Should I let her date?

Question

my daughter will be 13 next month and I was wondering if I should let her start dating...even though I think she already has started, She is really social and she is always hanging out with boys and girls who cling to each other and I have seen her hug some of the boys in her 'clique'....should I let her date?

Answer 1

Group dating may be fine but one on one dating she is way to young.

Answer 2

A lot depends on the age of the boy she wants to date. If he's 13, maybe. If he's 16, no way.

I think 13 is too young. I studied marketing and advertising in college and kids 11-13 are a salesman's dream because they haven't learned how to distinguish between a sales pitch and the truth yet. They're very impressionable at that age. Two more years can make a HUGE difference, at 15 they become more skeptical about what people tell them and less likely to believe some horny boy when he tells them he'll love them forever.

The growing amount of 12 and 13 year old girls on yahoo answers posting questions regarding their pregnancy would seem to back me up on this. They're not bad girls, they just made a mistake, which 13 year olds are prone to do. I'd tell her she can go out with her friends, group dates, or maybe even a double date, but I'd not let her go out with one boy alone for another year or two.

Answer 3

Going out with a group is one thing. Dating is another. She is way too young to date. Dating is very serious and it's baggage that she is not yet able to handle, even if "all of her friends are doing it". As a parent you should never push or allow your child to enter into a situation that they probably are not old enough to handle. My husband and I allowed our daughter to start going out with groups of friends at about 12 or 13, to the mall, bowling, the local pizza place, a friends house,etc. But she was not allowed to start dating (being alone with a boy anywhere) until she was 16. By that time we had had opportunities to talk with her about things of the world and believed that she was old enough to start handling some of them. She's 19 now and in her first year of college and so far so good. She has demonstrated really good responsibility when choosing her friends and dates. Also, we always made sure we know who she was with and made sure the other parents were aware of their children's activities too.

Answer 4

Have some fun activities at your house and invite all her friends. If she has a boyfriend, he's sure to show up. Do something like a water balloon fight or a BBQ. Something where your daughters friends and possibly boyfriends get comfortable coming to her house often. Then, I think it's fine to let her date if you know the boys well. I started dating at 15, but my boyfriend was always with my parents and me.

Answer 5

I personally think that 13 is too young to start actually dating. I think its ok to have kids go out as a group at that age... but as far as a one on one date??? I personally think that 15-16 years is a better age to really start letting kids date. Give them time to learn a little bit more about themselves and the consequences of making unwise decisions.

Answer 6

As a 20 year old mommy of two, I would say yes, but under the right supervision. Kids are going to find some way to do what they want. If you shelter them, they will rebel. Take it from me. Suggest double dates with friends, and set a cerfew. Or take the two of them to the mall and allow them to hang out there for a bit, then pick them up. She will be an adult before you know it, and will be doing her own thing. Put a little trust in her to do the right thing. If she fails, tighten the rope a bit. It is all a game of giving and taking. Just dont allow her to take to much, as some teens tend to do.

Answer 7

I think as long as it is group dates or supervised dates. My daughter started dating around 13, but they've all been group dates to the mall and movies or bowling. I think the most important thing is letting your daughter know the ground rules before dating and sticking to those rules.

Answer 8

I think 13 is too young for actual dating. Supervised outings with a group of friends is more appropriate. If it were my daughter, I'd probably say she should be 16 before dating other than with supervised groups.

Answer 9

13 is awfully early to allow dating. Your daughter has her entire life ahead of her and just a very short time left to enjoy the innocence of childhood.
Group events that are chaperoned are ok but at 13 she should have a reasonable curfew and plenty of supervision.

Answer 10

13 is way too young to date in my opinion. My father wouldn't let us date until we were 16 and we had to bring the boys over to have dinner for our parents to meet FIRST. I think this set up was ideal. We didn't grow up as fast I think... a good thing.

Answer 11

Yes, but with some supervision most of the time. Kids are doing a lot more at a lot younger age and you need to educate her about risks and how to protect herself. I'm not saying she is going to go out and have sex, but it will happen eventually and dating is headed in that direction. Good communication is the key. Good Luck.