I just wanna know.I am married and not entirely happy.
2007-03-25 16:30:44 · 22 answers · asked by baby 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I've been married over 11 years, and I'm so glad I am. But...
about two - three years ago I started doubting my choice and even asked my husband to leave. He said no, that he was in this for better or worse and he wasn't going to leave me. It was an awful year - not because of him but because everything I had been struggling with.
I had so many unresolved anger issues from my past (even though I considered myself a very happy person). I even had anger isues with my husband - things I had never told him that upset and hurt me. I had been keeping it all in because that was all I had ever known to do.
It took a lot of courage, a lot of tears and about a year and a half to get through everything. I am so glad I did. Our marriage is so much better than it ever was before our "bad patch." The most interesting thing about it was that when we would tell other couples who had been married longer than us, they all said yes they understood because they had gone through something similar, and working through it together improved their marriage. It must be the best kept secret in marriage though, because no one told me about it before we had trouble.
If it helps, the thing that kept me there working on all these hard issues was knowing that if I left I would still have to work out the issues - I would just be working them out alone. If I didn't I would end up with the same problems with the next guy.
Good Luck.
2007-03-25 16:40:11 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I married when I was 18 and boy was it a mistake. I wasnt happy and even though I told everyone we was great together I knew it was a lie.. Dont fool yourself if your not happy then step back and examine the situation.. I am now married again, but this time to Mr. Right.. We have a beautifull little girl who just turned a year, and are expecting baby #2 in Oct.. So yes I am glad I got married the 2nd time around....
2007-03-25 23:35:04 · answer #2 · answered by auntietawnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am answering from my husbands account. But, to answer your question. I am not entirely happy since I got married. my husband is aware of this too. I think many men or even women stop trying after they get married, in my case, it's my husband. Everything is now all responsibility and children we do not date anymore. He does not take me out. Being married is really hard. Especially if you have had a lot of fun in your single days. You don't have that excitement anymore, all of the fireworks kinda disappear. You and your husband need to try to keep the spark alive. My husband and I, or should I say I, try to discuss this with my husband all of the time. It is definitely difficult to be married and happy, unless both people are working at it.
2007-03-25 23:44:03 · answer #3 · answered by timber creek 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
right now im not so i feel like you. There are good and bad days. Sometimes I cant imagine my life with and without him, love him and hate him. I want my way he wants his. We have been married for 11 years today actually and we have great memories together. We both want to be right and if anyone tries to say they have or know someone that has a perfect marriage they are being controlled. Because that would only be true if you didnt have a voice in the relationship. Remember your wedding day and how happy you were.
2007-03-25 23:40:32 · answer #4 · answered by stefani h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm happily married for almost 3 years. My husband is great and I love him more than I could ever express with words. We had a baby 8 months ago...the first few months were rough but its alot better now that he's helping out more with the baby. If you're not happy you need to let your spouse know and see how they feel. We've started communicating ALOT more since the baby and let me tell you IT HELPS! Maybe think about counseling for the two of you to work out what it would take for you to get happy with things again. Good Luck!
2007-03-25 23:37:18 · answer #5 · answered by GAjen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of newly weds feel blue. How long have you been married? A lot of people think life is going to be different after marriage and thats not true. Try talking to your husband about this. Maybe you two can try and get out more and find that spark again. Good luck.
2007-03-25 23:35:25 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very happy that I am married. Marriage like anything else in your life does require some work. My husband of 9 years and I still date. My daughters find it extremely funny when I dress up and get ready for a date with their dad. It helps to remind us that yes we are parents, but above that we are still people that have chosen to be together and love to do things "outside" of our home. Plus it's great to get away from the kids and the house work and simply be people in love once in a while.
2007-03-25 23:35:04 · answer #7 · answered by Мəəĸά 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am the happiest I've ever been. My husband & I have been close friends for the last 9 years & decided to get together 2 years ago & married a year ago. I think being friend for a long time first helps. Good Luck.
2007-03-25 23:38:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married at nineteen my hubby was eighteen. Best 10 years of my life so far, everyone told us we weren't going to last, but still in love and best friends. Maybe you could treat him like your best friend and talk to him about what the problem is and see if the two of you can fix the problem.
2007-03-25 23:42:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been married 12 years and I have never doubted my choice. We are very happy. I'm sorry you are in a rough patch. Have you shared your feelings with your husband?
2007-03-25 23:33:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋