my cousin lived with us for 12mos And then i noticed my husband and i was not having sex anymore. they spent a lot of time together, my cousin came to live with us because her parent was not providing for her, he would help her with home work, take her to school and pick her up. i would go to work everyday my husband didn't work neither did she for the first 7 mos. my cousin is very nonconfrontational, weak, easy to manpula. so my husband use to be up late with her doing homework or talking about her teen problem and i would be sleep. 3 nights out of 5. so one night i woke up and he was sitting on her bed and she was in his lap crying, with her underware on. i asked what was going on he said he was comforting her , her friend was pregnant and she feel bad for her friend because she did't know what to do. so i ask y r u in her room and she had on biking shorts and her bra. he said that he see her as a child so it never cross his mind, hus 37, im 28, cousin 18. he said she is his kid
2007-03-25
22:46:29
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19 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
Gee, I dont know what to think...it could go either way. Maybe he does see her as a kid and the thought of sex with her hasnt even entered his mind. Or maybe something has happened between them. Considering you didnt have sex with your husband while your cousin was there seems pretty suspicious to me. I tend to agree with one answerer who said he should not have been the one to comfort her when she was in her bedroom and half naked....he should have woken you up to go and help her out. Whether or not anything happened between the two of him, he was very stupid to put himself in a position to compromise himself. She could have called rape at any time and your marriage would have been over and his reputation shot to pieces. If something has happened between them, then it kinda gives me a sick feeling in my tummy because its very close to sexual abuse considering the age of your husband and the age of your cousin.....maybe even a little incestuous.
Something similar happened in my family and it still brings a sick feeling to my stomach at the though....and just reading this question gave me the same kind of feeling.....so if gut instincts are anything to go by, then I think he has taken advantage of the girl.......she was vulnerable, and you said she is weak and easy to manipulate. If she is that weak and as easy to manipulate as you say, then I think it will be easy to get the truth out of her.
Maybe you have to confront her and say "I know something happened between you and my husband, and you have one chance to tell me the truth, or I will be taking it further" Maybe frighten her into telling you the truth. If you confront her as if you know something then you will be more inclined to get the truth out of her out of fear. Dont ask her.....tell her and you will know by her reaction if she is telling the truth or not. Put a bit of pressure on and you will soon find out the truth. She is the best one to confront because she is young and vulnerable. When you find out the truth, then will be the time to confront your husband.
Its a really irky situation you are in, and I know you wouldnt be feeling too confident. I think you already know the answer...you just have to hear it from her lips.
I feel for your situation, I really do. Its not nice to find out your husband is not the trusworthy guy you once thought he was. Your whole perception of who your husband is, has dramatically changed. You need to find out the truth, and put the puzzel together one way or the other.
2007-03-25 23:08:51
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answer #1
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answered by rightio 6
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Your husband is displaying classic emotional (and actual) indications of untreated ED. i recognize from very own adventure. The source must be the drugs and changing to a clean and diverse style of drugs would in all likelihood clean up the challenge. yet after all he desires to be sure a urologist and probable an endocrinologist. Testosterone tiers in adult males ought to exceed seven hundred ng/dl to maintain generic sexual activities. Low testosterone could additionally impression adult males emotionally over and above the rigidity he's in all likelihood experiencing. Now... His proclamations approximately your chum and sister is in all likelihood over reimbursement for his loss of sexual ability (in his innovations). None-the-much less appreciate his honesty. it may exhibit a actual actual concern yet whether it would not have a actual reason, this type reaction to his honesty is a demonstration the two one among you concern chatting with one yet another approximately intimate themes (whether intercourse isn't the midsection of communicate). the two one among you need to artwork on communique. yet.. finding at this yet in any different case would advise that one or the two one among you need to % that the attempt isn't worth it. Answerers at YA, can assist you to recognize and perchance grant a diverse perspective, yet think approximately some thinking and speaking along with your husband to do.
2016-10-01 12:17:55
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answer #2
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answered by linnon 4
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From what you have said it is already enough for you to be worried and in your eyes you already suspect them .Always go for what your gut tells you !! I think you should try and catch them in the act at the time you feel is the best to catch them !! She isn't a child and if it is happening kick them both out he is a disgusting pig and she is a horrible person for going there !! There are limits to where your husband and her should go and they are breaking everyone of them and your working to support them both !! You don't deserve it or need to tolerate it !!! Be strong and start fighting for your rights as the adult in this sad situation and don't let your husband off lightly and remember always it takes two they are both to blame !!!!!! Good luck and remember from me to you is very easy to forgive but extremely hard to forget !! And i hope you dont have little girls of your own :( !!
2007-03-25 23:16:08
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answer #3
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answered by yoursandmine05 2
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I think she's alittle too old to be in your husband's lap. I don't know if sex has occured, but I wouldn't discount it. Just ask her for the truth. Better still, I'd ask both of them at the same time, say at the dinner table...It may seem somewhat uncomfortable, but at least you may get an honest answer.
2007-03-25 23:23:23
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answer #4
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answered by gone 6
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Never mind the question, what about the answer?
If it's yes what are you going to do, and if no.
Most 37 year old guys would love to do it with her, but they would also settle on just talking to a young pretty girl, but while he thinks sex, she's thinking "father figure"
If you think your better off without him, dump him. If not, get over it.
2007-03-25 23:20:19
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answer #5
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answered by Mrs Love Canada 3
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if you really want to find out the answer, you can try to give them a surprise, like you tell them u are going out to whatever place and will come back home late tonight , and juz to make a surprise show up and see if they are really cheating or not. One main point is try to be stupid anytime and then they will think u are stupid but actually u are not. try to get their a ss kick one time
2007-03-25 22:53:20
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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I'll ask your cousin if she slept with him right after she finishes sucking my c o c k. Okay, she said your husband taught her to do it real good and she's telling the truth.
2007-03-26 01:30:54
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answer #7
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answered by Jose F 1
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You may never know the truth.
Watch them when they are together, there will be signs of romantic feelings, such as... do they want to be alone, do they gaze at each other when no one is looking and so on.
Hope this helps.
2007-03-25 22:53:59
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answer #8
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answered by eyes_of_iceblue 5
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She's 18. Your husband do not see her as a child! She do not need to be there with you and your husband.
2007-03-25 23:01:12
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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investigate.. if you cannot, then hire an investigator.... you must know this before it had gone too far and hurt you so deep... please do something to know the truth. but don't act like you are suspecting something... and don't nag them.. investigate, if something's going on (hope not) they won't tell it to you straight... so you just have to find it out for yourself... keep yourself ready and firm... don't lose yourself... i'm praying that everything would turn out fine for you....
2007-03-26 02:37:13
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answer #10
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answered by lorms 1
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