We were high school sweethearts. I consider him my first love. He married this other girl after dating for a while. After having been married to her for about a year, he came to visit me. Well, we started to reminisce and we started seeing each other on the side. Eventually she found out. He says he was only there for his kids because he knew that if he left her, she wouldnt let him see the kids. (BTW, he turned out to be right)
Well, due to financial restraints, he has not been able to pay for an atty. He's been with me a long time and together we have had alot of financial hurdles. I somehow feel guilty of accusing him of not wanting the divorce when he's so wrapped up in paying OUR bills.
I'm at a point where if we're going to be together, he NEEDS to wrap up this segment is his life. My question is-----Would marriage somehow lessen the sin I I have committed by messing with a married man? She hasnt asked for a divorce either.
2007-03-25 07:14:41 · 9 answers · asked by FemFatale 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Both are in realtionship swith other people. She's even had a child by her bf. Are they able to get remarried to other people with God's blessing, since they both technically were cheated on?
2007-03-25 07:16:27 · update #1
WE LIVE TOGETHER .
He's not with her any longer!
2007-03-25 07:24:29 · update #2
Yikes this is awful. I dont want to put you on a guilt trip but this waas someones marriage that was destroyed here. I had a married man I was tempted to mess with but thank God I didnt because I believe that what you send out in this world you get back. if you ever do get married and this happens to YOU, you are really going to feel terrible. I sure hope that doesnt happen. If I were you I would walk away from the entire situation. If it is meant to be then maybe he will pop back into your life and be divorced and you can continue your life together. If it is meant to be, it will happen. Oddly enough, i think that if he wanted a divorce he would find anyway to get one. You are someones "second", and although i dont know you, you deserve to be someones first.
2007-03-25 07:28:31 · answer #1 · answered by Nursing4me2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused. Life is short and should be simple. If both your beau and his wife are seeing other folks--Why don't they get a simplified dissolution of marriage. Go onto your county clerk website and find the prices or call your local county offices to inquire about this. It's better if he's the one driving this, he should be the one searching out the info., it will definitely signify how much he really wants to close one chapter of his life and move onto the next. This type of divorce should not be costly. In Fla, is approx. $350--ck it out. Most importantly, you need to make some decisions about the relationship--8 years with a married man--Is this person worth 8yrs of your life? Is he meeting all of your desires and needs? Good Luck to you...
2007-03-25 07:29:19 · answer #2 · answered by bahjij6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I first started dating my spouse, he was married to another woman but separated for 6 years. And actually he lied to me and told me he was divorced already. It was pretty shitty.
Anyway, it made me feel horrible for ever because he never took care of it, even though we had financial problems to.
And I tell you once he got it done, it was like this refresh in our relationship. It has been SO much better, since hes been 100% mine. (I know he was before, but I mean he was married to another woman it never felt that way.)
I dont think him getting divorced, or you guys marrying would lesson your sin of messing around with a married man. Honestly, its been 8 years. It sounds like their relationship would of ended whether you were with him or not. Cheating is wrong, but in your case. Does it really matter anymore? You have the man you love, you shouldnt feel guilty about it anymore. Regardless if its a sin or not, divorce is a sin to. Its a different chapter of your life.
Get him to finish the divorce. And then close that chapter and work on your new happy life together :)
2007-03-25 07:23:18 · answer #3 · answered by Zenthae 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
After having a an affair with a married man and he's living with you...the only thing I could say is...its Really time for him to get a divorce. Frankly dear, I know how financies can get really bad in a relationship..but he should have gotten a divorce a long time ago.
2007-03-25 07:53:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That marriage died long ago. Paperwork is the only issue. You may want to both work on being able to obtain the resources through saving or some other means to finish the divorce. However, there is not moral issue in your case. That marriage was over long ago. Neither party is "cheating".
2007-03-25 07:28:54 · answer #5 · answered by Bill 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's married, and supposedly happy. decide for it. you will possibly desire to comprehend which you run the prospect of dropping her as a chum. in case you at the instant are not so close anymore in spite of the indisputable fact that, i might say that's properly worth it. in case you and this guy have thoughts for an further that have lasted this long, there's a superb opportunity that that's genuine. do no longer pass over out purely because of fact your (very married) pal is being jealous over a guy she dated virtually a decade in the past. in case you do no longer easily have faith that a relationship between the two considered one of you will possibly final, do no longer possibility it. interior the top, you will possibly desire to stay with your heart. it's going to lead you interior the stunning direction.
2016-10-20 10:26:51 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALL i want to say is..what goes around comes around...and i know uve heard that b4..
BUT i know for sure..its true..its happend to me..so be careful how u treat people!
2007-03-25 07:23:15 · answer #7 · answered by lisa baby... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
and i only get one gal,,,, I'm jealous of him even if its wrong
2007-03-25 07:28:16 · answer #8 · answered by scott in minnesota 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
D-O-O-M-E-D.
2007-03-25 08:16:48 · answer #9 · answered by adollorthreeninetyfive 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋