my boyfriend just turned 21 and told me that he just wants a break so he can go out and party without worrying if ill be mad about it but we are still friends. a baby would interfere with his night life and i think it would just be better if he didnt know untill he gets this party phase out of his system
2007-03-26 05:10:10 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The good ole "break but we can be friends" phrase. I hated that phrase because it meant I want to hold on to you while I went out and did what I want to do. Sweetie you have a baby that is growing inside of you that did not choose who's it's parents were going to be. Why are you worried about it interferring with his parting when obviously he was not worried about how you feel when he came up with the break idea. When you decided to give him your body I am sure you did not inticipate him saying ohh we need a break. You should not carry this burden on your own. Him being selfish and thinking of himself about the partying deal will stress you out whether you think it will or not. He needs to know as soon as possible that you are carrying his child and he has now other responsibilities other then just himself. Having a child makes you grow up real fast and now you are going to be missing out on things in your life that you had not planned on so why should he have the easy street and not have to grow up also. Stop putting him first and start putting that baby first.
2007-03-26 05:24:21 · answer #1 · answered by Rigssy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well when will you know when his party phase is out of his system. When guys and girls just turn 21, their party phase could last till their 30. I think you need to tell him now. IT shouldn't matter if a baby will interfere with his party life. You both apparently didn't use protection so you both knew there was a chance of this happening. You need to tell him so you know how to proceed with life. You need to know if he is gonna be in this baby's life or if you are gonna do it on your own or what have you. Sorry but its the truth.
2007-03-26 05:16:26 · answer #2 · answered by Just a girl... 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him.....now. This party phase is not something he is going to do for a couple months and then come back all ready to settle down. He needs to be aware of the situation immediately and decide what he is going to do. Unfortunately, the men have this option whereas the women do not. We both make the babies but regardless of whether the men want to stick around, we are forced to make the hard decisions. I wihs you the best.
2007-03-26 05:15:53 · answer #3 · answered by Clarissa 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't deside for him, if he wants to do that after you tell him than so be it, sounds like you don't have a problem with it else you wouldn't even be thinking about not telling him,
tell him and let him make up his mind on what he wants to do, if he still wants to go out and party so be it, but at least he can't blame you later on in life if he finds out he has a child and never had a chance to be a good daddy and do the right thing, you might be serprised and he might just do the right thing and be there for you and the baby.
good luck
2007-03-26 05:17:17 · answer #4 · answered by dutchcutie68 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Um..if he is the father he has the right to know now! If he just wanted a break from responsibility he shouldn't of had unprotected sex. I am pretty sure he would be angry with you if you didn't tell him, the longer you wait to tell him, the harder it's going to be. Give him a chance to step up to the plate, he can still go out at night. But his child should be his first priority.
2007-03-26 05:15:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you really think that in a maximum of 9 months the party phase will be "out of his system"? Doubtful. Despite his immaturity and probable reluctance to be a parent, you should tell him ASAP. He has a right to know he's about to be a father.
2007-03-26 05:13:58 · answer #6 · answered by Emily B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell him right away! this doesnt mean you have to tell your parents right away, anyway tell your boyfriend now if you havent told him yet cuz then you guys can figure out your plans for the future. and this whole party phase thing can be kicked to the curb because he should realize that haveing a baby to take care of is a bigger responsibility.
2007-03-26 05:19:44 · answer #7 · answered by cassidy m 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
personally I think if it is his child he should take responsibility. you didn't get pregnant all on your own. you'll have to give up part of your life, and it is his obligation to give up part of his. if he's mature enough to have sex, then he should deal with the consequences. too bad if he won't get to go party as much. you need to tell him as soon as you go to the doctor and know for sure you are pregnant. if he doesn't want to help you raise this baby, fine, but make damn sure you get child support money. you shouldn't have to do it all on your own. I really am sorry if I sound harsh, but I've seen too much of girls getting abandoned by boyfriends and it's just not right. men who do that sicken me. I hope that regardless of your boyfriend's behavior you have family and friends that will love and support you.
2007-03-26 05:15:39 · answer #8 · answered by Green-eyed Nikki 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry, but the party phase lasts for YEARS. by the time he has gotten it out of his system, the baby could very well be 10 years old. what are you gonna tell him in the meantime?
2007-03-26 05:22:00 · answer #9 · answered by kittycat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
soon, then you can plan for you and your baby's future. if hes a decent guy, he'l realise his unborn child is more important than a 'stage of life' and he'l do what he can, that might not mean he gets back with you, but hel help financilay and offer support and stuff like that. he may not want to be involved at all. either way, you need to know so you can plan your babys future, and sort yourself out, you dont want lots of drama near the end of your pregnancy, and you can avoid that, or maybe any drama at all, by sorting it out now.
2007-03-26 05:17:59 · answer #10 · answered by bojanglestothemax 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋