I have been dating this guy for about 3 months now.. things have been great... I am in college.. and he lives about 30mins from me/is working/has own home.. etc... anyways.. things have been going great! I see him on the weekends and during breaks... He says that distance is nothing to him... seems to really care about our relationship...well.. the truth is.. he is sortive a spoiled brat.. never really had to work a day in his life... everytime I talk to him he's out having a great time with his friends/in the hot tub/driving his new car...while I sit and try to concentrate on my work... for what ever I get.. i'm going to have to work for...I just don't know where this is going.. I really care about him.. and he seems to care about me... should I continue to go with the flow/if I don't have time to chat with him during the day.. let it go... or if we don't talk for a day.. should I not get upset?.. i'm really confused right now.. what to do? Thanks for anyone who replies!
2007-03-25 13:19:46 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
His family has lots of money.. so that's why he doesn't have to work... and has a new home... think there is such a strain on me because i'm not in the same situation as him/wish I were.. but not.. sounds horrible that I feel that way... why/how can I change my mind set? I know that once I get out of college/I plan to go on to med/dent. school.. I will be able to do what I have always wanted to do/have a great partner.. should I just continue on with the relationship?
2007-03-25 13:20:10 · update #1
one of the best things is that his family owns multiple homes.. so has been great to travel a bit with him to the beach etc.. but that shouldn't be what keeps me with him... I love him.. just not sure if he feels the same...
2007-03-25 13:20:53 · update #2
Evaluate, for the long term. Just because his work ethic is different does not mean your relationship cannot work, but you have to figure out what you want in the long run, and how important this situation is to you.
One thing you could do is discuss your feeling with him. He may have no idea you are concerned about this, and he might care enough about you to change.
2007-03-25 13:31:09 · answer #1 · answered by ☮ wickey wow wow ♀♀ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is great that you have this relationship, however, it is never easy when one person has a work ethic and the other doesn't. Now, I know a lot of wealthy families who make sure that their kids still work, and they still hold financial responsibility, and that they only dip into the big pot o' gold when absolutely necessary. So, the fact that he's a rich kid should have little to do with his behavior. If you're in college I would lay down the law. Let him know you have these responsibilities and that you care about him to, and that he is a high priority, but there is also school and work, and that its healthy to have lives beyond your relationship. If it bothers you that he doesn't work, then either back out, it won't be good in the long run anyway, or simply realize that you love him and that 's what important. Go with the flow, but don't go farther then you are willing to go without losing your sanity.
2007-03-25 20:28:12 · answer #2 · answered by Waverly Pascale 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, I come from a wealthy background. I still value hard work. I've work very hard, even though I could mooch of my parents if I wanted to. I'm sure you aren't as concerned with the fact that he has money, rather than the fact that he is a lazy bum who doesn't even try to gain some independence.
You value hard work, and independence. In order to continue living his life he will continue to use his parents money. In the future, if he ever wanted to go out on his own, or if his parents kicked him out or whatever, he would have nothing to go back on.
He may be rich (have rich parents), and you may like him, but the truth is that he is a risky choice. He may end up having to depend on you, because he doesn't have work experience, and is high expense / high maintaintance. Also, I'd like to ask if your partner is going to college. That's a big sign of where his future ambition is.
If I were you I'd talk to him about what his plans are for the future, and if he plans to gain more independence. If he doesn't want to, dump his lazy bum a**. You don't want to feel like an unequal partner. That's exactly how trust is lost, and relationships fail. Don't waste time in something that won't turn out.
2007-03-25 20:54:39 · answer #3 · answered by chaseunchase 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship is fine and going well why worry about his finaces what you should be complaining about is if hes broke thats a good thing him and his family have money.If hes a little spoiled so what he treats you right thats what matter you got a guy with money that loves you get over it your blessed. It seems your a little jealous of him even though hes your bf.
2007-03-25 20:25:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋