I just found out the real reason my ex left me and feel like a fool. Someone hit me back to reality.?

Question

During the time I met her, she was in a week emotional state. She got out of a 2 year relationship and having problems of all sort. Being the "nice" guy that I am I was there for her; we ended up falling for each other. Out of nowhere, she decided she wanted to be friends because she was not ready for relationship. I respected it and so we became friends.

However, I just found out accidently (3 months later) that the reason she broke up with me was because she left me for her close high school friend. During the time I started getting closer, she tried giving him a chance and he ****** her over for 3 weeks playing mind games and forcing her for sex and be each other's first. She also told me that she realized that him and her could only be friends and nothing more than that…

A part of me doesn’t blame her for doing what she did and wish her happiness. but the other is that I cant help but feel that I was used. We are in the same class and I just can't help but view her differently.

Answer 1

GOOD!!! For one this stuff happens, and your going to view her differently to the core. Its all right stuff like this can make great history or destroy it before it even gets started. One thing your beganing to realize is that life doesn't go smoothie and is full of "reality checks". You've got a good sense of unconditional love there, excellent!, but at the same time realize your dealing with a female that isn't sure what she is doing. Thats the problem with being the "nice" guy is that it gives to much credit to the person your being nice to which isn't what they want. They want to know what to do! Point blank she most likly went with this guy because he gave her more direction then you. Not to say it was a good direction but people dealing with deep insecurities can't be left in charge. Doesn't mean you steamroll them over and make them do what you say, it means that you push them to do whats right for them. Don't talk to her about things you don't know and concentrate on things you do. Its time if you want to take your life to the next step there, to understand that there is a "right" direction to go, and a dozen ways to get there. Of course the deepth of such talk is beyond typing on here.... ether way grow from this experience and remeber that nice has to be balance with realility, take care of yourself..