two years ago, a close friend of mine, 'Jane', and I started to like each other but didn't form a relationship because 'Jane' had just broken up with her boyfriend of 2 years. A year later 'Jane' began to like me again but this time I was the one that didn't want the relationship. After pushing her away, my brother that is 4 years older than me began to hang out with her. They started to like each other and my brother asked me if it would be ok to go out with her. Considering he had gotten out of a 3 year relationship just months prior I thought it would be good for him to find another person. So I said it was fine because I thought she no longer liked me even though I still sort of liked her. After 6 months of my brother completely using her, sleeping with atleast 5 other girls including his ex, and using the excuse that they werent official, they broke up. About a month after I fell back in love with her and started a relationship and never been happier.. am I in the wrong?
2007-03-26 17:56:22 · 16 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
usually i would say yes, but considering the facts and that he used her, no i dont think your in the wrong at all, you love her he doesnt!
I say go for it if it makes you happy!
good luck :)
2007-03-26 18:00:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is so tough, because even though your brother totally used her he will probably be pissed when he finds out. I feel sorry for her for getting used, and I hope that you do not break the poor girls heart as well. I think that if your brother is a stand up guy he should be happy for both of you. Please be nice to this poor girl. By the way I know a guy that married his best friend and cousins ex-wife, and he is happier than ever. Even though she had always been to the family gatherings as the other guys wife, he says that the only thing that the family members say about it is wow look how happy they are .....she was never that way with her ex.
2007-03-26 18:02:05 · answer #2 · answered by Me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude....dont even go there.
You are feeling the "crave what you can not have" syndrome...(actual name or not)
Do anything but get serious with this girl....she is rebounding as well and the whole thing will probably end up in a huge mess, everyone mad at everyone, and you and your brother hating each other over the whole thing....
even being friends will be hard on your relationship with your brother. Remember....he is your blood brother,....family.....she is a girl that has been bouncing from dude to dude in your life. How long until she bouces out of your life and hurts you and then your brother says, "told you so"?????
Also.....how could you really respect her and take her seriously when she let your brother use her???? She will probably only be with you for revenge on him anyway.
2007-03-26 18:04:31 · answer #3 · answered by John K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
John K: We have actually been together for about 8 months now. We know we made a mistake in the past for not being honest about how we felt. We really care about each other and she is not doing this out of spite. I asked my brother before I went out with her if it were alright and he said it was ok. She has talked to him about it and he said he personally doesnt care. But sometimes i get the feeling that he is bothered by the fact that i like her. Its just the matter if he is being truthful about how he feels..
2007-03-26 18:29:11 · answer #4 · answered by anonymous 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it sounds like he wasn't that serious about her, and probably wont even care. so i think it would be OK. it is not like the girl and your brother were together for years and talked about marriage and stuff. besides you had her first. So no I don't think you are in the wrong especially if you treat her good, and it sounds like you do since you are happier then ever. So you be with that girl and don't have a doubts that it is wrong. Good luck to the 2 of you!!
2007-03-26 18:02:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think so, considering the fact that your brother clearly didn't even like her, let alone love her.
BUT, you should talk to your brother and explain that you regret not having talked to him about dating her first. Then explain how deeply you care for her and that you hope he can find it in his heart to be forgiving and happy for you.
2007-03-26 18:00:31 · answer #6 · answered by alisongiggles 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
same thing happened with me, and she ended up being the best girl that I ever had, but the relationship ended because I didn't want to marry her. but when I think back, she was the best girl I ever had. but its a good thing that I didn't marry her tough because she had some health problems afterwards . but anyway, I'd talk to your brother and make sure that there won't be any hard feelings and that he's okay with it .
2007-03-26 18:03:10 · answer #7 · answered by v k 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You cant help who you fall in love with. But it is a little sad. but if your happy and with her its to late to go back. Just hope that you don't lose a brother over her.
2007-03-26 18:02:56 · answer #8 · answered by christina b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nope, take the girl and make her happy. Except dont be so stupid to let her go again.
2007-03-26 18:00:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
regardless of whatever. i would not go out with my brothers ex due to that it will be really weird at family gatherings.
good luck!
2007-03-26 17:59:02 · answer #10 · answered by ty808 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋