Ok, so we have gone out once a wk. Our first date was perfect, we had an excellent conversation, later saw a movie and then had a mini makeout session.
*Our Physical Chemistry has been Amazing on every Date.
Date 2 = Dinner, wine and a two hour makeout session... not too much convo
Date 3 = play mini golf, lots of physical contact, some flirting, no serious convo. make-out session
Date 4 = Coming up
Are make-out sessions consist of kissing all over the upper body, hugging, no sex, and touching... also playing with each other's underwear lines, but not going lower
No Oral as of now
He hardly phones me, it's mostly text messages via cell or instant messanger.
He'll ask me question I respond to and when I ask him, his are brief answers.. ex... how was Sat. Ans = Good... no detail
How do I get him to want to be exclusive??? I think he might be a player...
2007-03-26 18:30:27 · 23 answers · asked by coolchick 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for answering my question - to answer your question about being exclusive he wanted to be. He says he only wants to date 1 girl. So he brought it up. We met through Yahoo personals, and after 3 dates over a 2 week period he asked me, well told me...lol
We did the whole make out thing too, but only on the third date, he didn't kiss me until then. :) Now things are great and hot!
So I will take your advise and wait before dropping the "L" bomb.
To answer your question above, some guys like to just make out. Do you know what he is looking for? Long term, what are his priorities? School? Work? By becoming his friend, good friend you should be able to figure this out.
Perhaps he is waiting for you to show more interest.
2007-03-26 19:31:19 · answer #1 · answered by turkey killer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women toss that 'player' term around but it's pretty much meaningless. All it means is that a man knows how to date, it doesn't mean he's a jerk. Anyway he doesn't sound like a bad guy or like he only has one thing on his mind. He's not pressuring you into sex, but he's also not making any bones about his sexual interest.
Your worried that he doesn't give you the conversation you want. Here's a newsflash: Men and Women don't think alike! Good conversation is one of life's great joys, but he may not be skilled in that area, and he probably isn't thinking about the same things you are at the same time. This is something he probably will get better at as time goes on and he learns who you are (and it's important for you to learn who he is too - every conversation shouldn't be just yours).
Your description sounds good, not at all like a player, and I think he really likes you.
Have fun!
2007-03-26 18:38:11 · answer #2 · answered by Jon S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't exactly label him a player, but my opinion, I don't think he's thinking of you as "girlfriend material". Not yet, at least.
If he were, you guys would be talking a lot more. From my experience, guys are usually the most talkative in the beginning of a relationship. They want to know all about you; they like to talk/ask you about sports, cars, family, exes, favorite foods, movies, and so on.
But...he could also be like a lot of immature guys (like my brother and his ilk), and he may like you, but he wants to play it cool, so he won't look like a "punk" or "desperate". Anyway...I'd suggest easing up on the make-out and touchy-feely sessions. See how he reacts. If the conversations are still nil to none, but he still continues seeing you, that may just be his personality. He could just be a naturally non-talkative person. If he dodges you though, he was only after the panties.
2007-03-26 19:09:25 · answer #3 · answered by SweetMahogany 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust your instincts. If you're looking for a good time physically, keep it up and you'll get there. If you're looking for a "relationship", then you might want to wait a while to see where he's coming from. Many guys will push a girl as far as she will allow. But you know that a true relationship means good communication. So, if the communication isn't really that good but the physical is, you figure it out.
2007-03-26 18:35:47 · answer #4 · answered by judgebill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've only gone on 3 days and you want him to be exclusive? Isn't that possessive and controlling of you? He's not a player, you are just moving things too fast. If you are unsure of his intentions and cannot believe him for whatever reason, hold off on the physical stuff for now.
2007-03-26 18:34:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's because he IS a player. He doesn't want a commitment, he justs want to make-out and eventually use you for sex. You can't be upset about this, you're allowing him to do this to you. He doesn't call you, the two of you barely conversate, I'd say he is focusing on the physical attraction rather than anything else. Leave the guy alone, let him go treat his other girl like a piece of meat
2007-03-26 18:34:05 · answer #6 · answered by First Lady 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok he could be after sex alone, he is making effort to communicate with u, he might just not be a talker
so for the 4th &5th date, u make sure u go out to a place that forces u to talk to one another, resturant is good, &cut the make-out sesions to a simple peck, or kiss.
If he sticks around after that date, another one just like that, u can say he is intrested in u, just not a good communicator.
2007-03-26 18:39:31 · answer #7 · answered by Phoenix21 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man he is just tryin to hit like a tru mack. He is doing what we call putting your "quality time in". All you do is take a girl on a few dates, spend a little money, have sex , and keep on doing it into she gives you a lil drama. I mean when that works and she stays cool for a few months. u can wife her a little maybe hit without a rubber or something.
2007-03-27 10:01:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds shady to me. a guy who´s really interested will call and will say more than just a word when a question is asked. he will be interested in you. make-out sessions are fine as long as he shows interest... so the decrease in the amount of conversation is not a good sign. be careful.
2007-03-26 18:35:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My advice for you is to never see him again! Don't you want someone who will talk to you and spend hours on the phone talking about useless stuff and telling you his dreams for the future and how he sees it with you. I know that I want an attentionate and loving guy! so why would you fall for some random guy who needs someone to satisfy his physical desires... it's goo faster and faster and after date 8 you will be having sex with him. That's not what you want, so please don't put yourself in a situation like that!!
break up quickly!!
2007-03-26 18:40:44 · answer #10 · answered by Jakie22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋