My wife's friend confided with me that my wife complained to her about wanting to not have to have a man in her life. My wife makes me feel this way almost every day with words or actions. I had asked her about this and she doesn't try to relieve my anxiety. I told her that she should have told me that before she said "I do". Some examples: (1) She will complain to me that I work too much overtime, but doesn't seem interested in spending time togther when I'm off. (2)She can sit home for days as she has a very flexable part time work schedule, but when there is an opportunity for us to be together is when she will have errands to run. (3)She likes to stay up late watching tv, then falls asleep on the sofa, never coming to bed. (4) fowards me emails that she gets from guys she met on match.com (we were seperated for almost two years), then tells me its no big deal.
2007-03-25 07:04:16 · 9 answers · asked by The Central Scrutinizer 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If my wife were behaving this way, I'd have to ask if she was at least in an emotional affair. She's showing a lot of the signs.
2007-03-25 07:31:01 · answer #1 · answered by Sultan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well If you put it all into perspective...she is giving you a lot of signs that she is unhappy. If you don't make a move, she will think you are soft or a push over. Stand up to her! I would be sure to let her know what your feeling of divorce are, if she doesn't try to spend some time & energy into you & the marrige, then why be toghether? I know that is a loaded question with all the bills & house, maybe kids or pets, etc. But you can't stay together for all that...it isn't healthy!
If you have had problems in the past, have you actually worked them out or did you sweep the troubles under the rug? A lumpy rug is NO GOOD for the 2 of you. Sometimes a marrige requires a counselour or a middle man to help the other hear your feelings insted of fighting or staying away from each other. You have some really good points to address with her about the couch & time...don't let that slip through the cracks. don't fight, just talk..NO Name calling, NO Bringing up 5 years ago...Just what's right now!
I know that I had an on & off relationship for over 12 years kinda like how you described yours & it was so tainted, I didn't have any desire to fix it so I moved on & eventually I found somebody that shares my goals & style. He was never able to move past his same behavior, some partners never can mature!
If you want to save it...it is gonna take work, but if she doesn't want to work at it....you are waiting for the imposssible. Sorry to say it but she has never reconnected with you as her lover! Be sure to consider all factors & if you truely love this person, do what ever it takews to fight for it, if you never see change, run like.....Good Luck to you!
2007-03-25 14:22:07 · answer #2 · answered by KB 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you tolerate being treated as you describe. I suggest couples counseling for the two of you...if that isn't an option or doesn't work then you need to decide if you are willing to settle for what you have (and not fuss about it) or make the necessary move to get away from an unsatisfactory situation...
This life is too short to spend it unhappy, especially when it's within our power to change that.
2007-03-25 14:08:34 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your wife has serious problems. Or the two of you go to a marriage counselor, or you ask for a divorce. It seems like neither of the two of you are happy. Sorry, but life sucks some times.
2007-03-25 14:09:04 · answer #4 · answered by Mari76 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OUCH...whats wrong with u dude!? Get the H E L L out of there..and dont look back..
she doesnt want you ...i dont know why she's there maybe money..family ...not sure..but if shes on match.com..shes looking for something else..
Have some self respect and pack up and move on!
2007-03-25 14:09:23 · answer #5 · answered by lisa baby... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is no longer interested in you. Doesn't matter what the reason is. Time to sit down and discuss the seperation plans. In court, this is called Mental Cruelty.
2007-03-25 14:09:33 · answer #6 · answered by sensible_man 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You, my dear man, are married to a very cruel, self-absorbed woman. What are you thinking? Truly you don't love this woman so much that you are willing to accept this behavior? You do have self-respect, no? Unless for some reason you can't bear to live without her, please do yourself the biggest favor you possibly can and remove yourself from this very unhealthy, volatile, "marriage" you have found yourself in. Seriously, this woman has a cruel streak we don't often see in people - at least they don't so blatently allow us to see it in them. Please, leave her and find a partner who will appreciate you - really, it's not that hard for someone to love you for what you do - not what you don't do. I wish you the best, but am very concerned.
2007-03-25 14:10:18 · answer #7 · answered by Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like what i went through with my now ex-wife. your best bet would be to divorce her while you have the chance.
2007-03-25 14:08:58 · answer #8 · answered by wrldzgr8stdad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you are with this woman why........................Get the hint and divorce her she obviously does not want to be with you..
2007-03-25 14:11:01 · answer #9 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋