why did he do this?

Question

i have a long distance relationship, he always talked of the future, when i was down he lifted my spirits and gave me hope, reassuring me constantly, but things became a little complicated at the weekend and he dumped me by email, i cannot understand how he gave up so easily after all the things we taked about, i'm in bits and need him why did he do this, did he decide it was just easier to give up now or did he get scared of his true feelings. any advice greatly recieved.

i am getting out of a crap marriage, my seperation has nothing to do with him and was pretty much over before i met him, thats where the complications begin.

Answer 1

Sorry to hear about your break up sweetie, but just look at the way he ended it, by email? He's a scumbag. He hid behind his computer to tell you that it was over, that is not a man and you deserve so much better.

Only he knows why he ended it and guessing what it was and doing the old 'what if' does nothing but stop the heart from healing. Trust me, ive done this before. Its hard but it will get better. Just think to yourself when your feeling down that any guy that can split up with you over email and without reason is not worth your time, let alone your thoughts and tears;

Answer 2

It could be that he's been wanting to break up for a long time and just chickened out and took the easy way out. I'd say that sending an e-mail to break up was very inconsiderate and he isn't worth it. He probably isn't the guy you thought, and you're probably better off now since you can find someone with a little more decency. The least he could've done was talk on the phone. It may seemed like he gave so easily, but I'm sure it was probably lingering in his mind for a while. It'll be hard in the beginning as ALL break-ups usually are, but THINGS WILL GET BETTER.....

Answer 3

Oh hun I"m sorry about the breakup. I actually went through the same thing with my last ex. I would wait a bit for him to think about what it was that he actually did. I know my ex came crawling back a few weeks later after realizing what he gave up. I would say, if you really want to be with him, give him a little time. However, I wouldn't wait around for him either. Go on and live your life. Go out and have fun, do things you want to do that you may not have done because you were in a long distance relationship. If it was meant to be, it'll happen.

Answer 4

Maybe he is a little confused himself. Afterall, you've split from your husband, and went into another one soon after. Nothing wrong with that. I will add that I got with my new bloke after 2 months of splitting from my ex husband - No he wasn't the cause, I moved away, back home and met him. He knew right from the start what my circumstances were, and he stood by me.

Maybe he has things happening in his life that are putting to much pressure on him? or perhaps he hasnt been completely honest, and backed out before it went too far?

My advice? Take life by the hands. Enjoy what youve got and what your gonna achieve. Build on new friendships and do all the things you ever wanted. When you get to the 'I don't want a man, or need one.' stage, one will turn up. One that will help you and support you and will stand by you, even through all your tough times.

Chin up lovey, lifes to short hun.

Answer 5

I am sorry Kira, what you are going through, i have been through the same thing, he promised me the world and then he ended it, i am still hurting even after 3 years. Sometimes you ask questions to yourself, and you cannot find the answers, i tried to talk to him, but he never gave me a chance, and now looking back, i think he didn't mean it, cause he just changed over night. i still miss him today, but its a waste of my energy. If you can try to talk to him, then try, i hope you will have much luck than i did. He dumped you by email, Kira he is a coward, maybe you are better of without him, before it had got too late, count your lucky stars, you will find someone better for you, who will worship you. I know it is painful and very hurtful, but hey life has to go on, and remember it is his loss. Good luck

Answer 6

How are any of us supposed to know the reasons behind why he broke up with you? You need to ask him! If you really think it will help you heal and move on, ask him what the problem was and why he broke it off. Don't act desperate though - it's not appealing and it'll lessen the chances of him ever wanting to get back with you. The unfortunate thing is, you can't make him be with you. If he wanted out of the relationship, you are just going to have to pick yourself up and brush yourself off. You'll be okay once the pain subsides, and you'll find someone even better eventually. Sorry, sweetie.

Answer 7

He shouldn't have finished it over e-mail and he should have explained things properly to you. Without making you feel worse maybe he had met someone else.
You kind of give the impression in your question that there were difficulties in the relationship as you talk about giving up.
I know my answer isn't much help but if that how he feels its how he feels and you are better off out of it instead of being with someone who is stringing you along.
Just give yourself time and things will get better.

Answer 8

How did things get complicated? anyhow, it would be good to find out what happened, a real talk in person or at least a phone call. Sending an email to dump you is just plain rude.

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Answer 9

Guys can get mixed up at sometimes! Like always thinking about the future ,but never the present. Don't get upset over one guy! Like I always say "There are plenty of fish left in the sea." There is someone else in this big world that is your prince charming!

Answer 10

Some people are all talk, it is nice to fantasize about the future. Find a friend who can be there for you, in person, it makes things a lot easier