Okay so ive been with my bf for 7 months and i feel like we have no trust in our relationship. he's always asking me if im cheating or who im running around on him with. i believe he askes me this cause i admitted to cheatin on ex's before him. i havnt cheated on him and havnt wanted to. he dosent understand how i was a cheater before and how all of a sudden i stopped when we started dating. i told him it was because i was immature and now i know what i want, im ready to settle down with him. my friends tell me that i shouldnt put up with the constant distrust since i havnt done anything wrong. so the big question is do i stay with the man i love and continue to put up with him not trusting me or give up and struggle to let go for several months? just looking for some insight.
2007-03-26 15:41:41 · 8 answers · asked by chickabee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Men r like this.
u have to build trust with love slowly, if u really love this man
otherwise dnt waste time
2007-03-26 15:46:50 · answer #1 · answered by Wondrer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's been 7 months, and thats a decent amount of time. I understand that he's a bit nervous, coz guys can be VERY insecure about some other guy comming along & strealing their "fire." He know's you've cheated in the past & since he apparently is a bit insecure w/ himself, he's convinced you'll cheat on him, too. I say, sit him down & have a hear-to-heart. Explain how much you love him, & that you've moved past that stage of your life. Reiterate the fact that, that was back when you were immature & didnt know what you wanted. Now, you've grown up & know what you want: HIM!!! Let him know that the constant distrust & questioning is hurting your feelings & that you want him to truly trust you. Be gentle & understanding. The poor guy is just afraid to lose you, hon. But, after a good productive heart-to-heart, the questions & distrust do not stop, then, I'm sorry to say, I would let him go. If your putting all this effort into the relationship to only be rewarded w/ mistrust & suspicion, then it's obvious that he can't let it go & you deserve to be treated w/ love & respect for being faithful. Best of luck!
2007-03-26 22:50:12 · answer #2 · answered by Spiral_Dancer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The big answer is: you continue to put up with his not trusting you rather than just give up and possibly let go of a great thing. Although you haven't wronged him, your past history clearly makes him uncomfortable. There's nothing wrong with this - it's a sign that he's serious about you and wants things to work out, otherwise he probably wouldn't be too concerned. And although you don't personally owe him this type of patience, since like I said, you haven't wronged him, it's a great way to show him you're 100% devoted and different than you used to be. It's a great way of showing him he's made an impact on you to change you for the better that no one else really ever made. So, yeah. Be patient. Put up with it. Times tells all... and after an alotted amount of time passes and things run smooothly, he'll see there's nothing to worry about and the trust will start to develop. It may even make your relationship stronger than if the trust were just there from the beginning like in most relationships - this way, the trust was built from the beginning. That's hard to top!
2007-03-26 22:49:27 · answer #3 · answered by shellj_foxy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been where you are before and i know its very complicated. You really need to sit this guy down and tell him what's up. If he cant understand where you are coming from then maybe he isnt ready for the relationship. He should understand that you only want to be with him, and since you say that you havent given him a reason to think youre cheating he just may be really insecure. So if you really want to save the relationship you might have to go out on a limb and prove yourself but if your tired of the accusations then keep movin!!
2007-03-26 22:49:49 · answer #4 · answered by SouthernSweetie07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry, this jelous situation will go away,
he thinks you are too good looking for him, I guess.
be nice with him and reasure how much you love him.
when ever he come to you with a jelous question tell him how good of a man he is. if he ever bring your pass tell him how stupid your ex was how mean, selfish, ugly, unrespectfull.
I hoped I help!!!
2007-03-26 22:48:40 · answer #5 · answered by ups2005 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't think he doesn't understand, then help him understand by telling him that things are different. If he keeps doing the same thing, then it probably isn't worth it.
2007-03-26 22:46:24 · answer #6 · answered by Jeff E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to have TRUST. If he don't believe you yhan maybe you should not see each other for awhile. there'a a saying,If you love someone let them go, If they come back it was meant to be, if not it was never meant to be yours.I don't know if this helps.
2007-03-26 22:53:43 · answer #7 · answered by floralgirl1960 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you love him ask him what do you need to do or prove to him that your not cheating.
2007-03-26 22:58:30 · answer #8 · answered by Babydoll 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋