I know honesty is the best policy. This guy is so nice to me and he is a gentleman and everything. I like him as a friend but cant see myself romantically involved with him.I tried to tell him once before that something is missing, but he wouldnt give up. So i told myself maybe I will become attracted to him because of his personality, and how he treats me, but the attraction is not there still...
How do i tell him kindly how I feel ?
2007-03-24 17:48:59 · 15 answers · asked by Mx2 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
"i just don't like you in a romantic way. don't get me wrong, you have a wonderful personality and you truly are a gentleman, but i'm looking for someone else. i would like to remain friends though."
clearly, this is all off the top of my head...
2007-03-24 17:54:12 · answer #1 · answered by chris 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly how you feel. I swear every time I turn around there is a guy liking me but I don't like him the way he likes me. I end up liking the guy just as a friend tho. When he tries to pursue me I just tell him I am not ready for any kind of relationship or I tell him I dont want a relationship at all and friendship is what I need at the moment. My suggestion is tell him that a relationship is not what you are looking for right now, but friendship is. Tell him that the way you like him is just meant for friendship and nothing more adn that if you do truly feel this way, that if you two do get in a relationship and things don't work out you'll have ruined a friendship adn that you don't wanna take that risk. believe me if he truly cares about you he will understand... its the exact situation i'm goign through. my best-friends ex cares about me deeply adn is very attracted to me but i only feel friendship for him adn nothing more for him so i told him that i'm not lookin for a relationship but friendship and he actually did stop tryin to date me adn he still treats me like royalty tho but he is a great friend. I hope this helps you out
2007-03-25 01:08:30 · answer #2 · answered by Amada 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's weird how exact this is to my life right now! But my situation involves a guy described as you described as your "problem man" and his oh so sweet and good looking brother. Here is what I'm doing...Today I was with him and his brother along with some of their friends. I made sure that I was open to everyone there to make sure he didn't think that I was focused on him in any way. I talked to his sweet brother that I'm actually attracted to but made sure not to flirt with him. I spent the whole night having fun and not centering my attention on him even though I'm REALLY great friends with him. At the end of the night when he was in the car when I was getting dropped off at my house, he asked me if i was ok. i told him that i was fine. he of course asked if he had done something wrong and i just pointed out that i had told him that my feelings for him were nothing stronger than a great friendship. he went on describing how his brother made things so hard for him because he liked me but since i saw how much it hurt this nice guy who has liked me for way too long, i knew that i couldn't hurt such a sweet guy by dating his ohhh soooo attractive brother. sometimes life blows...just don't make yourself available to him without completely shutting him off. good luck...this is though, i know!
2007-03-25 00:59:53 · answer #3 · answered by JoAnn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down and tell him the truth! Do it personally not over the phone or anything. Also make sure your clear don't try to we soft but do let him down gently but dont crush him. Make sure he understands that you really enjoy being friends. If he seems bummed out thats normal but dont try to make him feel better by saying maybe it could work out or someday that'll leave you in the same mess. Just be kind but be clear that it wont work.
Good luck!!
2007-03-25 00:54:27 · answer #4 · answered by Htrain 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
on behalf of my gender, i would like to say thank you, first off! at least you are willing to say something and be honest. that shows you are. i HATE it when girls just blow me off until i go away. i try for so long, and eventually get hurt, because they just dont tell me how they feel. on the one hand it's like, i should get the point. on the other hand, i dont want to have any regrets from just giving up. however, if they put a stop to it, that saves my time, energy, and it also saves me from regret. anyways...now how do you tell him.
tell him you value his friendship. dont tell him he is unattractive (he will feel horrible). instead, just say, "i have been thinking about it, and i'm sorry, i dont like you in that way". keep it open ended. the reason could be just about anything. be kind, and let him know that you will still be there for him. thanks again, for being brave/honest.
2007-03-25 00:58:09 · answer #5 · answered by OrangeBunny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to have the right timing in telling him and tell him in a nice way make sure that he will not feel offended. I am sure the second time you tell him this he will beleive andunderstand you. He would feel it tho.
Don't mislead him and have that false hopes.Tell him that your better of as friends
2007-03-25 01:04:46 · answer #6 · answered by blue girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that previously when u went out with guys..u just knew it when it "clicked" with some of them(or one)..and it happens rarely with u.Im guessing he would ask whether it clicked with him or not..and u can politely say that...nope..wish there was a more subtle way..good luck
2007-03-25 00:55:46 · answer #7 · answered by Beautiful 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you just gotta tell him. Be nice about it, but breaking his heart is better than enabling him to live in a fantasy. He will also be able to move on and find someone who will return what he has to offer.
2007-03-25 00:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him kindly how you feel. And please don't suggest to remain just friends. There is no such a thing as friendship between a woman and a man.
2007-03-25 00:55:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"You're a great guy, and I'm sure you'd make a great boyfriend, but I can't force myself to be attracted to you. Like I said, it's not like you're a bad guy, or bad-looking. I just don't any chemistry."
2007-03-25 00:52:57 · answer #10 · answered by Mickey Mouse Spears 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋