I've been going out with my boyfriend for about 2 years now and I want to come clean with it. I'm actually a shemale and I want to tell him coz I love him. Sometimes when I talk to him about gay people or shemales he gets really angry.
I have a feeling he's not going to take this very well when I come clean but I need to tell him this coz it's driving me crazy.
HOW HOW HOW ?
2007-03-25 19:37:16 · 18 answers · asked by Snow White 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
show him ur dic
2007-03-25 19:38:32 · answer #1 · answered by Friendly 2 · 5⤊ 4⤋
He probably knows but doesn't want to know which is why he gets angry when you skirt around the problem. Don't know how you tell him but you need to come clean with him sooner rather than later.
How do you think he'll react when you tell him. If you think he'll turn violent perhaps you should just break up with him and never tell him. If you want to try to hold on to him find a quiet semi private spot to tell him (safety) and then just explain it. Remeber you've been lying to him for a while so you're starting way way behind.
Luck
2007-03-26 11:13:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...your question is really showing you that you are on dead meat condition. But one thing to be proud of you is, i guess you really have the sense of a woman, that is why he could fall in love with you. If not, he would had known that you are fake. Sorry if i am a bit rough...but i am not angry to any of the sex status on the earth. I am open with it. Honestly to tell you, you should not have done this at the first place. You are putting yourself in troubles. At the beginning, you should have clarify to him, what i mean is both of you should be wise to understand each other before everything is too closed and it is difficult to solved now. In your kind of situation, i guess you should try to mention this to him in a great distance or maybe through a phone-called. If you think of other else ways such as e-mali or sms, maybe you can try but i think that is not a right choice. Calling is better i guess coz that shows your sincerity but at the same time you are protecting yourself from getting his punch on your face. Well, you know him very well on the gay or transgender matter you hve tried to raised up. It is good that you clarify this to himbefore marriage is on the planning. Sooner or later, everything will be revealed. It is only the matter of time. So tell him about this honestly. Try to clarify this when he is on his good mood not on his bad mood time. Approach to this matter slowly and don't be too direct about yourself first. Tell him not to angry but listen tou you. We want peace not war. If thing turns into worst, worst to worst is only a break up of both of you. However, this is not what we wanted to. It is gonna to be hurtful and miserable. Well at least you have done the right thing. For temporary it is going to be hurt, but sooner it will become a good thing for both of you. Take this as your challege. If he really love you, no matter who you are, he will still accept you. One thing that might probally coz him to angry while you try to mention about gay and etc. is he might have known about your status and he was trying to avoid this matter. If really is, he is soo much care about you. Hopefully this is what he has been doing. Anyway, take a deep breath before speak to him and be emotional stable. Don't be influenced by him and if it is everything is going to be even worst. I understand how deep is your love for him after 2 years. Just do your part and the other part leave it on him. Do not think too much as it going to make you sleepless, hurt and sad. Future is yet a long walk for us. Guys are still many out there. Develop a new love and don't repeat the same mistake again if you meet a new love. Anyhow, i wish you good luck and hope to listen form you again! Take care and see ya...
2007-03-26 03:10:49 · answer #3 · answered by Chris D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off, unless the relationship moved VERY slowly you should have told him sooner than 2 years in. That's a long time to not tell him something that big. Second DO IT SOME PLACE PUBLIC! Playing the tranny suprise trick has led to the deaths of far too many tg people. If he already hates the community there's a decent chance he could react violently.
2007-03-26 03:04:51 · answer #4 · answered by carora13 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, for your own sake, I wouldn't tell him. I would just leave. If he has that kind of attitude about it, you're better off without him. Besides, with those kinds of reactions to the subject, you may be putting yourself in danger just being with him in the first place. Be safe, honey. It's a nasty world out there.
Do yourself a favor and stop referring to yourself with the porn industry's "shemale" terminology. It's so degrading to transwomen, anyway.
2007-03-26 02:44:51 · answer #5 · answered by Danielle 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
There is no relationship without honesty, sorry but u have been living a lie. c u m clean with him now and chances r things will go bad. face it and move on. be up front with the next guy because darling there are plenty of guys who would love to have you.
2007-03-26 06:26:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is actually a secret fantasy of mine. nothing gets me hotter than a hot chic with something extra. as long as ur feminine. i don't bash ppl in public but i don't tell anyone that i like that kind of thing even though i've done it a few times. maybe he really likes it deep down but he is trying to act all hard and macho. i would be careful anyways. u can never be too safe.
2007-03-26 05:10:56 · answer #7 · answered by sfslowcivicvx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the Jerry Springer show to me, it's hard to swallow him not knowing in 2 years honey. But if you have to tell him with the hopes of keeping him I would write him a very heart felt letter and have him call you afterwards- from very far away dear. If he is willing to deal with it then great, if not your far enough away to stop off and get a restraining order.
Good luck hon.
2007-03-26 03:09:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you for you, then really gender should not matter, he should still see you as a female ( which I presume you want to be). Obviously because of the world we live in it will be a big shock to him, and he most likely will be embarassed to share this with his family and friends - which doesnt make it right, but its the way he might want to deal with it. Give him time, Im sure he will come around - Especially if he loves you as much as you love him. Good luck x
2007-03-26 02:46:56 · answer #9 · answered by chaser 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, you're obviously giving him something he wants!! (Hmmm, I heard guys are best for guys)... But I think you should just break up and never tell him. I am a lesbian and I'm telling you that you're being deceitful and you sure wouldn't want to hear him say he's really a woman.
2007-03-26 08:05:24 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, look for what you just said...i think that you should either just leave him, or... just leave him. for what you said it sounds like he is not going to take it very well. besides is you're own fault how could you wait 2 YEARS to tell him something of this sort? he could react very violently, look you got me worried now...if you really want to tell him...do it but in a public place and have proof with you so he'll know you're not joking.
luck! take care.
2007-03-26 06:00:10 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋