how can i forgive somebody who have really given pain to me.?

Answer 1

Great question. I would be a hypocrite if I said I don't feel the way you do. It is easier said than done.

Jesus said we should forgive; otherwise, he will also not forgive us. So we really have no choice. I have also learned that when we forgive it is for our own good. It harms us if we are always bitter and resentful.

Peace and every blessing!

Answer 2

Forgiveness is the highest state of mind which develops through suffering with age.
No good work is accomplished without any pains. The best result is a childbirth.
If you can understand that pains are inflicted on you so that you evolve into a better person , the truth about pains can then only be explored.
The person who inflicts pain is only an instrument to do so. The annihilation's in world wars had made us wiser and better. After the world wars were we forgiving or are we conspiring to start another war?
So forgiveness ends the process of hatred.
But these are very philosophical lectures to a young and immature mind . At your stage , if somebody slaps you , it is better to slap him back twice as hard . Otherwise it will bring unnecessary mental conflict in you and may turn you into a coward. If the situation is beyond you , it is better to consult your elders.

Answer 3

You just have to. Everyone, including you, have made mistakes. You must forgive a person for your own well being. You may never forget. Yet, in life we have to make choices on whether to be a victim or a survivor. To be a survivor you must forgive. otherwise, the anger, pain, and hate will eat you up inside.
How can you forgive? That is tough and it may be a long road. It is possible. If you believe in God then you take it to him in prayer and seek his guidance. You can also talk to a pastor or counselor. It depends on the degree of your pain and hurt. Their are some great self help books on forgiveness out there that you may want to read.

Answer 4

Friend,

Think of the pleasant moments you spent with that person.The happiness you experienced anytime with that person.

This pain may be due to misunderstanding, or may be due to that person's bad mood.If you are a real FRIEND you will definitely know whether that somebody really hurt you with intention.

Just smile.Be normal.After some days all will be normal, and this question seems meaningless to you yourself.

We are all humans.some times the tongue slips.But have you not behaved like that earlier with any one.Are you that perfect.we are , some times without our knowledge cause some pain in others.It is life.

So o not lose a good friend.There is no word like forgiveness between friends, if they are really friends.

Hope and wish your friendship grows well.

Good luck and God bless you both.

Answer 5

If you are a Christian, born again by the Spirit of God, - sins forgiven, then you can call on God's help to forgive, and that is by obedience to Him, even though you don't FEEL like forgiving this person.

Say to the Lord, that you know that you need to forgive this person, and that you can't do it in your own strength. Then ask the Lord to help you forgive. As you step out in forgiveness towards that person, then the Lord will meet you - He is faithful in every way!

God bless you!

Answer 6

Forgiveness does not mean that you have to once again be this person's best friend and all is well. Rather it means you move beyond it, you set it aside and keep going.

If this person has hurt you, then let it go, let go of what makes you angry about it and upset ... forgiving is freeing yourself from that burden of carrying around those awful feelings.

It's not easy for us to forgive, we want justice and vengeance. But don't you want blessings even more than justice and vengeance? Don't you want God to heap blessings that are so many that your cup overflows? As soon as you let go of those angry and hurt feelings, the blessings begin. Test the Bible on this and see if it ain't so. :)

Answer 7

You forgive them for your own self, your own well being, in forgiving them you can let go of the hurt and anger and pain. It doesn't mean that you have to be around the person or have any thing to do with them or allow them to hurt you again, you just realize how pathetic that person is and let go of the bad feelings you have.

Answer 8

"You start by forgiving "your self" then the rest will follow. No body gives us pain, "We give it to ourself" it is the way of our culture. It is time to remember "who and what we really are" In the salvation of forgiveness, we must start at home. Once we heal then the others can heal too.

As we put blame to the out side world we become less responsible for our self. "we have been creating our own reality for some time now, and its now time for change"

Answer 9

Follow a simple funda..
If the person has given u immense pain, he/she is just not worth wasting time on...Moreover if u think about him, it will give you further pain.So just forgive and forget..and see to it that he doesnt have any connection with ur life henceforth..
If u react... things will worsen..so just take the whole episode as learning experience in life and move on...
life is beautiful..but short..so dont waste it on pains..instead live it fully..and realize its gains..;)
all the best..:)

Answer 10

It is important to remember, forgiveness is not for that other person - it is for YOU. When we forgive those who may not deserve forgiveness, something very powerful happens. Sometimes we have to approach forgivenses slowly by praying, "God, I want and need to forgive, help me."

When we are wounded and we do not forgive. We are surrendering to that person who caused the hurt. We give them permission to continue troubling us. When we forgive - we don't forget - but we do receive healing from God. God gives us a new perspective.

We are commanded by Jesus in the scriptures to forgive, so that our prayers will not be hindered. God knows how hard it is sometimes for us to forgive. Ask for His help.

Remember forgiveness is for us, not for the ones who hurt us.