I am getting married in 4 months, my fiance and I were thinking about providing some beer at the reception. I just found out a few minutes ago that my brother who has been in prison and is now at a half way house will be able to go to the wedding and reception. The thing is he is staying away from any drug, even alcohol( which I am totally for) He said that he will go to the ceremony but not the reception if their is alcohol there. He is not putting me on a guilt trip or giving me an ultimatum. He says he understands and supports whatever decision I make. He just needs to do what is best for him. I love my brother and want him there on our special day. I want to just make it an alcohol free event now but I also know that alot of people are going to want a little bit of alcohol there, including my fiances parents. We have already done a major change because of them. I know its my day and I should do what makes us happy, but either way I go I am going to upset someone.
2007-03-24 13:10:20 · 17 answers · asked by shelly63795 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I dont even drink beer but my fiance has an occasional drink, my family doesnt drink so the people who are going to be drinking are friends and his side of the family.
2007-03-24 13:16:44 · update #1
Weigh the options with your fiance. Don't be afraid to make the statement that your brothers sobriety is what is more important to you and that you two have decided that the way to begin your marriage is by supporting his effort. It is a good cause and if others really need a drink to enjoy your special day, how sad is that? (you can always get no alcohol champagne for traditional toasting and it is just as festive)
2007-03-24 13:21:25 · answer #1 · answered by Safira 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's your wedding and your reception and if you choose to have an alcohol free event, it's your right. Family is important too. Maybe if you explain your reasons for choosing not to include alcohol everyone will understand...and if they don't, shame on them, not you. I say kudos to you for wanting your brother there and wanting to help him stay away from drugs. Your guests can always have a drink after they leave if they want. Do what you feel is right in your heart. It'd be a shame to look back with regret because you weren't able to share your entire big day with your sibling because others wanted to drink.
2007-03-24 20:25:14 · answer #2 · answered by okwriting 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you don't need alcohol at the reception. people that get upset that there's no alcohol shoudl re-think why they're coming to the wedding. If they feel they must have a drink they can go afterwards. people are allowed to drink any day they want and don't need to rely on you to get a sip. so don't have the alcohol and have your brother attend! he's more important than drinks. if the fiance's parents get upset - explain that you'd rather have your brother than beer at the reception. also offer to take them out another time for drinks. they should understand!
ps. i'm not having alchol at my wedding, if it makes you feel better!?!
GodBless
2007-03-25 02:24:38 · answer #3 · answered by Ashley 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have a lot of choices. One of which is not to serve any liquor until an hour after dinner. You can also have a dry wedding....thats very popular these days because of the new driving/drinking laws. whatever you decide, keep it simple. Dont get into big explanations. You and your fiance decide and just let both moms know----they will know if any particular family member needs to know ahead of time, most dont. Remember your guests really just want to see you ecstatically happy and have a good meal.....anything and everything else is just a bonus...think of the last wedding you went to ..... seriously, the details dont matter to anyone but you and your fiance, maybe your mom. Dont sweat this...do whatever will make your day hassle free.... God Bless and Congratulations
2007-03-25 01:12:16 · answer #4 · answered by Sweetserenity 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have the first hour or so of your reception be dry so he can enjoy the food and cake. Then about an hour into it open the bar. Have lunch with him and explain the plan. On wedding day tell him your goodbyes and thank yous and that will be his hint to know its time to leave. Then all parties involved will be happy. Also nobody will know that he is a recovering alcoholic since that might be embarrassing to him.
2007-03-24 22:20:04 · answer #5 · answered by katie d 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'd suggest you keep it alcohol free as long as you and you fiancee are comfortable with that. Remember that this event is for you two, not the parents. You might want to make a small exception with the champagne toast (with sparkling cider for the non-drinkers), but there's nothing wrong with a booze-free reception; I've been to a couple and they're fine. Good luck and congratulations!
2007-03-24 20:20:46 · answer #6 · answered by dukefenton 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Im an American living in Jordan. I have been to so many weddings here and none have alcohol. If you can only see how the people are so happy and having so much fun. The weddings here in my opinion are much more beautiful than the states. So as you see you dont need alcohol to make yourself happy. As long as you have a high self esteem you know how to make fun and happiness yourself.
2007-03-24 20:24:04 · answer #7 · answered by racey dweik 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well. the way I see it, you could have an alcohol free reception, and later that night you and your drinking friends and family can go out to a bar to drink. that way you have what YOU want (your brother at your reception) and family and friends can drink on your wedding night.
2007-03-25 09:41:59 · answer #8 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nothing at all wrong with having a wedding with beer or other drinks. I've actually never been to a wedding with drinking.
2007-03-25 17:26:08 · answer #9 · answered by layla983 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what my bf cousin did have a no alcoholic reception at the wedding and have a party at your house for the people who do drink..everyone got what they wanted and you wont have to drink and drive.. and if someone get to drunk then make them a pallet on the floor
2007-03-24 21:28:29 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋