does divorce warp the children and cause them to be mixed up about life and things?

Question

it seem that divorce affect the children , and bring sadness and a gloom and shadow of a life of dissapointment , to the poor child that see his parents not together anymore and something inside the child never heals from this hurt....in my opinion there is no worst hurt in the human perspective than what divorce does to Children... sadest thing is how tramatic divorce affect the llittle children.. i hope God can find mercy for those who have divorced by selffish motives on either part...

Answer 1

It needs to be handled properly. You just can't pray this away to the big myth in the sky and expect the kids to be ok. Reality calls for real, centered people to be there for the kids, without bringing any more boogeymen into the picture....

Answer 2

the sadness comes from the parents not the divorce. If the parents were to handle the ending of the marriage without emotional baggage being placed upon the children then the Childern will grow up to be healthy adults.

It is agreed by all that children should not be placed in the middle of their divorcing parents. When parents remember that their children have their own feelings, ideas, desires and the freedom to receive love from both parents and express love for both parents the child adjustment will be easier and transition into adult relationships. To help these children should have their own questions answered honestly about the changing family relationships.

To insure the children of divorcing parents have as little stress as possible starts at the beginning. Since most children receive little or no preparation for their parents’ separation their parents should take the time together to explain the situation. This will eliminate the child from providing their own explanations, many times thinking that they had done something wrong. When explaining to the child the parents should show a united front, to show the child they are still his/her parents. There should not be any intimate details for the reasons for divorce. Inform the child that the decision was not made lightly and no one is to blame. Explain how the divorce will affect the child’s daily life. Although a divorce will be traumatic to a child if the parents realize the best interest of the child it will be happier. For this parents should promote your children’s relationship with their other parent, limit the number of changes your children face in the first year, do not threaten your child to control their behavior with the other parent, prepare your children for your social life, and most of all pay attention to your child.

Divorce does not have to damage the children permanently, the vast majority of children are beginning to function reasonably again. If children are raised in a loving and caring environment they can grow up to have happy and healthy relationships.

Answer 3

I think in alot of cases, divorce is the better option for the parents as well as the children if home life has become strained and horrible, unless it (divorce) is handled incorrectly by the parents it will not hurt the children at all.

It is the way the parents relate to each other when apart that will affect the children either positively or negatively... the same way it would when they were together, if the child sees fighting are they not going to fight?

Answer 4

Well i personally would rather have a happy single parent then two parents that fight all the time. Sometimes you can't work things out. My parents FINALLY divorced when i was 18. Even I knew their marriage was over for years. Not long ago my Mom told me we all would have been better off leaving with no money. Now i am happily married with 2 children and see she was right.Dysfunctional families bring sadness and gloom not divorce.

Answer 5

A "baby boomer", born in 1950, I can tell you, society has changed ALOT in the past several decades. Divorce is only one symptom of this.
To be a little child in this time has got to be the most confusing and emotional scarring experience there could be. Nothing is permanent, nothing is sacred, nothing has any depth or root to it, how can the kid know whether the world he knew when he went to bed will be the same when he wakes up?
And it's only getting worse.

Answer 6

This only happens if the parents do not work hard to ensure their children know that Mom and Dad are still their parents, and will always work together to raise them. I have two children, and am divorced. My children show no signs of what you are talking about. My ex and I work very hard to make them understand that even though mommy and daddy do not live together, we are still their parents.

And, I somehow do all this while not believing in your god.

Answer 7

I am divorced and have 2 children, now adults and the divorce never affected them, but I know some children it does

Answer 8

i find that children of a divorced home feel they can do whatever they want. i have seen it many times: one parent yells or says no and the child(ren) just use the other parent. "you say no, but mom will say yes" it pins one parent against each other and often times parents try to one up the other, so the children turn out thinking they can get everything they want and do whatever. and no parent wants to be the bad guy and they don't want to hear "fine, i don't have to listen to you, i'll live with dad" so i think divorce really affects kids.

Answer 9

My mother only stayed with my father because of me and my siblings. I think I am the only normal one and I joing the army and worship trees!!! It was more harm to us that we watched our parents have unhealthy a really unhealthy relationship. I honestly think we would have been better off if they had gone their seprate ways and gotten a divorce. Them staying together hurt us more mentally than a divorce. At least then we would have understood that they didn't like each other instead of them holding the whole fact they were together was because of us like they did. It almost made us feel like it was our fault that they had to be with each other sometimes.

Answer 10

Yes, divorce is hard on kids, but on the other hand so is a miserable love-less marriage. When I left my first husband, I called my daughter to tell her. (She was in her 20s, so she wasn't a youngster) I said "Sweety, sit down. I need to tell you something. I am leaving your dad." She responded "Its about f***ing time!" We talked for a long time. She told me she knew all her life how bad our marriage was and could never figure out why I stayed. Our staying together didn't do her any good at all.