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ok i am a great mom! im giving, funny fun, we do crafts projects experiments cook n bake i teach him alot too im a work at home mom so i really have time 2 teach him. hes 3 knows letters shapes colors 2spell simple words do simple math how to write, animals and soooooo much more not to mention lil things n facts i teach him here n there..OK..
NOW I HAVE A REALLY CLOSE BOND WITH MY 3YR OLD SON IM 21 N WE R LIKE BUDDYS N IT BREAKS MY HEART SO MUCH BUT THIS IS LIKE THE 5th TIME HE'S TOLD ME THAT HE DOESNT LOVE ME! WE USUALLY SAY LOVE U TO EACH OTHER LIKE 10 TIMES A DAY BUT THE LAST 3 MONTHS HE'LL JUST RANDOMLY SAY "MOMMY I DONT LOVE U!" N I WANNA KNOW IS THIS NORMAL!!!? I DONT THINK IT IS AT ALL!! IVE SPOKE TO HIM ALOT ABOUT THIS WITH DIFFERENT APPROACHES BUT IT STILL OCCURS.... Y??

2007-03-24 13:56:38 · 17 answers · asked by SEXY CRML 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

im 21 i should be out havin fun partying gettin drunk being wild having fun but i NEVER do cuz i wanna stay with him and be there 4 him but its like a kick in the butt i really gave up alot to stay home and be with him n i love it n him alot!! but y is he displaying this behavior? he is really sooooo lucky! its like an abusive relationship i try n try just to please him n i get a kick in the butt!!!

2007-03-24 14:00:28 · update #1

17 answers

I think the fact you are telling your son (who you obviosly love to pieces) that you love him too much. You are making it to big of a deal, and most likley scaring him away. This is normal. The other possibility is that by saying "I dont love you" He is getting attention, weather it's positive or negitive kids still love attention! If you spend a lot of time with one another he is going to love attention right? your son does love you, but I think he is exploring emotions right now. How will mom react if i say this? How is it different to when I say "I love you". Try not to make a big deal about it, and say "I love you" a little less that 10 times a day. I know it's hard. Also remember, being three and all he is declaring his independance.

2007-03-24 14:06:40 · answer #1 · answered by crystal 2 · 0 1

take it as a badge of honor
what is going on is that good mom that you are he feels confident enough to tell you how he feels the problem is he only has so many words
keep up the "i love you"
but the thing is he may need play time on his own that doesn't mean daycare it means give him a chance to come to you . even at this age they know your mom not a buddy and they want some time to use you as a mom so let him use you . he wants to be a boy and come to mommy when hes ready
you've done a good job but nows the hard part growing with your kids
what is your job -just want to know

2007-03-24 15:38:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Just continue to be a good mom. You are doing just fine, play with him and teach him. Cut back on the 'I love you', use it only three or four times a day. You are already SHOWING him you love him. If it is said too much it loses its power. Don't demand the 'I love you' from him. You make it into a weapon rather than the nice thing it is. Just ignore it when he tells you he doesn't love you. Don't worry, he DOES love you. He is at the age that he learns words have power and is using them to see your reaction. Don't react. Trust yourself and trust him. As you show him love by caring for him, he will show you love in return. Just don't ask for the words.

2007-03-24 14:10:00 · answer #3 · answered by Els 1 · 0 1

This is very normal. Very heart breaking, but part of children learning to develop. I teach young children and they say things like this all the time. Just let your son know that it hurts your feelings and makes you very sad when he says things like, he doesn't love you. I would not punish him, but let him know that it does hurt. Eventually he will out grow this. Remember he is only 3. You sound like a wonderful mom, keep doing what you are doing.

2007-03-24 14:07:35 · answer #4 · answered by Abi 1 · 1 0

My little brother always told my mom that it is just a faze and honey i am 21 and i do not get the chance to go out because i am still in college i am on a scholorship for softball and i am going for nursing between studying softball and part time voulunteering i am busyier than ever i would love to go out and i do but very rarely my friends have to drag me away from my laptop to get me to go out honey treat yourself a little bit and don't end up like me go out every once in a while and have fun

2007-03-24 14:06:21 · answer #5 · answered by brandy 2 · 0 0

hey honey. its fine. sometimes kids have to be kids. I have 2 kids. my oldest is nine now and very independent and finding herself. i know that she dont mean it. she is just saying it out of her anger when i tell her no to something. like eating the whole cake in one sitting

I am also raising (with my husband) a child who is now 4. It took her a long time after we got her to just hug us. we are a very loving family and could not even cuddle her at nine months. I got her first hug when she was almost 2. she just started telling me love ya mama. Just be patient with him. he is at a stage that he is trying to assert himself as a self. and he wants to say that to get you to stand back and see him as such. even though you do. He sounds like quite an advanced little guy. Just let him be a kid and if it continues or gets worse. see if he talks to anybody like grandma etc. and see what they say he is saying about it.

that and try to get out at least once in awhile without the little guy. If you do too much for him(revolve your world around only him) and not enough for mom then you will begin to hate yourself more and maybe start smothering the little guy. If all else fails maybe day care for an hour while you get your hair done. sometimes adult conversation is nice. believe me i live in the country and the world revolves around the kids. when i go to the store i find it as a relief. its ok to pamper mom to.

2007-03-24 14:27:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

wow you sound exactly the same kind of parent as me! good on you! i'm 20 and my 18month son is my best friend in the world, he's only been saying love chu for about two months now though, but i've heard that yes they do it to get the reaction from you, and they don't actually mean it so don't take it to heart.. i know this advice has already been given but i just wanted to congratulate you on your awesome job, i've found it hard to explain to people exactly why i don't want to go out and party etc

2007-03-24 14:18:07 · answer #7 · answered by jarellsmom 2 · 0 0

It is normal that children try to push their parents buttons, but remember he doesn't quite have the understanding of what he is saying no matter how serious it sounds. But what you really should be worried about is that you are more concerned with the life of your peers that you are missing out on. Look at that little boy, that is better than any party you'll ever go to.

2007-03-24 14:22:50 · answer #8 · answered by erin c 3 · 1 1

He's just trying to get a reaction from you. If he's mad at you for something and says it, tell him,"Well, I wouldn't like me right now either, if I were you." And if he says it when nothing too significant is going on, try making him laugh, "Well, I LOOOVE you!" and tickle him. Try and take notice when he says it, too. Is it when you two AREN'T doing something together and he's trying to make you prove your love for him? At this age he should be spending time on his own, learning to rely on his own resources. There is such a thing as spending TOO much time together. :)

2007-03-24 14:07:45 · answer #9 · answered by LorenzoRed 2 · 0 0

don't worry it is totally normal. my son is also 3 and I am 23 we are very close as well. He tells me randomly he doesn't love me too. He does it to get a reaction out of me. I don't worry about it because in a little while he is giving me kisses and saying he does love me. you shouldn't worry unless he starts to act out along with it. He most likely likes to see your reaction. Try saying ok u don't have to love me but i love you.

2007-03-24 14:02:07 · answer #10 · answered by jesika011 2 · 2 0

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