My hubby just came home today from Iraq on r and r and he's in bed now sleeping. He's been very tired due to the time change, long long flight etc. He went to bed at 8 am and I went with him but got back up at about 9 because I just wasnt tired. He was also majorly sleep talking stuff that is obviously Iraq based stuff. It makes me worry about him. I don't want him to think he's in Iraq when he's sleeping. I want him to feel happy and safe in bed. I also want to be with him but I just couldn't sleep and needed to get up. I'm so used to being by myself and not going to bed till midnight 8am is so early!
Today he was driving and was scaring me a bit because of how he was nervous with stuff (BAG) was in the road. I just want to give him support. I hate that he is going to have to leave again in 2 weeks. UGH. He only has 6 months left over there unless he gets extended. I've missed him so much and am so happy he's home. We have had a great day together.
2007-03-26 16:45:23 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Military
ATTENTION- I SAID 8 AM BUT MEANT 8 PM AND 9PM ETC.
2007-03-26 16:46:46 · update #1
It will be fine, my wife told me I was saying some weird stuff in my sleep too when I was on R&R. He will be fine, just work with him, dont get angry or make fun of him. Its tough to transition so fast and for only a short amount of time. When they briefed us, they told us try to have your spouse drive around for you, it will be much safer. Hey I am pushing for you guys on the not getting extended part, we were and it sucked! Good luck!
2007-03-26 17:02:15 · answer #1 · answered by Jopa 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
This R&R is just for 2 weeks. I know how you feel. My husband was 2 times in Iraq, from his second tour he is back on Semptember 2006. It's still hard for me. He having problems sleeping, he is up almost the whole night, yelling, unhappy. This all call PTSD. I can imagine, what they doing there and what are they seeing. Also it's hard for us, we was doing everything along and now somebody there telling us what to do. Anyway don't let him drive. Just be try normal and don't get upset. We all having this problems. If he come back after 6 months and watch him, and if some problems you find out didn't change he need to get some help. This is another problem, my husband saying all the time "I'm not crazy". This is another thing. So don't worry so much and enjoy the little time with your husband. I wish you both good luck....
From Overseas..
2007-03-27 06:05:40 · answer #2 · answered by cat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depending on what kind of guy he is.. He'll either be harder to adjust to noone shooting at him and being on guard all the time or he'll be ecstatic and jump your bones as soon as he gets settled in. What you want to plan depends on how he reacts to being back in the US.Ive seen guys that come back and have a hard time adjusting but then some guys that come back and it was like they never left. What Im saying is wear some sexy underwear under some nice but casual clothes. Clean house, romantic dinner. Nothing too much in case he has a hard time adjusting but nothin too little so you still have that cute romantic evening ;) He will just be happy he's home with you darlin. Dont overthink it. After the first couple of days ya'll should go out to a Christmas light festival or snowboarding.
2016-03-17 02:54:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, I am a Viet Nam Vet. When I got home I was worse.
I am diagnosed with PTSD chronic and severe. I have had to live with it day and night for 37 years. They have me on two different happy pills a day, see my shrink every 2 months, don't trust anyone. Some people are worse and some are better, just depends on what they went through.
Most of the things that affected my nerves were over in a few months but some things, like nightmares have stayed around.
His driving and other things will get better soon after he gets back, but expect some changes to be permanent.
Get him to a VA hospital and in to a PTSD clinic as soon as possible, at least as soon as he will go.
Want to know more, email me at flmave520at yahoo.com notice I spelled the at
2007-03-26 17:13:46 · answer #4 · answered by Kye H 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry too much. He only JUST got back. It takes a little while for them to adjust to the home pace of life.
My husband had dreams about Iraq for a little while after he got back too. He would wake me up and say all kinds of crazy stuff thinking I was his gunner and asleep on the job. Didn't mean he had PTSD, though. (Thank goodness!)
I say, be glad he's worried about stuff in the road. That means he's highly alert when he's on patrol!
Very glad that you're able to spend some time with him. Enjoy your two weeks!
(He'll get used to the time change in another day or so.)
Take care.
2007-03-26 17:44:53 · answer #5 · answered by fredonia 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this hun, but all of us military wives who have our men go over do. Depending on the type of man your husband was before he went really depends on what kind of support he needs. You're not going to get him to stop having dreams right away and you're not going to get him to stop being "jumpy" right away either.
Just as an example my husband and I were married on Jan 1st of this year. He had come back from his 2nd tour in Iraq in August with both of his buddies who were his groomsmen in our wedding. The night before our wedding was New Years, but my family couldnt understand why we all refused to go down to the bay and see the fireworks (we were married in San Francsico, and my family has never had anything to do with military). In other words, they had been home for almost 6 months, but knew there might be a chance the fireworks would be a trigger.
Life will come back together slowly when he is home for good, as long as you have the strength to tough it out. He will never be exactly the same, but with your support he will come around. You cant blame him for being distant, or get mad for him not being the same, you just have to make it work. If you make it through the bad now, it will make the good times even better.
YOU will need support too. Your best support is your sister military combat wives, becuse your husband cant handle the strain of knowing that he's different or worring you. I'm not going to tell you any of this is easy, but if you ever need ANYTHING, email me.
Best of luck, God Bless, and Semper Fi.
2007-03-26 17:50:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The main thing is for you to be happy he is home and just listen to him and what he wants dont tell him he's crazy for driving like that just ask if he would be more comfortable if you drove. And dont think he's going too be crazy, yeah he's been through a lot but just be glad you still got him i knew a lot of people that wont be coming back when I do. P.S. i dont think he will get extended! And for gods sake dont listen to thees crazy people that say he's going to be messed up in the head for all the crazy stuff he saw! Im no crazyer than when I first joined the Marine corps 2 years ago! Just ask my wife.
2007-03-27 00:25:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
As much as that may seem very uncomfortable for you. The fact that he's doing these things shows that his mind is still there and he's still watching out for his safety which he is going to need when he goes back. He's only going to be home for a little while so give him support and be happy that he is watching out for his safety because his awareness is what's going to bring him home in 6 months. God Bless.
2007-03-26 16:52:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I don't have experience with this, so take my advice or leave it....I think in a case like this you want to be supportive, while giving him space at the same time. Reassure him that you are and always will be there for him and that you just want him to feel like he can talk to you about what he did over there...if he wants to. You sound like a very supportive, smart woman....you'll get through this with him.
2007-03-26 16:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by idog 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It one of those after-war shock, it seems to me that your husband is not in much serious shock state. A couple of weeks and he'll be fine but if it get too serious it might be best to find a therapist. It just like some veterans after Vietnam War.
2007-03-26 17:42:00 · answer #10 · answered by gunslingerroses 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋