Do you feel a woman who has never been married before should have a say in who she marries or just her father?

Question

I like the idea of a woman having atleast a little bit of say in who she marries. Maybe if her father could pick a few guys out for her to choose from or something like that. I know that it isn't always practical but I do think it is ideal if the woman is happy about the man she is marrying. What do you all think?

Answer 1

the woman should always have a say not the fateher \

Answer 2

Now here is where I wonder about you Sandstorm.

Anyone knows that the women of the harem arrange the marriages between themselves taking into full consideration the character of the young one to need a partner, either husband or wife. The ladies talk it over, and eventually come up with a few options.

At this point the young person is consulted and offered options. She has some say in this unless of course it is a political marriage as is done by the aristocracy even today. If the couple are agreed then the males get together and negotiate. But most of these decisions are handled by the women.

Arranging marriages is an ancient and honourable custom that has been presented in the west abysmally. The entire concept of "love" was hijacked by feminism and playboyism so things are pretty tough here in the West and marriages are failing, if they are even made at all!

Answer 3

well, it's 21st century, Women have a lot to say in who they should marry. Even in Islam, the women is asked for her opinion. Noone can force a woman to marry a man she doesn't want to be with. It's wrong. And unfortunately it is happening. So if it's happening to someone u know, you better speak up. I've heard of some muslem men who force their daughters to marry a certain man, just because (they know better than she does, as in they know what's best for her.) well, excuse me for saying this but it's rubbish. a woman has the right to accpet or refuse the man who proposes or asks for her hand in marriage.

Since i don't know what religion you are, got a feeling this might help if you're muslim:

"A girl came to the Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him) and informed him that her father had married her to her cousin against her wishes, whereupon the Prophet allowed her to exercise her choice. She then said, 'I am reconciled to what my father did but I wanted to make it known to women that fathers have no say in this matter'". [Ibn Majah] -- http://www.zawaj.com/articles/weddingmir.html

Answer 4

I would turn the tables on this one: "Men, please answer! Why do MOST married men feel that their wives will NEVER get tired of having sex with them..." Like that? I wonder...Let me tell you what very often goes on in the mind of "real ladies" (since you apparently don't know) Sex is but one hour out of 24 hours a day AT BEST. If you make it the focus of your love and devotion and life? I guarantee you will FAIL big time. You can only "spice" it up so much...The real glue that keeps men and women loving really does have to do with self-respect and good values - and respect for their mate and the MATURITY it takes to commit and be responsible instead of playing games on the asinine FACEBOOK website in lookiing for "flings" and deceiving others as you may well be - being deceived yourself. C'mon now, wise up and grow up...Kid stuff...GOOD marriages have integrity BECAUSE mature couples "get" they've committed, "get" that they don't always have "4th of July" fireworks with sex and further? Understand there is a far deeper commitment that goes on daily, monthly, yearly as they grow together as a couple and individually in their lives. Yeah. I thought you might not understand all this. What are you, 20 or 30 something? Yeah. I surmise if you don't understand what constitutes a solid relationship - a committed relationship - you'll never have one...No doubt about it. Grace

Answer 5

Generally, I think that both partners should have an equal say in whom they marry.

Arranged marriages were originally designed to control the flow of inheritance and broker alliances that were financially successful for both families. But marriage today is something different.

Why should her father be able to dictate her choices? That sounds a little too Medieval for my tastes.

Answer 6

That's what they do in foreign countries. Yeah I agree that some say in these type of settings is necessary. I mean, you don't want personalities to clash. Your father only knows the "daughter" side of you and because of that may choose someone youre not attracted to.

Answer 7

Duh!!
What kind of woman would allow her father to rule her life that way??????

Or is he going to marry the man he chooses for her???

Of course, she should make the choice!We're in the 21st century for God's sake!

Answer 8

hehehe thats wierd . Im 27 a never been married . Im really scared to get married without the advice from my father ( he died) .
I dont know if I'll ever feel confident in my own judgement

Answer 9

If it was up to my dad whom I love very much I would end up married to someone I went to school with but since we live inAmerica and women can choose I chose the love of my life and am very happy

Answer 10

I agree the woman should maybe have a little bit of a say.

Answer 11

It should be up to the individual as to who to marry. However that person should listen to any objective criticism about their future spouse. Despite todays culture, marriage parners shouldn't be looked upon as if they can just be taken back to Wal-Mart and exchanged for one that fits better.