18yr old daughter is taking drugs pills, pot and gone off the rails in 3 monthswhat to do?

Question

She started universty and is dropping out she has started a job and is dropping that as well.she doesnt communicte with her dad and me.Doesnt come home at all says she is ok and wounldnt take drugs but we know she is lying She is a great kid and has started a crazy spiral

Answer 1

To parent .. this child has lost her sense of security. Do more for her and stop persuading her taking drugs. Let her adult's sense come to her .. she will learn the hard way.

To the 18 y/o kid, A parent had provided such good education & great future for you. You SLAM your parents w/ such treatment taking drugs. I feel pity for you. Look back to thos rehad addictors. Are they enjoying their life / society after release. You're a smart lady. Remove those sick thoughts of drugs in your mind.. FOCUS to do well in career and give your extreme LOVE to your heart-broken parents. You will enjoy their smile & laughter while they r around. Your fate is DEFINETLY better than mine.

Care bear

Answer 2

I can relate to you on this.When I was 18 I made the same decisions.I came from a very good and supportive family.My parents didn't actually catch on until I was 18 because I started the drugs when I was 12.By this time It was too late.I was all ready hooked and had been put in jail for drugs.You really need to get a grip on this now while it's not too late.Call The number in the book for Alcoholics Anonymous.They are affiliated with NA......narcotics anonymous.Talk to them and let them know what's going on.They will make you feel better and they will get you and you're daughter the help she needs.There is always someone at this number.There is also crisis numbers in you're phone book that you can call that will help you out.Good Luck and God Bless you and watch over you're daughter.

Answer 3

Well, she's technically an adult. How much influence do you have on her? Probably very little. She needs to go into an in-patient 30-day drug rehabilitation center, but she would go unless she agrees (else it won't work anyway). Perhaps a planned intervention (with some of her best frioends there, plus you two, her boss & anyone else that she might trust.

If that doesn't work, I'm afraid you need to go toward the Tough Love end of the spectrum. Give her a hug, tell you how much you love her and kick her ass out of the house, with no monetary support. Tell her she is not welcome back until she has been clean and sober for at least 30 days and is working a recovery program.

Counseling is a less forceful answer, but it is also less effective & she still has to agree to it.

Answer 4

There are some great answers on here, so I don't know if my little story will help you at all or not, but here it is: I turned 18 and thought the world belonged to me, to start with I would leave and not call or come home on time. I would make excuses for all of my actions, soon I moved in with my boyfriend, started doing drugs and drinking a lot. I was smoking pot, I tried exstacy, and acid, I would mix pills and drinking, and was out of hand, so to speak. I thought my parents would never understand me...because in my head, I was going through some crazy mental sh*t. In my head I was alone, no one loved me, and I knew what was best for me. I pushed my parents further and further away from me, until the day my boyfriend beat me...then I called home for help. My dad came and got me, and I moved back in with mom and dad. That still did not stop the "insanity". I quickly got into another relationship, and even though I slowed up on the drugs and drinking, I again found myself in an abusive relationship, but this time I was married. I again, called home to mom and dad, and they helped me get a divorce and I lived with them, straighted up my life and realized what was important in life on my own. Ironically during this time, my mom happened to pass one of those church bulliten signs that read "A flower has to go through a lot of dirt before it blooms" Reading that kinda gave her hope that one day I would see the light. And I did. I still to this day enjoy an occasional party, but I also have turned into a very responsible young woman. I may still live with my parents, but I pay my own way, have met a very responsible, and very family oriented guy. It is very possible your daughter is just testing the waters as I did. Now if she is on something hard like cocaine or meth, then yes intervention is needed, but sometimes the best intervention is letting them learn lifes lessons on their own. I hope this helped.

Answer 5

While I wouldn't call the cops on a first time offense..everything else you listed is within reason and understanding. Kids seem to think now that everything is a democracy with their needs in place first.. ..it is not ..it is a dictatorship and you rule. She was 100% in the wrong and any action taken was out of concern as you being their parent. You are not her friend right now, she has taken the trust and responsibility you gave her and dismissed it.

Answer 6

There's not much you can do. I was in that same spot as a freshmen in highschool, but I just grew out of it and realized it wasn't worth it. Maybe she will realize this and maybe she won't, but you yelling at her and telling her not to take drugs will only push her further away....
There's no answer I can give you that will be the cure to her problems...try to help without seeming overbearing. Sometimes a seeming lack of parental care will frighten her into stopping. Sometimes kids do that stuff because someone's there to stop them...when nothing is limiting them, they often get scared of what they might do.

Answer 7

She WILL grow out of it. Unfortunately, she may reap the consequences before she realises how foolish she was. I was in a similar boat, I wasted my entire teenagehood on drugs, neglecting my family etc. Stupidest thing I could have done. Typical teenager, I laughed when my parents told me "school is important, drugs are bad", but if I could give advice to any child/teenager, it would be to LISTEN TO THEIR PARENTS.
You need to try show her how foolish and what a waste it really is to do what she is doing. I finally understand that my parents were not telling me things, trying to punish me for fun, they were doing it for a reason. You need to try show her this.

Answer 8

It depends what drugs she's doing. All kids go through a phase of experimenting. If its hard drugs like meth or coke and it seems to be an ongoing problem, then I would be concerned. Otherwise, she'll grow out of it.

Answer 9

you really don't know if she is taking drugs unless you gave her a test, so you hsould not accuse her of it, maybe there is something deeper going on with her and being she is a bit older maybe its time to be the friend and parent at the same time, take her to lunch and have a nice talk with her, tell her you love her and that you will not be upset that she can tell you anything and you want to help, thats what parents and friends do, that is what I would do as well

Answer 10

Well this seems like normal teenage rebellion. I understand your concerns, but I think the more you push her, the more she will rebel, I've had extreme experience in this area. Pretty much the same scenario, and it went on for 4 years, but all turned out well in the end, and is way more successful, than all friends, and family.