My fiancee son has downs how do I cope with him moving in with us?

Answer 1

Let me tell you something ... my sister in law has Downs, and honestly, as difficult as this is to believe, my mother in law has told me on several occasions (and I have been able to see it for myself) that she was the easiest child to raise out of all of them. True, there are different degrees of Downs and every child is different, but unlike "normal" children, you don't have to worry about them getting "into" trouble. They are for the most part, obedient, and although they can be stubborn, over all, they are quite a joy to have, because they're special. and they are some of the most loving people. I'm sure you'll be fine.

Answer 2

Talk with his father. Let him take the lead in setting up the home. And ask him what his son's specific needs are and what his expectation of you are. He may not want you getting too involved, or he may expect you to take on the role of house mother. You need to know up front and decide if you are willing to be in that position for the rest of the boy's life. Remember, whenever it get hard or tired, you have to face the fact that you knew what you were getting into from the beginning. This kid is never going to be independent. Are you OK with that? This will impact your savings, your vacations, family holidays, etc for the rest of the boy's life. And he will likely have medical expense.
Do you get along with the kid? Does he like you. You don't mention how high functioning he is or his relationship with his mother. And how much of a role does his mother play? Will you have to deal with her often? Do you get along with her? What if she were to criticize your housekeeping or parenting skills? How would you react?
And what about kids of your own? Do you want any? Does your finance?

Don't think I'm against it. More power to you for even thinking about it. For me, it's more than I could take.

Answer 3

Just take it slowly to see what kind of kid he is,,,find something that you like to do 'so if you start to get stressed you can go and do it' like crossword puzzles or reading a book..most of down kids are really sweet and will go out of their way to be good and try to please their elders....It;s going to be different as you have never had him living with you and your fiancee,,,,Hopefully his mom can take him on the weekends so you can get that well deserved break you;ll need to take....good luck to you..

Answer 4

Go to your public library and read all you can. Knowledge is the key here and ask yourself this question, Am i ready for this huge responsibility??? Good luck!!!

Answer 5

if your son is old enough to get married, he is likely old enough to get his own place.

i'll never understand parents who let their kids' boyfriends/girlfriends just move right in, bag and baggage.