i have an impossible 6 year old what can i do with her?

Question

i have a 6 year old step child, and she has an attiude from HELL. ( not listing, and always winning if she doesnt get her way. please please help.

Answer 1

Well if you think of her as the child from hell what do you think she is going to act like? Children respond to how they are treated. She can tell that you think of her this way so it is going to be the way she responds to you.
You have to remember when you married her daddy you took on the responsiblity of treating her like your own child which means talk to her, play with her, and most of all give her attention when she is not acting like a brat.
Maybe she acts this way because it is the only time that she gets attention.
It isn't easy for her to see her daddy with someone new, so she is going to act out because in her mind you shouldn't be there, her mommy should. She is too young to understand that some times things just don't work out and now you are the one that makes her daddy happy. You have to realize that having you around isn't a walk in the park for her either.
You just have to adjust.
Do things with her that only involve you two. Like go shopping,
or out to dinner and a movie.
I know that when my dad first married my step mother, I hated her! It wasn't until I got to spend time alone with her and learn that she really wanted me to like her that I finally started to be kind.
Just be there for her. And stop thinking of her as demon, because she just needs help with this transition.
Good luck!

Answer 2

First of all, to be a 6 year old and have to deal with stepparents and what that means about the loss of her natural family is really really horrible. The adults in her life failed her, no wonder she's no prize.

Check out the book - how to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk. The book is awesome - very practical steps for bringing children into a state of self-discipline.

Her life is hard enough - learn how to parent her in a loving, responsive, instructive way so that she doesn't suffer by remaining a jerk.

Answer 3

Well you said, step child right? Its a sticky situation, because allot of things could be mis-screwed by her & her dad..there is a thin line there...be careful..kids are very smart at even 6, to manipulate the parents...be firm, but not harsh...and show her its easier to get kindness, respect, & love with "honey" than with her "crap"!! Reward her when she is good, and disipline her when she's bad. You and your husband should be on the same page at all times...Ok? Taking her T.V., and outside playing, or other games with definitely get her attention. If she lays down and screams, kicks, well just step over her & go into another room. if she follows, go to another room. She will start to notice that her ways are not working. Good Luck, and remember,,,kids are a reflection of our raising!!!

Answer 4

Treat her good but be firm in the way you handle her, You have to retrain this child. Also If her Mother is still around than the best you can do is treat her as you would a neice. Never use force since this will never get her to see things your way.

Answer 5

I remember when my son was about 8, and started seeing his dad on weekends after a paternity test proved he was his. My son and the wife had a few go-arounds. They finally brought him home early one time, and the wife kept telling me that she had never seen a kid like that before in her life. I finally got tired of listening to it, and told her, "Neither have I! That doesn't sound like him at all! I think that the two of you have some kind of issues." After that, she tried harder to be his friend. I guess that they resented each other, he because he wanted his mom to be with his dad, and she because he wasn't her child. I told him to straighten up his act too. You two need to work it out between you. Befriending her may work best.

Answer 6

Act like you don't hear her. And if you are going in the store tell her before you go in that if she has an attitude that you both will leave and she will not go with you again. Leave her with the babysitter,or grandparent while you go by yourself, then after you do this then test it again, if no improvement, then I would call Nanny9-1-1.

Answer 7

just lay down the law and stick to it let her know that it is not ok to do this with me and if you do this is your consequence ..... then the hard part-- stick to it, she will get it eventually you may need to modify the consequences a little to suit her personality and such. i would also try talking to her about her attitude and letting her know why it is not good to act that way and how it affects those around her.

Answer 8

Bust her a$$. Always works with my kids. Bend her over your knee and give her a good firm open palm to the butt cheek. I *NEVER* let my kid backtalk me. My daughter is a yes maam, yes sir kind of kid. I was spanked as a child and I am a better person for it. I do not believe in beating or abuse. There is a difference in between abuse and firm disciplin. It's time to put the fear of god back in some of these unruly out of control children we have these days. If you let it continue, and she walks all over you, you only have yourself to blame for not taking back command.

Answer 9

This didn't happen over night. I'll bet that when she first started whining in order to get her to stop you gave in to her whines. Now she continues to whine because she was taught that whinning gets her what she wants. I suggest that you stop responding to her whines all together. Maybe by you ignreing them she will come to realize that they don't work any longer.

Answer 10

Stop trying to parent her.

Treat her kindly, but as if she's a friend's daughter. Try not to get overly emotional about her attitude; she's probably quite confused herself.