2007-03-26 01:47:09 · 13 answers · asked by Carrie ♥ 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Ok you really is going to laugh when i tell you about my gift joke. One day a young man wanted to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart for valentine's day. But they had not been dating very long.After careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note: romantic but not too personal. Accompained by his sweetheart's younger sister, he went to Nordstrom's and bought a pair of white gloves. The sister purchased a pair of panties for herself.
During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got the gloves and the sweetheart got the panties without checking the contents, the young man sealed the package and sent it to his sweetheart with the following note:
''I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the habit of wearing any when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long ones with the buttons but she wears short ones that are easier to remove. These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past 3 weeks and they were hardly soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really small. I wish i was there to put them on for you the first time as no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing. Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year! I hope you will wear them for me every Friday night'' All my love.
P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur showing i hope you love my gift joke.
2007-03-26 02:28:01 · answer #1 · answered by lil boosie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My boyfriend got pulled over by the police. The policeman asked him if he'd been drinking. My boyfriend said that he'd had about 3 pints. The policeman told him that he'd have to breathalize him. When he'd been breathalized the policeman looked at him puzzled because nothing had registered on the meter. He said that he thought he'd said he'd had about 3 pints to which my botfriend replied "yeah that's right. I've had about 3 pints of coke" The policeman wasn't amused and so he scrutinized my boyfriends car. I bet he askes people what they've been drinking and not just how much in the future.LOL
2007-03-26 20:06:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Understanding Women?
One day a man died and went to Heaven. St. Peter
met him and said"I'm really sorry, but it wasn't your turn yet. I am going to grant you a wish and return you to Earth". The man said "You know, I hate flying and boats, so build me a road between California and Hawaii."
St Peter exclaimed "That is a physical imposibility, I can't do it." So the man said "OK, give me the ability to understand women." St. Peter thinks for a moment, and then says "Would you like that 2 or 4 lane?"
2007-03-26 08:51:17 · answer #3 · answered by wildbill05733 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jesus and st. peter up in heaven discussing pollution on earth and wondering what they can do about it.Jesus decides he will come down and have a look for himself. St peter says he will come with him then.When they get here,jesus wants to know what the big pipe is for.
"Its to take all the human waste out to sea and when it`s out there it kills all the dolphins," peter tells him.
"Im not having that !" says jesus.
So he steps onto the waves and begins walking into the water.Peter follows but its not long before he`s knee deep in dirty water.Soon peters up to his neck in sh***y water while jesus is scooting along the top,and jesus is offering no help.
"Master,"he says,"you know i`ll follow you anywhere - but i think im gonna drown.." Jesus stopped,looked down at him,and said,"Well why don`t you just walk on the f***** pipe like me you stupid **** !"
2007-03-26 10:00:58 · answer #4 · answered by yahoobloo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A little boy was sitting in the park one day, stuffing himself with chocolate, when a man came up to him and said "chocolate is bad for you, it rots your teeth, and makes you fat and spotty". The little boy said "my grandad lived to be 100 years old" oh' said the man, "and did he eat a lot of chocolate" No said the little boy, "but he knew how to mind his own f****n buisness".
2007-03-26 09:04:06 · answer #5 · answered by brillo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Something funni?" Are you OK now? No?
Get a star as well!
2007-03-26 09:10:10 · answer #6 · answered by filip 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A wise man is who makes more money than his wife can spend, a wise woman is who finds such a man......
2007-03-26 09:40:52 · answer #7 · answered by Sam- the "big boss" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My manager fell of her chair on Friday!! Ha ha She shouldn't be such a battleax should she! My only regret is that I didn't have my camera with me!
2007-03-26 08:54:38 · answer #8 · answered by DippyGirl78 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
my family finally started letting me cook again, since i have learned that the smoke alarm is NOT the timer.
2007-03-26 09:21:25 · answer #9 · answered by anyone0102 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have three legs, and I cant walk because the middle one is too big.
2007-03-26 08:53:53 · answer #10 · answered by Gabriel G 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋