dad, can I have hugs and kisses...I was SOOO tired and mad because I don't understand why she is doing this and I don't know how to stop it...I hate spanking her and try to leave that for extreem situations...Someone please give me some advice!!

I really don't think that she has a UTI....she doesn't go potty that much unless it is nap time or if she is in timeout....she will find any excuse to get out of bed or out of time out.....if the potty excuse doesn't work then it is the I want a drink or can I come out now, my cloaths scare me....or my blanket scares me.....she is full of excuses when it comes to sleepy time or time out....

Answer 1

Ugh, I feel your pain. I went through a similar situation wtih my daughter that is now 3, back about 6 months ago. First, at 3 1/2 she is ready to give up naps, and if nothing else will make her a bit more tired at night so don't worry about that. the bathroom bit is definitely a stall tactic for bedtime. I would be very firm and consistent with the bedtime ritual - we sit on the potty ONE time before bedtime. As for potential accidents... my daughter still wears pullups at night. If you'd rather not go that route, a cheater route is for my son, I'd tuck a towel or two under him, so that if he had an accident, I'd just have to whip off the towel instead of completely changing sheets. For the getting out of bed and coming into your room part..... for my daughter, every night when I tucked her in, I reminded her that she's a big girl and she's to stay in her bed until its "light" out. Then whenever she'd get out of bed (because they'll always test you!) I consistently marched her right back to her bed. Tried that "supernanny" technique, of not talking to her, etc. Combined that with anytime she did stay in her bed all night, praised her like crazy. Anyways, this seemed to have done the trick. I will still have the odd night where she'll test me again and get out, but its so rare now.

I will admit once or twice during the process I threatened to take away her blankie (her security item she has to sleep wtih) if she got out of bed again. That helped!! :)

Answer 2

Your child is having some sleep disturbances. I am sure you have guessed that by now. Is your child normally hyper? This could be a sign of other things going on with her.

I would not give into the potty thing. Have a potty time right before bed time, if she is prone to wetting the bed use night pants. Put her back in bed when she gets up even if it is three in the morning. If she has wet her bed cover the spot with another sheet or towel and take care of it in the morning so that you don't waiste to much time getting her back to bed. If you let her go to the potty several times she will keep doing that. She will develope her bladder a little better if she is told to go potty before bedtime.

If this problem continues, I would take her to her doctor. But you need to keep a document of all her behaviors. It is not unusual for a three year old to refuse a nap, but it is unsual for a child to wake up many times in the night or to wake up earlier than six or seven O clock and this should be monitored. If you have tried putting her back in been for a couple of weeks are so and it is simply not working then you may need to look into the fact that she needs a bit of medical help.

I am sorry that you are dealing with this. I know exactly how you feel, my son used to wake up at three in the morning and would not go back to bed till nine at night. Turns out he had sleep apnea.

Answer 3

If I were in your shoes here's what I'd do:
I would not play her game. No matter how much she screams and cries and protests. If she wets the bed and is supposed to be potty trained, I would tell her to potty right before bed and do not give her ANY liquids 2 hours before bed time no matter what. It will help with bed wetting. Get a mattress pad as well for accidents. And lastly, good night means good night. Turn on her night light, turn out the big light, give her a kiss and tell her goodnight and leave. If she begins to holler or throw a tantrum, shut her door and tell her when she's ready to be a big girl and stop crying then you will open her door again. YOU are the parent. Do not let her run the house. If she comes in at 3 am again, I'm sorry but she would get a firm, not harsh, swat on the back side and put her back to bed and shut her door. Put up a baby gate if that is necessary. Tell her if she gets up again unless it is a true emergency, then she will get a spanking, get a toy taken away or something of that nature. Waking you up at 3 am seems extreme enough to me to give a spanking. That's my way of handling it. Some would call it too much, but that is the way my parents would have handled it and that's the way we handle our son. I don't spank for everthing, but some things merit one. I hope this helps and good luck with this situation.

Answer 4

dont give her a bottle or drink at bed anymore, she probably does have to go to the bathroom if she is drinking before or during bedtime. At about 3 most toddlers stop having naps, from what Ive been told by my parent friends. My 2yr old is just starting to get out of nap time and is also exhausted by bed time. But quiet time is still needed at that age. Maybe have her read in bed at nap time or let her cry it out and fall asleep that way, if you think she still NEEDs that nap.

Answer 5

I don't know who started the saying "terrible two's", but being a mother of three (ages 5,7,&,9) I think that the 3's can be more trying. I went through this with all of mine. What made it bareable for me was to keep them active in the morning hours, we liked to go for a walk (not a ride in the stroller), or put on some upbeat music and dance, whatever it takes to get them tired. We would have rest time, even if they didn't sleep they had to lay quitely. If you don't mind me asking, what time does she go to bed/wake up? Do you have a set bedtime routine? My son had a tendecy to wet the bed until I started to make sure that he didn't get anything to drink close to bedtime. Having a routine made a huge difference because I didn't have one with my oldest at first. Our bedtime routine started with a light healthy snack, then on to clean up time, fun with special bathtime toys, a favorite story book, and finally lights out. Hang in there it does get better.

Answer 6

When my daughter broke herself of her afternoon naps it took a few months for her body to adjust, which made my afternoons miserable. The constant pottying I would see if she has a bladder infection, that can cause that. My best advice hang in there, it can be so tiring at times, but it will pass.

Answer 7

let her skip the naps, maybe it will make her more tired at nite. as for the constant having to pee i think you should talk to her pediatrician, so they can make sure her urinary tract is ok. don't give her anything to drink after dinner. if she is extremly thirsty a small sip of water at the most. try to explain to her that the sandman is watching and she needs to stay in bed for him to be able to do his work since he has sooooooooooooo many kids he has to give the sleep sand too, that he really counts on her help.............good luck

Answer 8

Is she actually using the bathroom all those times she gets up? Could she have a bladder infection?

Answer 9

Look up a program called "love and logic." It will make you much less stressed out.

Answer 10

A loose mind is a difficult thing to catch...