Do you think that a jewish family would be happy about thier son marrying someone NOT jewish?

Question

my friend is engaged to a jewish guy, and she seems to think his family are not particulary happy. sensible answers only please......

i know.. stupid isn't it. he says his family are fine about it, and really like her, but when it comes to planning for the future they want nothing to do with it and to me, that is a danger light. he is not particulary very traditional at all actually.

Answer 1

as the others have mentioned, the denomination (reform, conservative, orthodox) definitely affects how they view inter-faith marriage.

I think that the family probably has concerns about what being Jewish means to their son, and whether your friend and her fiance have discussed what part religion plays in their life together. how will the holidays be celebrated? how will the children be raised? is someone going to synagogue on saturday and the other parent attends church on sunday? which tradition will the wedding celebration be or will it be a justice of the peace? is it the answers to these questions that have the parents concerned?

having spoken last fall to the parents of a childhood friend who was marrying someone non-Jewish (i watch packers football with them and they're like second parents), their concerns incl the fact that the son had previously said he wanted a Jewish wife and family, and the mom had talked to the girl about the questions i've listed above. (so they were excited when the ceremony was a combination of traditions)

Speaking as the child of an interfaith marriage - my parents had discussed how they would raise children before they were married, and my mother understood what raising children Jewish meant to my father. I remember asking my non-Jewish grandmother whether she had been concerned, and she was more concerned mom was marrying someone American (they are British and amazed mom would live that far from home, but it has worked fine :).

years ago, i asked my mom how she would feel about me marrying someone non-Jewish, and she pointed out that it is completely my choice, but i needed to understand the various issues that will arise.

many parents will appreciate some thoughtful, verbal decisions/discussions, and other parents will choose to overlook that their child has found someone because they see that person as a threat to the continuance of their tradition.

i wish your friend the best, and hope that she and her fiance are very happy.

Answer 2

Well.......Maybe His Family Isn't Happy With Their Son Marrying Someone Out Of Their Culture.

But If They Love Their Son They Should Respect Who He Loves.

Answer 3

the fast answer is basic. Jewishness is a an ethnicity, a nationality, AND a faith. the least perplexing way for Western cultures to comprehend this, is to remember that interior the formative days of Judaism, the favourite seen the geographical area did no longer exist. The dominant social employer previous the family contributors unit grow to be the tribe. in case you recognize the Jewish human beings as a tribe, it particularly is basic to make certain that: - maximum Jews are Jewish by using fact they have been born into the tribe. - The Jewish faith is the dominant cultural function that binds tribe contributors at the same time - it particularly is feasible, yet very perplexing, to be totally common into the tribe via following a sufficient form of cultural (religious) practices, decrease than the decent auspices of a regarded formal chief (ie/Orthdodox Jewish Rabbi) traditionally, Jews have been defined as a race (third Reich Germany) and a nationality (u.s.). English speaking westerners are extra the exception than the guideline, as our secular way of existence has made faith and nationality lots extra diverse from one yet another to a extra robust degree than previous worldwide cultures.

Answer 4

It sounds as if his parents are very traditional and have strong religious beliefs so no they probably aren't happy with their son marrying an "other". It can cause problems if the couple let's it. It needs to be up to the guy to tell his folks that hey, "I love her and this is the way it is" either you love her or I walk. The whole point of marriage is to leave and cleave regardless of religion.

Answer 5

It might be a personality clash. It might be a religious clash.

If she thinks his family has a problem with her, that's something to start working out now, during the engagement. Otherwise the wedding ceremony wrangle will be truly awful.

Her fiance can start paving the way by talking to his family himself, to find out what their issues are, and start the ball rolling toward finding a middle ground.

Answer 6

I think Jewish people want to keep the marriage within their Jewish community. My friend married a Jew, and the parents were at the wedding as if they didn't care, but we knew how miserable they were and how they tried to prevent it.

Answer 7

Who cares what they think! As long as the bride and groom are happy! I'm getting married in April and I know her familly is not thrilled with me, and non of us are Jewish. This stuff drives me crazy! Tell her not to worry about it. He is marring her not the rest of the family!

Answer 8

i understand your friends dilemma, to marry outside of one faith such as judaism and any other faith would cause upset to family members. christians are more welcoming and more apathetic. marriage is a time for joy, but speaking as a devout catholic myself whos own brother married a protestant (which i was dead against anyway, the marriage itself was dissolved last year). stick to your own. that way everybodys happy.

Answer 9

Think that all depends on how deep into there religion they are.Your friend may be reading too much into his parents.
Tell her to relax they must like her to agree to the engagement.

Answer 10

It obviously depends on the family, how religious they are, how strict they are with their son and whether their son's happiness is more important than their so called "family reputation".