My BFF is kind of bossy, and kinda judgemental. What should I do?

Answer 1

well if it gets out of hand confront her and say you have a problem. maybe she'll change or maybe youre gonna want another friend

Answer 2

Well if this person is a true bff then he or she shouldn't take it bad when u have a talk with him or her.When your with the person next time sit down n say can I talk to u about something without u getting mad at me?hopefully the person will say sure.Then u say how u feel n make sure u have example ready so the person can hear for them self what your talking about cuz if your claiming this then you'll need to remind the person of when n where he or she was being bossy.Let the person no that u want to always be bff but it's really hurting you being treated this way.If this person is a true friend then the person will apologize n try not to be that way towards u any longer.Don't get upset if the person gets mad at you for saying something cuz it could embarrass the person after you say what u have to say n that's why u need to say it in the calmest n sweetest way u can.Anyway hope it works out for u n make sure u talk to the person or it will build up n make u explode and say the wrong things or things u don't mean cuz your soooo upset.Bye 4 now n good luck.

Answer 3

i would talk to the BFF and let them know that you don't appreciate being bossed around (if the bossiness is being directed towards you). If the person is a genuine person who is worthy of your friendship, they will try to cool it, and see you as an equal, not as someone who needs to be controlled.

As for the judgmental characteristic, it would be interesting to know why this person is so judgmental. Maybe he/she had a really hard life with people constantly let him or her down. If that is the case, you should probably just see if he or she wants to talk about it, and be a friend, and try to help him or her through it. I mean, if you are a really good friend, that proves that not all people are losers and let you down :)

If none of this works, I would seriously consider finding myself a new BFF.

Answer 4

Honest communication is the answer here. One technique is "I feel" statements, such as "I feel hurt and angry (or whatever) when you (for example, tell me that my shirt is ugly), and I would appreciate it if you would (example, keep your comments positive)." Yes, I know it sounds a little awkward at first, but it does help a person feel more comfortable and it focuses on solutions, not blame. If talking about it several times doesn't seem to help, it is okay to tell her that you don't think that the friendship is working out and to end it. This type of behavior can easily get abusive, and it is best to stop it with honesty and respect all around.

Answer 5

Yeah, yeah, yeah! This is a post from 10 years ago but anyway, I write books with my BFF (she moved 9 hours away) and anytime I show my writing to her it's ALWAYS "Uuumm, *giggle* How do I put this? It's well..." I mean she's SUPER nice but it hurts! Maybe just confront her and if this doesn't work, She's NOT your friend!

Answer 6

when your friend is being bossy, i assume that you mean she tells you what to do (considering thats the definition and all). so if she asks you to get her something that she is capable of doing herself just casually say "your the one who wants it not me" and giggle a little to let her know that you dont mean harm, but her request was unreasonable. also if she tells you to do something that you think she could do or that you dont want to do just ask "why?" that way she will have to come up with a reason and sometimes it may just be "because i dont want to so yo do it!" if its that just say "well i dont want to do it just as much as you dont!" or something like that. Just dont let her boss you around, but dont yell at her everytime she tells you to do something, just be calm about it.

As for being judgmental, call her out casually. If she says "gosh that outfit is so ugly" or something (talking about someone else, not you) then just say like "aw thats not very nice" or something casual but dont be rude about it. Or if she says " (insert name here) seems really wierd" you could say "maybe if we get to know her she wont be like that" or if she says " (insert name here) is like mad today or something" you could respond with "well maybe shes just having a bad day!"

just whatever you do, dont be rude about it! stay casual and calm, just making comments when she says things that may not be the nicest or may be inappropriate to say about someone. i used to have a friend that was totally bossy and she has gotten much better because of this. I really hope this helps!

God Bless

Answer 7

Don't talk to him/her ever again. Screw them man, you have freedom. You don't need do damn boss telling you crap. I had a "friend" who would do that to me all the time. She would always embarass me infront of people and tell me what to do. I got sick of it, so I stopped talking. Then she became a raging lesbian who was obsessed with me and kept on calling me man, so I just blocked her calls, ignored her, and moved on. I'm only interested in beautiful people with beautiful souls now.

Answer 8

if shes bossy and judgemental to u dont be her freind

Answer 9

i agree with the first person you should get a new bff

Answer 10

it only matters what you think of yourself. but let her know you respect her opinion. you don't have to agree with it. and if you really don't like it, tell her just because she is your friend doesn't give her the right to judge you, period. and she can only boss you if you let her. don't feel bad, i am kinda the same way and need to take my own advice!!