My husband say he loves me but sports seem to get in the way.If a husband loves you he will always put you first right?
2007-03-25 16:32:46 · 12 answers · asked by baby 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Your husband is suppose to put you first. Maybe you two shouldn't be together or try counseling. Sounds like you are not happy.
2007-03-25 16:37:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 5⤋
Are you asking should you always come before his hobbies, his job, his kids, his family, his personal well being and so forth, NO! Everyone needs an outlet and sports may be his. You can not possibly be the number one thing on his mind all the time. It is not healthy for him or you. He would just grow to resent you. Everyone needs their own space and to have their own priorities. My guess is you are a pretty high one and when it counts you probably always come first. Think about it this way. Don't you have your own hobbies that he doesn't get, but you still do them right? You need you time just like he needs his own time.
Your husband loves you, but my guess is it is not unconditional, but conditional. There is a big difference. The only person I love unconditionally is my baby. I think you would find this true with most people. If my b/f cheated on me I would leave him and eventually probably get over him for the most part. Or if my father abused my mother, I certainly wouldn't love him anymore. Do you understand what I mean.
Take care and don't worry so much about the little stuff.
2007-03-25 16:57:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
A husband shows his wife that he puts her first in many ways, but giving up every bit of his time or all of the things that he enjoys doing shouldn't be necessary.
It sounds from your questions like you are very unhappy in your marriage right now. I would suggest you find a councelor to talk to. Many towns/states have organizations that can help you find an affordable councelor, or try a church pastor.
If things are stressful right now between the two of you, your husband is probably confused as to how to relate to you. You probably feel more drawn to want to talk with him, and he probably feels more drawn to retreat to process his thoughts. I don't know your situation enough to give you specific advice, but I really hope you find someone to talk to about these issues.
Being married is not easy. Some people will not agree, but love is not an emotion, it's a choice you make every day to love the person you have married. And this is much easier to do if you can feel secure within yourself. Don't continue on being unhappy, please find someone to work this out with.
2007-03-25 16:48:18 · answer #3 · answered by average_american_superhero 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends how often sport is getting in the way. He can love you unconditionally but still be interested in other things. I know mine loves me unconditionally but he also loves sports. Sometimes he watches sports and i talk to him and he just nods simply because he isn't really listening to me... lol. Doesn't make him love me any less or mean he's not putting me first - it just means he's distracted by something and thats fine. I love him unconditionally but if there is a shoe sale he barely registers to me! lol.
If its really a problem talk to him about it - if its just the "normal" guy sport thing then i'd leave well enough alone.
2007-03-25 16:47:19 · answer #4 · answered by Smiley One 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should always come first, but you gotta realize that he is a person and he has interests and things and well...he needs to have a 'thing.' If sports is his thing then let him enjoy it infact try to maybe find a sport that you like as well and can have in common so you can watch a game or soemthing with him. Try to get him into whatever you like as well. Do that and maybe it will help with spending more time together. Good luck.
p.s - I know sports aren't that great, but just give something a chance...for him.
2007-03-25 16:42:08 · answer #5 · answered by Socially Awkward Penguin 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
O god, he's a freaking guy. They love sports They'll get distractred and on game day its all they think about, especially if they are with the boys. But im pretty sure ur more important. If it came down with it, he'd definately put you first. You should know that, being a married woman.
2007-03-25 16:41:49 · answer #6 · answered by your_veela_dream 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
The only way you'll get resolution is to talk to your husband and tell him how you feel. Use "I" statements ("I feel that sports are more important to you than me", for example) and don't attack him. It's not a question of love; it's a question of importance and ranking. However, this can and will affect your love. Good luck.
2007-03-25 16:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by veggie_kitty 1 · 1⤊ 3⤋
1. God
2. Wife
3. Family
4. Friends/Sports etc.
As you can see above, you and sports are on different levels.... so don't compare yourself with sports-... it's just part of what makes him whole.
2007-03-25 16:52:13 · answer #8 · answered by justmemimi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he can do both. he still loves you more, but sports always has and always will be a guy thing. i like sports so i be up there with him, but it's probably a guy thing.
2007-03-25 16:43:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
he better! seriously, you might want to talk to him. my husband is always watching his stuff on TV, but as soon as i came home, or need something, he pays attention to me or gets me something. i do the same for him as well. it's a 50/50 thing.
2007-03-25 16:41:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 5⤋