Native ITALIAN speakers only please: I am mad at my man, need help?

Question

How do you say:

I hope you are having a fun-filled day seducing women. I hope in my next life I am a man; I am going to the same damn thing.

Thank you.

Answer 1

"Spero ti diverta andare a donne tutto il giorno. Spero di essere un uomo, nella mia prossima vita, potrò fare la stessa fottuta/dannatissima cosa" is an almost literal yet correct translation.
As for the first part, also: "Spero andare a donne riesca davvero a riempire le tue giornate" = "I hope seducing women does really manage to get you a filled day" "Riempire la giornata" = "Having always something to do", in that sentence "having fun" is clear by the context.
Or "Spero andare a donne tutto il giorno riesca davvero a farti sentire soddisfatto di te stesso (or appagato)" = "I hope spending all the day seducing women make you feel yourself really satisfied by the way you act (fulfilled)".

Okay, but now calm down, take a breath, and let your anger going over. It's true "Ne ferisce più la penna della spada", but don't allow anger kill your soul, please!

Answer 2

Spero che ti divertirai, andando a donne! Spero di essere un uomo nella mia prossima vita, e di poter fare la stessa maledettissima cosa che stai facendo tu.

But honestly: nahhh. don't bother. send him packing with all his girlfriends, and go get yourself a decent person. And don't wish to be a man!!!! goodness gracious!!! Remember this:

"God, I've been thinking.." says Eve one day.

"What's on your mind Eve?" says God.

"Well, I know that you created me and this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful creatures, but lately I've been feeling that maybe there's more to life."

"Go on..." says God.

"Sometimes I get a bit bored - I fancy a bit of fun. And I get a bit fed up with all the heaving lifting and carrying, and warding off the mammoths and sabre-toothed tigers, not to mention that bloody snake. This garden can be dangerous place."

"I see," says God, pausing for thought.

"Eve, I have a cunning plan," says God, "I shall create Man for you."

"Man?" asks Eve, "What is Man?"

"Man..." says God, "Is a flawed creature. He will have many weaknesses and disgusting habits. Man will lie, cheat and behave like an idiot - in fact mostly he'll be a complete pain in the backside. But on the plus side he'll be big and strong, and will be able to protect you, and hunt and kill things, which might be handy sometimes. He will tend to lose control of mind and body when aroused, but with a bit training can reach an acceptable standard in the bedroom department, if you know what I mean."

"Hmm," says Eve, "Seems like this Man idea might be worth a try, but tell me God, is there anything else I need to know?"

"Just this," says God, "Man comes with one condition... In keeping with his arrogant, deluded, self-important character, Man will naturally believe that he was made first, and frankly we all have better things to do than argue, so you must keep all this a secret between us, if that's okay with you. You know, woman to woman.."

Answer 3

Spero che stiate avendo donne seducenti divertimento-riempite di giorno. Spero nella mia vita che prossima sono un uomo; Sto andando alla stessa cosa maledetta.

Answer 4

Spero che stiate avendo donne seducenti divertimento-riempite di giorno. Spero nella mia vita che prossima sono un uomo; Sto andando alla stessa cosa maledetta.

Cheers.

Answer 5

mama mia!