everyone is trying to talk me into getting an abortion. im six weeks pregnant and I don't want to get an abortion.I'm 21 yrs. old and in college with a year left until I get my bachelor's degree. I'm a sales associate @ banana republic....which pays pretty good. My baby will be due in November. My boyfriend has a son already that he takes care of. I know for a fact he will take care of mine as well. But certain people in my life(not my parents because they dont know yet) are telling me not to have the baby because it will jeopardize my future. I've told them this is my child and I dont want to abort him or her. I feel as though I can finish everything I've started and have my baby. Im in the process of saving for my car. By May I should have it. After that I can pretty much focus on getting the things I need for my child. I know it will be hard but I know I can do it. also, I feel as though everyone's telling me this because I dont plan on marrying my childs father.
2007-03-25 11:25:02 · 19 answers · asked by Might Be a Mom 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I had an abortion in November and my bf hated me for it. My parents pressured me and I did it. I felt and still do feel horrible about it. Thats why there is no way in HELL i'm terminating this pregnancy. I want my baby
2007-03-25 11:38:26 · update #1
ok. really the only advice that you need to hear is that you shouldn't be listening to what other people are telling you to do. Its your body and its your life. I mean...i don't know if these people telling you are other family members or friends but...if its friends-they are temporary. I don't care how long you've been friends with that person or how long you have known each other...friends change all the time and before you know it, you will be just thinking about memories of them instead of spending time with them. If you want to keep this baby then keep it!!! Don't let someone else decide what YOUR going to do with your life. Especially at 21 years old. You have already started your life by going to college to begin with and you have a job that pays the bills and you are figuring out a way to save up for a car so i mean..you OBVIOUSLY have your life under control. If you don't want to marry the babys dad---psh. by all means. don't. haha My sister in law has 3 kids (1 boy and then 2 twin boys) from the same man but they aren't married. They have no plans on getting married. You don't have to be married to be in love or to have a life with someone. This is just all my opinion but i mean...i don't really see any other way of looking at it!
Good luck and congrats on the baby! Pregnancy is an exciting thing and i wouldn't pass it up for the world!
2007-03-25 11:34:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want the baby and are determined to put aside your own wants and needs for at least the next 18 years, then have the baby. Be prepared to give up much of what you've come to enjoy. Raising a child is hard work. Doing it alone will be even harder.
Having a baby now doesn't have to jeopardize your furture as long as you are willing to put the baby (and, once s/he grows, child) first. Your child deserves that much.
You can still get your degree. There are ways to work around your responsibilities as a parent.
Hang in there. Do what YOU feel is best.
Abortion is an option, sure. But so is adoption, if you decide you can't handle raising a child.
From what you've written, honestly, I think you'll be ok. You seem to have your head on straight.
Wishing you all the best.
2007-03-25 11:34:08 · answer #2 · answered by allaboutthewords 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see no reason having an abortion. Personally I think an abortion would get in the way of you life because you would see babies and wonder. Sometimes it hurts knowing that you will never see that child. These thoughts could hit you when you are all alone when studying for finals and rob you of your degree. If you are not ready but you don't want to get rid of the baby look in to private foster care. You could finish school and get established the whole while interacting with your child. It takes the pressure off you and gives couples wanting to foster a chance to. It is not like public foster care when you are a negligent mother and they take your child away. This is totally different. You choose who fosters your child. You say when the time is right to take him/her back. Foster care can be done through a lawyer. You also gain a family friend for the rest of your life. Good luck with what ever you choose.
2007-03-25 11:36:29 · answer #3 · answered by momof3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have the baby if that is what you want.. It is your child and everyone telling you that you shouldnt have him/her because it will jeopardize your future doesnt know what they are talking about.. It will make things a little harder then they are now, but hey even when the pregnancy is planned it still makes things harder sometimes.. If every person waited untill they was finished achieving all there goals no one would have any children.. You can go to school, work and care for a child all at the same time.. Plus you will have the help of the father.. Congratulations and Best of Luck.....
2007-03-25 11:33:26 · answer #4 · answered by auntietawnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't abort. If you are remotely thinking of it please do some research on the types of abortion and the risks to the mother. A large percentage of mothers who abort are aborting the only child they will ever carry, due the high risks associated with abortion. Just type in abortion in the search engine and do some research. Also, I am 38 and a full time student myself. I have 4 children and they have not in any way interfered with my goals for a career. You can finish your degree even with a baby, also I am sure your parents will help you with the child as well as your boyfriend. They will be extatic to have a grandchild to play with. Don't fret not marrying him just yet. The last thing you need to do is get married. That would interfere with your career worse than a baby. Good Luck. If you want to email me feel free. Maybe we can chat sometime.
2007-03-25 11:33:15 · answer #5 · answered by cathy f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do NOT abort if you do not feel it is the right thing to do. I feel very strongly about this "debate" and feel that even if you didn't want the child, someone DOES and would love to adopt. I know you DO want the child, so by all means do not terminate the pregnancy. I would think you would always wonder what could have been, and have a feeling of guilt looming over you. Do not listen to anyone else... you are an adult and very responsible, obviously, and able to make your OWN decisions. Good luck to you, and have a happy, healthy pregnancy!!!
2007-03-25 11:31:47 · answer #6 · answered by ☼ grateful ☼ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you already have your answer. YOU have to make the desion on your own, but keep in mind if everyone is so against your keeping your child then they may not be very supportive when you have it. You don't have to marry the father for him to be involved. You don't have to be married to be a parent (although I'm not for encouraging that, sorry). BUT a child changes every single aspect of your life. Everything ... from money, to time, to space, to just everything. If you are prepared for that then that is about as prepared anyone ever is before becoming a parent. Best Wishes to You!
2007-03-25 11:45:48 · answer #7 · answered by sebkls 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds to me like you are a lot more mature than a lot of young parents these days it is you're decision and tell them that they are not the ones who are going to take care of this kid so it is you're life and responsibility I'm happy to hear that you do not want to abort it is not a good choice I am pro life but I'm not judgemental that is Gods job you sound like you are stable enough to care for this baby and by six weeks along you have an idea of what you want !!
2007-03-25 11:34:33 · answer #8 · answered by tasha l 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont abort your child if you feel you can not raise this child put it up for adoption an open one so you know the parents who will love this child and you can still visit you sound like you are mature enough to rasie the little person tell your parents i know it is hard but they need to know they will offer help pray about this and give it some thought it is yours not your friends good luck and may god bless you
2007-03-25 11:32:06 · answer #9 · answered by kris b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well... you seem to have a great "gut" instinct. Don't abort. You werent raped... you seem to be with someone you care about. I, myself, believe in waiting til your married or atleast with the one you are getting married with... but... aborting a child... that is horrible and sad. You are at a great age to be a mother... and since you are almost through with school... that is perfect timing. I was pregnant going to college... it was fine... and hey... some of the professors are actually nicer to you...lol... they (women) know how pregnancy can be...lol...
Life is a beautiful... wonderful thing......... God let you have a child... please don't abort it.... and whomever is telling you to... they are hurtful and mean..... even if they do not seem that way. Only a selfish person who say these things. I know... people... even my sisters tried to get me to abort my first child... and I had no idea about pregnancy or children and I was younger and afraid and had nothing....... but .........I couldnot do it. I knew it was wrong. I kept my child... and he is great!!! (for most days anyway)
Children.. honestly........they may get on your nerves (sometimes... ) they may cost..........and make you unavailable to do somethings, sometimes.........but you know....... if no one is there for you............They ARE...... and they will LOVE you..........no matter what.........because you are Mommy!!!
Oh... and one more thing..........
I and my ex-husband had devorced... and I ended up getting remarried to the man I was meant for......... Well, he cannot have children........... I gave him something.....he could not have......... now... they are not, blood, his......... but he has been with them since they were pretty young.........and to him, they are his..........and he treats them as such...............If I had aborted............. I would be without child now..........because of this............so..........you never know what the future holds............and who is to say..........you will be blessed with another............this could be your only chance...........or one of many.............
Please pray to Jesus about it.... even if are not a christian ... he will hear you........and it will help your decision making........
I hope I helped...
you can email me anytime.
Thanks!
2007-03-25 12:05:49 · answer #10 · answered by Juls 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋