He is controlling, we tried to work our stuff out. He went to live with his parents (Dec 1 till Feb 28) so we could have time apart. He's been back almost a month but we are back to fighting! He puts me down, embarrasses me in public, we have no sex in 2 yrs (except pity sex in sept b4 he went to live w/ his parents. If he gave me $ I would have felt better!! We picked up right where we left off!! We did talk & agree on a lot of stuff I'm following what we agreed on but he is not. I realized that I'm no longer attracted to him & have told him this but he doesn't believe me. How do I convience him of this? He is still controlling & emotionally abusive. Even his son is afraid of him!! We still are in counseling but not getting ware. The only thing we agree on is that we can't change each other!! He is still trying!! I don't know what to do! I though we would be ok but we are not!! Still can't see my family only his! Won't give me any money He holds all money!!
2007-03-25 19:17:39 · 5 answers · asked by Missy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He has health problem 1 of which is panic attacks & generalized anxiety disorder. I had to be with him a lot because when he has a panic attack he walks & wonders around. Since I am with him 24/7 I know for a fact he is NOT cheating & also because of his attacks I can't work (not that he would allow me if I could!) Our church doesn't reconginize our marriage b/c we got married by the Justice of the Peace (my idea wanted to b married by 25 didn't care how) He promised me a church wedding when he got disability (hasn't happened yet now saying he never promised me anything) church wedding!He broke every promise he ever made me!!The med's he is on were only supposed to hinder him sexually for maybe 3 months been on med's over a yr & still nothing! I think he is using his med problems as an excuse!Yes?He likes moneu in his pocket but I'm not "allowed" to handle money because I'm a women & I only know how to spend not save! I only but what I need but I must have his permission 1st!!
2007-03-25 20:20:25 · update #1
Okay, either :
He's abusive (which from the description is where it's going), and you need to end this relationship.
or
You 2 not having sex in 2 years could have alot to do with it. A good marriage does have alot to do with sex, so consider that point.
From what you've said, he acts like he's abusive.
Keeping you from family
Not letting you have money (assuming you aren't just really bad with money)
Trying to demean you in public
Going back and forth with love and hate
If you aren't already, seek counseling from a pastor (not a therapist).
2007-03-25 19:25:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This may be a little harsh, but get a job.
If you have a job, you have your own money. Then he has no control over you.
And then if you dont love him anymore, get a divorce and move on with your life.
He is controlling because your letting yourself be controlled. And obviously he doesnt give you any money because he thinks your going to use it to leave him. Which yes is controlling.
So only answer is, Get a job.
2007-03-25 19:27:49 · answer #2 · answered by Zenthae 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No sex??? He is sleeping with someone else please don't thing he's not. It sounds like this marriage is OVER. Why make yourself or your family suffer any more. Just leave before he become not only emotionally abusive but physically abusive as well.
2007-03-25 19:45:48 · answer #3 · answered by loveangel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well uh.
first off.
no sex in two years is bad.
second, I think that your relationship
with him is going absolutely no where.
and you both would be better off if you
two werent together any longer.
I know, you would be happy,
nothing would be putting you down,
nothing holding you back.
good luck
2007-03-25 19:21:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call it quits and leave. It's over. The fat lady has sung.
2007-03-25 19:28:59 · answer #5 · answered by Grampa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋