My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 3 months. We go to different colleges an hour away from eachother, but we get together every other weekend. A lot of the time we get along well, we love eachother and really enjoy being together. But then sometimes he starts acting weird and mad for no reason. Like, he'll just leave and not talk to me, and gives me one-word answers when I ask him something. He does this on the phone sometimes too, so then I don't know what to say to him, and he gets even more upset if I say I'm gonna hang up and we should talk later. Also when he's mad or been drinking he sends me stupid texts that say things like "I'm gonna go f*** chicks and drink" or "what would you do if I cheated on you?" Then when I write back that I'd be upset he's like "but don't you love me?" and then it goes back and forth like that. His reasoning for all this stuff is that sometimes he just likes to fight, but he doesn't mean any of what he says...I just don't know what to do??
2007-03-24 12:37:32 · 21 answers · asked by Stephanie M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
College is a crazy time for many people. My boyfriend and i have been together over 3 years, the first two were spent apart. He is in the Marines and was over seas. We had trust issues with me being in college and him being away, but we worked it out and gained each others trust. If you both really love each other and want to be together you can make it work. But by the sounds of his text messages, he doesn't respect you like you should. Just dont put more into the relationship than he does. It sounds like he is immature and may be doing something behind your back, which is why he gets all defensive and angry.
2007-03-24 12:41:28 · answer #1 · answered by Julz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Are you sure he doesn't mean what he says? I mean when people drink, the real side comes out of them and they actually say what they feel and what they think. This usually happens. That is wrong of him to drink and act all crazy like that and tell you hurtful things. And even ask you stupid questions like that. What are his intentions? It sounds fishy. Sadly, I have to say that I think he's cheating on you. But then I could be wrong, but I doubt it. You need to talk to him and talk about your plans with him and what you guys are planning to do in the future. Try seeing if he really loves you and if he would stop talking to you and forget about you. If you guys don't work out for a long time, then I think you should break up with him because I feel like he doesn't love you. He's just messing with you. Try finding the right person who won't say such things and the one who really suits you. The one who you think truly loves you too. Don't stick with him. He doesn't seem good.
2007-03-24 12:47:30 · answer #2 · answered by Dark Angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if I were you I would have a serious talk with him, especially about drinking. So, if he doesn't mean anything he says, why does he say it? And if he keeps doing that sort of thing, the best advice would be to make the move and break up with him. If he that you'd be upset if he cheated on you, then he shouldn't. But since he said "but don't you love me?" doesn't make too much sense. So, I'd say sorry hun, Break up is the key here.
2007-03-24 12:43:10 · answer #3 · answered by animegirl769z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do your own thing and then, after college, see if it works out. People under stress, like school, act different. Given an opportunity, both of you can finish up and then, if it works it works, if not, no harm no foul.
Far better to get some breathing room now, than force the issue and be miserable until you get a divorce. Life is too short to be miserable, give it a chance and don't force the issue.
2007-03-24 12:43:04 · answer #4 · answered by bigmikejones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know.... it sounds like he's playing mind games of sorts with you. Also he sounds like he's sort of controlling in a way that might not make you aware of it.
I think for now the best thing might be to end the relationship. It sounds horrible I'm sure, but you don't want to get trapped in an unhealthy relationship.
2007-03-24 12:42:08 · answer #5 · answered by DressageGal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard one. i my advice is to sit him down and telling him everything that u just said here and how it makes you feel, i know i've been there and it worked for me, if he does't change or feels that you are wrong then, i would brake it off before it gets toooo serious. I hope it works out for the best girl. keep strong you deserve the best not this
2007-03-24 12:45:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey he is working on your self-esteem he wants you to feel down but did you know that you can have so much more without him if he wants to cheat and he is telling you that he will cheat honey he already has. get checked for stds and move on he thinks the grass is greener on the other side but speaking from experience its not you dont miss a good thing untill its gone.
2007-03-24 12:47:40 · answer #7 · answered by c_lynn_73 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like an immature little turd. Dump him and get someone who enjoys your company and doesn't play silly stupid games. Nice guys are out there waiting for a girl like you.
2007-03-24 12:59:07 · answer #8 · answered by Jim V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your in colleges 1 hr away, break up, have you own fun. If its meant to be you will reconnect after college. Sounds like he wants to end it, but doesn't have the balls to do it himself. So his is doing stuff to just piss you off and hopes that you end it.
2007-03-24 12:44:15 · answer #9 · answered by PizzZak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is already cheating on you. The anger part is probably him being mad at himself........feeling guilty and finding it easier to just be mad at you. His drunk messages are probably true. Find someone that won't hurt you.
2007-03-24 12:50:53 · answer #10 · answered by eigna728 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋