Is he going to cheat on me?

Question

He is 34! Im 25. Every since hes moved in a month and a half ago, things went downhill...wed been together since Dec. Before that he was super romantic and attentive, spilling his feelings for me...we agreed to not put a label on it though. Anyway...i saw condoms one time in a see-through bag and got really upset. He didnt use them but it still freaked me out. I ended up drinking and saying some rude things. I apologized and he said he was gonna be patient. We made up...i ended up saying i needed space...anyway...after one night we went out with one of my best guy friends he got really mad bc he accused me of dancing with him, i didnt. I cried for two hours...he ignored me two days...he said he was disappointed and it wasnt what he thought. I saw on myspace he asked a girl on a date. He apologized and said they never met up. This weekend we went to a wedding and he kept grabbing my hand during the ceremony, carrying my wine glass, and kissing me. It was like old times.

i noticed that as soon as i went out of town this week he had changed his hi5 (he doesnt know im on there)...he put in his self-description things like "rebel" and "sexual", is he trying to attract someone? Ive also asked him to move out a couple of weeks ago and everytime i go to kiss him he asked if i changed my mind. Also, he is jealous of my guy friends.

i sent him a text message tonight and he never responded, it says that i miss you always when im gone...

Answer 1

i think hes cheating on you bc hes leading you up to it sry to tell you tho!

Answer 2

Rachel, I'm going to be the jerk that tells you that you're not his number one and probably will never be. Judging from your description of his actions, he's keeping you around until he finds something better. He's very possessive of you, because he doesn't want you to find out his true intentions. His asking out another person should reveal to you that he doesn't want to be with you monogamously. The absolute tragedy here is that he's making you feel insecure and unhappy if you do the same things he's doing; that to me is inexcusable.

There's a few things I think you should do. First, you need to ask yourself what you want out of the relationship, whether you want to be with him romantically and have a monogamous relationship, or you just want to be friends with benefits. Then you need to sit down with him and tell him so and set boundaries, if there is to be an exclusive relationship, then what his looking elsewhere need to cease. If you decide the latter, then he needs to know he has no right to interfere if you are to go out with another man. I won't lie to you, it will be difficult for you to adjust if he decides he doesn't want to be with you, but it is far better to know now and move on rather than waiting for the heartbreak to come to you, perhaps wasting years of your life before you realized that you were unhappy the whole time. Life is short, there are many better guys out there who would enjoy your company. Trust your intuition and stop being sad, keep in mind that a clean cut heals the quickest and it can't rain all the time.

Answer 3

What does it matter really,seems if everything has gone to crap already and I'm not exactly sure what it is you are trying to salvage.Seems you both have trust issues which should be addressed.When you use threats in a relationship can you really say you have a heathy relationship.If he feels he can't trust you or at least uses that as an excuse then why are you with him.Jealousy is never a good thing and only shows one doesn't believe your words.No offense but it appears as you both need to get a grip on yourself and figure out who you are before you can find another to be with you.

Answer 4

Okay, you two have some issues you really need to work out. It would be best for both of you if you just set aside a time to lay all of your cards out on the table and (as calmly as possible) discuss this. If things get too heated, try to take a break and come back to it later.

Tell him what you want in the relationship (realistically), what you don't like, and how you want to change the things you don't like. Be as honest as possible, but still tactful. Keep his feelings in mind and take care of how he might respond to certain delicate subjects, but don't lie or make stuff up to improve his reactions.

Good luck!

Answer 5

I would be giving this guy the flick if you ask him to leave your home dont' be go kissing him you are kicking him out for christ sakes!

It sounds like he is a looser anyway if you are finding condoms in his bag and he gets jelous of your male friends he is not worth having around. he is playing mental games with you that are not good for your self esteem why should he keep being romantic when he has a roof over his head and girl that can't bring herself to get him to leave and be honest about it....stop sending him mixed signals ask him to leave and break off the relationship. Find someone that is going to treat you right and has more in common with you.

Answer 6

Honey in case you have already got evidence he's cheating ("So i think of my bf is cheating doing the internet element I do have evidence, yet he hides his "cookies" temp archives which could hint what you're doing on line.. ") why could you want to proceed torturing your self finding for extra evidence? purely kick him to the cut down noone merits to be cheated on. i understand its much less annoying reported than performed because of the fact i'm specific you like him, yet love your self extra. No guy is ever nicely worth your tears.

Answer 7

I am 24 and my ex-husband is 34 he cheated on me with a 43yr old lady. We had a perfect marriage and then all of the sudden things like you are explaining started to happen to me...so the only thing i can say is always be alert and keep your eyes open.

Answer 8

Once you have sex things change. you can identify the couple sitting on a bench in park. if they are dating they will be intimate and very close. when married they sit on either corner of a bench leaving lot of space in between.

Answer 9

i think that he's a major flirt. my guess is that he have aready cheated on you based on the clues and stuff that you have found. if he haven't cheated as yet then he have the intention to. hon don't put up with it. confront the guy. let him know that you are concerned about the way that your relationship is going. he ought to shape up or dump his sorry ***...good luck

Answer 10

i think he's already doing it and trying to compensate by being sweet, a man who loves and respects u, wont be unfaithful to u, written, electronic, or in other things nor will he try to put blames that are not true.