How do I keep a girl who's pregnant from giving up MY baby to a homosexual couple?

Question

I didn't wear a condom one time that I had a lapse in judgement and hooked up with another college student. Unfortunately she became pregnant. While I am against abortion because it's against Christ's teachings (even though she's not a Christian), we both decided that adoption was the best option.

However, I just found out that she plans to give up MY baby to a GAY COUPLE that she selected at the adoption agency! I don't want my child to be homosexual or think it's an acceptable lifestyle so what's the best way to avoid having this happen? I have talked to her and she doesn't seem to think it's a problem.

I wanted the parents to be Christians. Can I take her to court over this?

She already had me give up the parental rights though, after we decided on adoption BUT before she selected the gay couple...so is there any recourse?

Answer 1

to all of those people who told this dweeb to get a lawyer Listen up!!! He posted this same question in Law and Ethics. What the little sh*t did not tell you is that he signed away his parental rights via fax because he did not "feel" to go to the adoption agency with her. Jacka*s. He had no balls to stand up until he heard the couple was gay.
So I am going to tell you "gw bush_is awesome" this the same way I said it in Law and Ethics. Surprising you even knew to even post a question there considering you have no ethics at all.
You bigotry is telling. This is not about the baby this is about your tiny little ego.
You faxed in a copy of your signature giving up parental rights because you could not be bothered to take your sorry a*s to the adoption agency. You behaviour indicated that you wanted nothing to do with the process. So shut up!!! All you are is a sperm donor. Nothing more. Biology does not make a parent.
So now with all of your bluster, you want to talk about your parents' money as if that somehow imbues you with anything. Your parents money does not enhance your qualities anymore than sunlight can sweeten trash.
You chose to sleep with a girl outside of marriage, yet you trumpet Christian values. You are a hypocrite. You've trotted out "Christian Values" only as a convenience now.
Gay couples have shown that they can be more stable than some of your so called Christians who have exhibited higher divorce rates that secular people.
Being gay is not a contagious disease. No one can be raised to "turn" gay. If it was only one important thing that a gay household would teach a child is to be tolerant of others unlike you the so called "Christian"
You seemed to have forgotten one of Jesus' most important teachings " Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself" (Matthew 19:19/ Matthew 22:39). Your level of hatred of gays mirrors your own self hatred.

Answer 2

This is a tough one. OK first off, when you decided to let someone adopt your baby and gave up parental rights, that was it. The baby is no longer YOURS. Unfortunately for you, she is the one carrying the baby, so has just about every right to give it up to whoever she chooses, as long as they are a loving couple, it shouldn't matter the sexual preference. The only way out of this situation would be to talk her into keeping the baby and you both be the parents. That is a LOT of responsibility (I know, I've got 3 kids). And again, unfortunate for you, the mother gets most of the responsibility on her shoulders, so that would be mostly up to her.

I'm sure you will be much more careful in the future. I always said "No balloons, no party". My 3 kids come from marriage, btw. Use this as a learning experience. I would never be able to give any of my kids up, for any reason. Once you start a life, it's no longer about YOU, it's about THEM.

Good luck! ;)

Answer 3

Contact an attorney and try to get your parental rights back. Good Luck. Mothers back out on adoptions at the last minute so maybe the courts will give you a second chance In the future consider your sexual partners as a potential mother of your child. If you wouldn't want her reponsible for making decisions for your children then don't sleep with her. I wish you luck and the best of luck for your child. Even though you don't agree with the life style as long as they love your child there are a lot worse situations your child could be exposed to. Find out more about these people, if you can,and see if you can at least be involved in your child's up bringing if you can't get custody. Be honest about your feelings about their lifestyle without being rude to them, perhaps you will find you like them even though you don't approve of their lifestyle. Maybe you can even take your child to church on Sundays if you can arrange to have an active part in his or her life. Just don't insult the parents who are raising your child be respectful, because you would only hurt your child by trying to turn him or her away from the adoptive parents. (after all most of the time christianity frowns on premarital sex and that is what created your situation) Divorced parents often work together for the sake of their children even though they don't approve of the other parents lifestyle so keep this in mind as an option as well.

Answer 4

What make you think that because the parents are gay the child will be gay
and also they are not christian
maybe you should start thinking like a college man and show this girl that you have some brain
being gay does not make your child gay
and also Christianity have nothing to do with heterosexual
And I hope you can't not take her to court
instead try to get to know the couple that she wants to adopt the child
that is what a good christian will do

Answer 5

Hi, wow I am so sorry that you have found yourself in this situation. The best advice I can give you is to seek a lawyers advice and at lease try to get it where the two of you can chose the babies parents together. Have you look at Bethany.Org? This is a Christian adoption agency that my husband and i are working with . Perhaps you could get her to take a look at it. Just tell her a baby needs a mom and a dad thats why it takes both to make a child.

Answer 6

As much as I would like to argue with you about your reasoning, this is your baby and your decision. Your feelings should be repected, even if others disagree with them.
You dont have to take her to court. You just refuse to relinquish your rights to this couple. You have rights as a father, and in all 50 states, a child cannot be given up without the consent of both parents except through a court order. Still, the best approach would be to attend mediation with the baby's mother. Refusing to sign the papers will get you nowhere. I suggest you come up with a list of reasons you would prefer a different couple for the child that has absolutely nothing to do with any judgmental atitudes about their lifestyle. Using bigoted arguments will only make her more determined to fight you on the issue. Finally, if you have such strong opinion about the way your child should be raised, maybe you should reconsider the decision to place your child for adoption.
Oh and in response to your add-on about already giving up your rights...
all that you can do while pregnant is sign papers stating your intention to gie up your baby. The final relinquishment has to be signed after the birth of the child. So no, you have not fully terminated your rights yet. Although they may not want you to know this. Just remember though, that she does have a lot more invested in this than you do. Try to respect her feelings and wishes. "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."
And if you tried to sue the poor girl for attorneey's fees because you disagree with her choice of family for the baby she's carrying, you'd be an idiot.

Answer 7

I thought that christians were against using birth control, maybe only in some religons, if that is the case aren't you being a little hypocritical?
And even so, are you really that niave that you honestly believe that just because a childs parents are gay they will be too? Not only that, if you arent prepared to raise this child yourself then why should you get to be so judgemental about who is prepared to look after him or her? its different if they are bad people but just because they are gay? i dont understand you people at all, you'd think that with all the hate and misery in the world that love, no matter what shape or form it comes in, would be all that matters. but no there is always somebody like you who thinks they have the right to tell everyone else how to live. i am 30 weeks pregnant and im having a little boy, my brother is gay and if anything ever happened to me and my partner i would be privilaged for him to raise my son as his own and he and his partner would make the best parents possible.
I have no sympathy for you and if you cant even be bothered to go to the adoption agency with her then you shouldnt expect to be able to sit on your *** and call out your orders.
i hope she gives the baby to them i hope they are wonderful parents and i hope you choke on your prejudice.

Answer 8

hmmm...that sounds like a poor venture to be caught in! All i will propose is speaking extra together with her approximately what's occurring and telling her the way you sense with regard to the excellent venture. tell her that it no longer in basic terms makes you sense very annoyed yet tell her that it makes you disillusioned for the reason which you do no longer do the alternative. Or once you're all valuable and snuggled observing a action picture or laying in mattress mutually, very subtly do issues which you comprehend she likes. Or a minimum of, the combination of the stated recommendations somewhat helped my fiance loosen up and get decrease back interior the temper. He shows it extraordinary while are mutually and the newborn will flow lol that's humorous. with the help of ways, in case you get a loss of reaction...attempt no longer writing plenty! i'm bored so I certainly have the time to envision all of it, and that i'm no longer judgemental or something. as properly, that's not purely your final 9 weeks of your being pregnant, yet up till you're healed and in a position to have intercourse when you have your infant.

Answer 9

As the father you have to sign away your rights too for the adoption to be legal. I guess you could say you won't do this unless you have some say in the adoptive family. Then you should be going with her to the agency to help pick a family. Make sure you keep in contact with the mom and stay close when the baby arrives.

Answer 10

Of course you can take her to court. Its your baby, but be prepared to have a child. The only thing that I think you can go for is custody. You have a right to have the child. The court may order a DNA test. Its nice to hear that you two are being responsible and giving up the baby, not aborting it.

I have a question for you. In the bible it says that we should not pass judgement. That is Gods job. So why is it ok for you to judge these people just because of their sexual orientation? I dont know if I agree or disagree with homosexuality, but I do know that if my child was gay I would love it anyways. Our job is to love and accept everyone the way that God made them. Weather they are blind, physicaly handicaped or gay. Good Luck