I made a huge mistake about a month ago and cheated on my boyfriend (one time thing, will NEVER do it again). Before you think I am a horrible person let me explain myself... I am 20 and my boyfriend is 25. There was a month were I was unhappy and felt like I was too young to be tied down, i never really not wanted to be with him i just felt really confused. He is amazing, treats me well. Recently through word of mouth, his friend found out and told him. I have been crying and denying it because if I tell him, he'll never speak to me again. I have never regretted anything so much or felt so guilty in my life.
2007-03-26 10:14:05 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds as if you really feel bad about cheating on your boyfriend and you plan on never letting it happen again. I see no point in telling him. What purpose would telling him be? I admit honesty in relationships is important, but you also have to see if you tell him you run the risk of losing him. You are human, you made a human mistake, as long as you do not repeat it, then leave it alone. Otherwise you will be telling him just to ease your guilt and it will only cause him unnecessary pain and heartache. Best of luck to you!
2007-03-26 10:22:22 · answer #1 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If he was so amazing and treated you so well, then why were you unhappy for a whole month? Try telling him what you just told us; it was a huge mistake and you felt really confused because you felt you were too young to be tied down and you've never regretted anything so much or felt so guilty in your life.
Start with that, then let him take it from there to react however he wants to. He may not let you get away with this behavior, and he's well within his rights to end this relationship. If he does, then you had it coming, so learn from it and move on. If he decides to continue the relationship, then you'll be walking on egg shells until you EARN his trust back and can prove that you deserve him.
He already knows what happened, and probably feels more hurt that he had to hear it from his friend instead of you. That doesn't demonstrate a great deal of confidence or trust in him to let you speak the words you need him to hear. Be happy and thankful if he takes you back, and don't count on an opportunity to make a third mistake. You won't get one.
2007-03-26 10:30:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have repeatedly lied to your BF. You lied when you cheated. You lied every time you said you didn't. You lied to yourself with the excuses you used to cheat. So what if you felt that you were too young, it was your decision. So what if you felt down, everybody does occasionally. These are nothing more than handy excuses for getting caught up in the moment and then trying to justify it to yourself. There were two adults there, you were one of them.
I too would run away and never talk to you again. Not for cheating, that can and does happen, but for repeatedly lying about it. If you have lie, upon lie, and you do, why should I believe that you wouldn't do it again?
2007-03-26 10:24:21 · answer #3 · answered by ttpawpaw 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're right to feel guilty, now stop wasting his time and move on. You obviously don't love him or you wouldn't have done this, if you do then you made the biggest mistake of your life because historically relationships just don't last through things like that unless it was a very long marriage or something like that. Tell him, and deal with it.
2007-03-26 10:20:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be honest with him and hope for the best. It will not be easy, but if you continue to lie to him, even if your relationship continues, you will have that constant cloud hanging over the relationship. You need to tell him what happened and explain why, if he will listen to you. He may need time away from you to sort things out. He may stay with you. It all depends. If he does decide to leave you, just let it be a lesson to you in future relationships. It is best to talk to your loved one about how you are feeling before you just go ahead and cheat on them. My heart bleeds for you...i know you are in a lot of pain. Hang in there. Time will make it fade, but you must never forget. Best wishes!
2007-03-26 10:24:18 · answer #5 · answered by fair blue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may as well tell him, he knows anyway! If you were confused about things you should have spoken to him, not shagged someone else. You did wrong, however bad you feel you're in the wrong. Do the decent thing and tell the truth. If he dumps you, you've learnt the hard way. However guilty you feel it doesn't change the fact that it's your fault.
Sorry if it sounds harsh, but it's very true.
2007-03-26 10:22:15 · answer #6 · answered by littlebethan 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him because he deserves to know the truth. Lying to him is only gonna make it worst. Sit him down and explain to him what happened and why you did it and tell him that it was a mistake and it will never happen again. Keeping it from him will hurt him even more so just tell him.
2007-03-26 10:20:42 · answer #7 · answered by Lil Zo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop excusing your bad behavior. If you didn't want to be tied down you should have broken up with him instead of stringing him along until you figured it out. How would you feel if he did that to you? Tell him the truth and hope he can forgive you.
2007-03-26 10:21:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you cheated, you don't need to be with anyone. I know you care about this person (duh, you're crying) but if I were you - which I'm not, but if I were; I would just be single. You're confused, and that's normal at our age (I'll be 20 in June). Enjoy the single life, and when you're ready, and if he's available - try again.
2007-03-26 10:20:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
one million. i found out as we communicate that I would desire to pay for my first semester of school out of pocket. 2. i'm undecided if i visit break up with my boyfriend. 3. I nevertheless have not chanced on suitable complete time employment yet.
2016-11-23 17:32:29 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋