It took her 30 years to leave her bad marriage and then we found one another and both divorced to be together. Still, after 3 yrs., she hasn't told hers sons (25 & 27) about me ....or how we met. It had driven me to the point of frustration that I unloaded on her. Now she says I'm an verbal abuser and selectively answers my phone call or emails!!! We used to travel all the time to see one another...now she doesn't want to do that...but when I did go to see her, we had a wonderful time...just like the old times..and says she still loves me. What can I do to make her move forward in a relationship. We had plans to move to Colorado, in fact, we have a hold on some property there, but since she's entered into this protective circle, I just can't get her to forgive and forget or look to the future. She still is worried about the sale of her house, losing her kid's love, her finances...everything and won't let me help. I'm frustrated. We've both see couselors seperately & together
2007-03-25 09:21:58 · 8 answers · asked by 650flyer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She was married to their dad for 30 years and now to have to tell her sons she is with someone else may not be the way she can handle it. A son can be really protective of a Mother, so give it time and don't push or you might push her to the door. It has to be hard on you but also her. Talk and make sure it's nothing else. Of course she is worried about the sale of her home, women tend to worry about things men would not give a second thought to. Why would she not want to say how you both met? A mother worries about her children more than she does herself, so give her some time and be there for her, not against her.
2007-03-25 09:30:36 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive and forget what??? Is she really just become scared of the reality that she will have to explain her actions and new relationship or did you do something that made her rethink what shes done? It sounds like she may not want to be in this relationship as much as she once did. If you can put up with this then keep on, but if not, it is time to move on. Good luck.
2007-03-25 16:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is so tough..She needs to tell her grown up sons that you are a part of her life. She is most likely ashamed of the way you two got together..But she needs to move on with you..Honestly she does not owe them an explanation of how you got together..She just needs to tell them about you..They are grown boys and if they don't take the fact that you are together well, then shame on them. They are hurting their mom and not wanting her to be truly happy. I think if she can not move on with you she is putting you on the back burner and as much as you love her you may need to move on. I think it would be appropriate for you to tell her all of this, and lay it out on the table. Then maybe you can move on toghther or apart. One way or another it needs to happen..Don't be negative about the sons. You don't want her to think you are trying to drive a wedge between them..But they are grown boys and their mom deserves to be happy:)
2007-03-25 16:33:30 · answer #3 · answered by jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her time and space. Maybe hold off on the property. This may be moving too fast for her. Have a chat.
2007-03-25 18:15:25 · answer #4 · answered by bahjij6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN its time to find someone sane, stop trying to save someone else ans save yourself
2007-03-25 16:27:03 · answer #5 · answered by MFREEBIRD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call up Jerry Springer and see if you can get booked on that show.
I swear, people wonder why their lives suck (shaking my head).
2007-03-25 16:29:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
how about moving on. and leaving her alone
2007-03-25 16:30:13 · answer #7 · answered by just hanging around 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
space, space , space man SSSPPACCCEE! ...let her breathe, "if you love someone let them go, and if they come back...?"
2007-03-25 16:50:48 · answer #8 · answered by fenderfan823 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋