On March 14 my oldest sister passed away. It was not expected although some of us had the feeling that things were not going to go well since she had a history of a stroke. As a Christian, it has been hard but I just wonder how other christians and non christians deal with their grief. I have also lost a child and my dad but this seems to be a different kind of lose. She crocheted crosses and gave them to people where she went and would do anything for anyone. She called me everyday to check on me but I just wonder how others deal with their grief.
2007-03-24 14:33:21 · 14 answers · asked by grandmabonnie 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
grandmab
I'm 71 years of age. You cannot began to know how many people that were in my life. Nor how many have died. Parents, siblings, wives, etc. Recently, 18 yr old grandson, born on my birthday, and given my middle name, a best friend,he was only 50. A friends two week old baby. My Daughters, boy friends father. Being a christian or non christian has nothing to do with how one gets past the worst. All the hundreds of people that I have know that died are indeed dead. I won't tell you which scriptures, but they are in Revelation and other New Testament scriptures, you need to search for them yourself. There is to be a resurrection of those that are dead ( sleeping ). I know that when that occurs I will see all those that have died prior to me. Knowing that helps. Nevertheless you can only survive the death of your dear sister by yourself. Kick some rocks, hit a tree with a bat, hell, throw some rocks. It's ok to tell God that you are upset that your sister is dead. Just be nice. I'm sure that you can think of many reasons to strive to live a happy life. I'm sure that you can think of reasons why your sister would want you to be happy. OK I lied, here is one. Rev 20:6 Blessed and holy is he that hath part in the first resurrection: on such the second death hath no power, but they shall be priests of God and of Christ, and shall reign with him a thousand years. I handle it by knowing that I will indeed see them after they are called from from their graves, etc. You hang in there young one .My youngest son is 14, he was 9 when his mother was killed in a car crash. He takes a hammer and destorys a toy car when he finds the need.
2007-03-24 15:15:33 · answer #1 · answered by popeye 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, my heart goes out to you! I lost my brother a few months ago to a drug overdose. No one in my family even knew he was using drugs. I understand how it is different with a sibling because you spent so many years of your lives together and have so many of the same memories. That's what I think about, that I never got the chance to reminisce with him about our growing up together. How I would love to be able to do that. We were very close as kids, more so than most brothers and sisters who are almost 6 years apart. All we had was each other with all of our family troubles.
It must be even harder for you because you spoke with her every day. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I am a Christian, and it sounds like your sister was very devout. I am sure she trusted in the Lord, so you know she is with Him now. That is how I deal with my grief. I remind myself that he's there waiting, but in the presence of God, where there is no suffering. I also think about things we did together, special times, fun times. That helps because I can remember him laughing...always laughing.
Just remember those times and don't think you won't see her again. You will.
2007-03-24 14:47:17 · answer #2 · answered by Nels 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a Christian I lean on the comfort that the Holy Spirit provides. It has been during some of the darkest times in my life that I have felt God's presence the most. I don't believe I would have made it through some of the losses I have suffered without the Lord.
2007-03-24 14:41:52 · answer #3 · answered by 1sweet lady 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My mother recently passed away. She was the best mother in the whole wide world. It hit me hard, because I couldn't attend the funeral. I was in another part of the world when it took place. That was the hardest part. I had to listen to the service via my cell phone. I grieved for a year and then I came to the reality that she has gone to a better place and I know that one day we will be together again. This is what gave me the most comfort, beside my work and my relationship with the Lord. But I allow myself to grieve until, I was contented.
2007-03-24 14:43:46 · answer #4 · answered by charmaine f 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There have been times when the Christian community was there for me and my family during times of grief, and times when no one seemed to care. Conversely, I've felt the presence of the Lord and the absence of the Lord. It boils down to this: some days are better than others. If it was fully explained I suppose that there would be no need for faith.
2007-03-24 14:49:05 · answer #5 · answered by Turnhog 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I'm sorry for your loss. I've lost a few people in my life, and even though I don't believe in an afterlife or anything like that, I do believe that people can be remembered. I just try to remember the good times I had with that person and how much they affected me and others during their lifetime. Talk to others and ask them how she positively affected them as it sounds like she was a truly good person. We tend to remember sadness and forget that the person made us happy. That being said, it's ok to feel sad and grieve for her, no matter how long it has been since she passed away.
2007-03-24 14:45:38 · answer #6 · answered by hmasson28 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your terrible loss. When I loose a loved one, I don't want comfort - I want to cry till I can't cry anymore, sleep in their bed, hold their picture, think of every good and happy time we had together.
The death of a loved one isn't MEANT to be made easier. It's a terrible loss.
I think too many people want to dull the pain but in doing so, they also dull the pleasure, and the joy of life.
Too many Christians waste their lives "waiting" for their reward and waste their chances to enjoy their loved ones "because we'll see them in heaven". Maybe you will, maybe you won't. All we really know is that we're alive now and we need to make the most of every moment so we have good memories to get us through our losses. It sounds like you did that.
Try sleeping in her bed, wearing her clothes or jewelry, thinking of all the good times you had with her and eventually you will feel better. You will always have that hole in your heart, but you still have your life and you can live it in honor of her.
Go outside, look at the sky, the flowers, the butterflies, listen to the birds singing and know that her spirit is there, with you.
2007-03-24 15:13:36 · answer #7 · answered by bandycat5 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When my parents died in a car accident 9 years ago I thought I would never be able to function again. Now I still miss them and I still cry about it occasionally I'm mostly ok. In another 20 years I expect it will only be scar tissue. You just have to ride it out. It takes a long time though.
2007-03-24 14:39:20 · answer #8 · answered by Andrea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hurt of course, at the time, but I am so very grateful that I got to have that person in my life, and for the time we had.
I have lost a son
2007-03-24 14:41:13 · answer #9 · answered by Sicily 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
2007-03-24 14:55:01 · answer #10 · answered by Jeanna S 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋