Does anyone else have an out of control toddler and how do you handle it?

Question

My 19 month old has recently picked up some really bad habits, such as hitting, bitting and kicking. I was wondering how I can handle her behavior or how other people handle their toddlers behavior. I know its a phase but, I just wanted to know.

For Lui, not its not bad parenting, this is the first time my daughter has EVER acted like that at home. She NEVER acted that way until she moved over to the 2 yr old class at her day care. She does has time outs and I disipline her. I know she is testing boundaries. I wanted to know how other parents handled it, I KNOW how to handle MY daughter.

Answer 1

You ,my dear, are entering the terrible 2 stage...I am a mother of 2 teenage girls and I remember those days very well....seems like yesterday....I am a firm believer in spanking...some however are not.....you can spank her (at her age a light pop on the hand or bottom) or put her in time out....but always explain to her what she did wrong and why she is being punished and have her apologize to whomever she has done this too afterwards...if she can't say I'm sorry...then teach her those words...never yell at your child....even though they are little ,they are people too...they may not know what we know but they are learning everyday....and the kind of mother you are being ....is the kind of mother she is learning to be to her children someday....talk to her...calmly, with love and teach her the values and morals that will make her someone to look up too.....these days everyone comes from disfunctional families...look at how your parents raised you ,if they made mistakes ...make it a point in your parenting to improve on that...unfortunately children do not come with instruction manuals....we all make mistakes...the important thing is to always try to remember you are shaping and molding the mindset of this little person with every decision you make...you know her better than anyone....you will find what works for the 2 of you..Children will test their boundries until they are grown....BUT ALWAYS BE CONSISTANT....and at her age patience is a must.....best wishes and good luck!!

Answer 2

OK first of all you have to get down to the child's level look directly in the eyes talk to him to why he is doing this and if this continues he will be on a naughty mat, also you can try a reward system, if he can go a day without any bad habits he will be rewarded make a poster with placing stars for the good behavior and when he is bad you will place a cross.

Answer 3

Well I also have an out of control 3 year old who throws all kinds of fits. It is according to how I handle it as to where we are. If we are in the store or mall I will just look at her like she is crazy and will probably give in to what she wants. But when we get the car I yell at her or pop her on her butt. If we are at home I throw the same tantrum that she is throwing and she will stop and look at me like I am crazy and she won't do it anymore. If we are at church I will just make her go sit with one of her aunts she doesnt like and that will make her stop. What you have to do is just know you child--like the old saying goes -- I will act a fool wherever you act a fool. And my daughter being 3 already knows that I am not joking about that.

Answer 4

Well, my son is 19 months old, he hit me on my hand once, and I realized..hmmmmm might be because I keep popping his hand so I stopped. But she has to be learning this behavior from somewhere. I think getting down to her level and in a stern voice (no yelling) you tell her no, do not do that. Or if she understands timeout, try that, or taking things away. It's kind of hard with a child that young. The only thing my child does now is say nah uh and runs. Just be patient, but show her it will not be tolerated. But also sometimes if she is having a tantrum, I wouldn't say one word to her because she just wants you to say something, I noticed my sons tantrums stop when we completely ignore him.

Answer 5

Well unlike what everyone said, i thinking spanking {and i don't mean beating your child} just a firm pop on the butt, leg or hand will work. If your child bites, bite him back. Show him that it hurts. Explain to him that he has hurt you and thats why you hurt him. Otherwise he's not going to understand why you are getting mad at him. Neither one of my children bit me {other than playing} but they did have their tantrums and still do. And most of the time they cry it out, but when they turn violent. Towards you, older/younger siblings, or even the pet. you need to take control of it and if it continues you might want to talk to your doctor about it because it may be more than a tantrum, or a terrible two stage

Answer 6

It's not a phase it's poor parenting. It's not really your fault because you thought it was a phase.

Point is you need to stop this now before it becomes anything beyond a phase. Your child is looking for boundaries, if you don't set them she'll continue to seek them.

So use time outs, if she hits, time out time. Don't give in. The behaviour will stop very fast.

You need to punish bad behaviour with time outs, and reward good behaviour with lots of attention. If you give attention for bad behaviour, it can lead to a mixed message. Even negative attention is attention after all.

So go for time outs, they work the best.

Answer 7

I unquestionably have a 2 year old and a a million year old so I thoroughly experience your discomfort!!! i replaced into under pressure while i replaced into pregnant and my oldest replaced into in basic terms 18months old once I had my 2d new child. My well being practitioner instructed me that obtaining disillusioned and under pressure is thoroughly general once you're pregnant with the aid of hormone adjustments. in case you're under pressure then the toddler feels the rigidity inspite of the undeniable fact that it's not something to agonize approximately. in basic terms end what you're doing, take a deep breath and loosen up. i detect the final thank you to deal with my 2 year old at this element is to redirect him instead of having pissed off with him. There interest span at that age is constrained so yelling at him particularly does not get you everywhere becaue they overlook what you're yelling at them for after a jiffy and then they are at it lower back. If my 2 year old desires discipline I often in basic terms attempt and redirect him with yet another useful pastime to distract from however he wasn't meant to be doing. That saves us the two an excellent variety of time and rigidity. Now that my youngest is one and that they are the two teaming up on me this little trick is on the market in especially obtainable. provide it a attempt. good success and enable me know in case you % to objective it out. Congrats on your being pregnant!!!

Answer 8

my daughter started that phase but didnt get past 2 days with it

time out worked wonders for her
but anytime she pulls hair or bites i do it back (just enough to hurt a little and get my point across)

your child probably doesnt understand that it hurts and once that's figured out will probably stop

Answer 9

i have a almost three year old and he is out of control when he does not get his way! what i do when this happens i go down to his level and look into his eyes and tell him what he did wrong. then i send him to time out in the sofa or to his room. this has helped out for me hopefully this will too for you! right now they are testing their limits and if you let them do whatever then it will get much worse. good luck!

Answer 10

Out of control children always have a reason to be out of control, remember to think about what makes them this way. Is it the kids they play with? What do they watch on television? What do they eat? How much do they sleep? Do you discipline them enough? These questions may come as a shocker to most parents, what a child eats? how much he sleeps? In all actuality, a childs behavior is affected by so many variables it can make a parents head spin. Too much sugar before bed or early in the morning makes children eager to play and jump around and when a parent tells them to stop it's usually a disaster. Try making healthier less sugary treats and breakfasts for your children, Mango slices in the fridge or apple, celery, baby carrots, can all give them energy, but not what I call "Bad energy." Bad energy is the stuff you get from candy and tv, good energy comes from excersize, healthy snacks and constructive time with your child.

Watching who your child plays with is another big issue. I've seen children who join groups against other children at young ages, because of a need for social interaction and acceptance from their age group. Basically, if one of the kids your kid plays with on a regular basis jumps off a bridge, your child is likely to follow. Children have an uncanny way of following other kids that they feel are smarter or have more potential as a leader. Unbelievable? I've seen it happen. A child is ridiculed, and others will follow for acceptance from the one who started it. Think of it as toddler peer pressure. Carefully follow what your children do when they play wiht other children. Are they leader or the follower? Do they behave or misbehave? Usually children don't have the tendency to punish each other when another misbehaves, and the bad behavior goes unpunished, which give the child the idea that he or she can do that when he/she is around a friend or friends and no adult is in sight.

Television shows affect children quite a bit. Ever see what happens when an eleven year old finishes watching Naruto( A japanese show about child ninja)? He jumps around and pretends to be the characters. Students I know in their freshman and sophomore years also do this. They give each other names of the characters, and go around in costumes fromt he show and take on the general role of their favourite action hero. I've seen kids scratch, bite, and yell, and punch all because their "character" did it on Tv. Be sure to monitor what your children watch, make sure you know what age level it is meant for and control what they watch, SLIGHTLY. Don't overdo it.

Sleeping is another variable. If a child doesn't sleep well enough, he will be grunpy and wuicker to snap at his own parents instead of hindering his emotions. Be sure to ask kindly how his ngiht was,a dn see what you can do for any sleep trouble he may have. Can't fall asleep? Get him/her some milk before sleep. Taking a bath before bed or dropping a light scent on their pillow is a good idea too, lavendar and chamomile scents help relax.

Another reason a child will misbehave is that the parents don't do well with discipline. This is,not sorry to say it, BAD. Some parents think a child should be able to learn on their own, which is also, BAD. A child should not be allowed to make life altering descisions until the age of sixteen to seventeen. Children have to have some sort of boundaries. No going out on weeknights, set curfues, chores that aren't too tedious, and punishment when something is done wrong. Not learning that there are consequences for every action you take is not fun for someone as the years go on. A child who learns to speak unkindly of others will most likely end up getting his butt kicked by someone bigger, stronger, and smarter than he is. Making guidlines and rules for a child to follow give them a good I idea of what it means to be a good person. If you feel your not getting through to your child or you and your child get into fights or frequent disaggreements, take a moment to understand where your child is coming from. There is nothing more frustrating than when a child feels he/she is misunderstood. Ask them to explain to you their views,a dn LISTEN. Don't interrupt or your child will be quick to drift off and drop whatever you say to them after the convorsation. Don't yell, talk.