I am a 24 yo malaysian with an irish (caucasian) gf. i do love her to bits and so does she. we plan to get married next year. my gf's family are cool with the plan but the problem is my parents, sisters and soon on not agreeing me to marry her and want me to marry a lady within my race (austronesian). i have reasoned with them that there is no chances for me to find any malaysian/indonesian/philipinos ladies since i was born and grew up in Europe. but it falls on dear ears. if you were on my shoes what would you do guys ? should i listen to my family or just listen to my heart ? serious answer please..?
2007-03-24 12:17:32 · 23 answers · asked by strutter 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
listen to your heart, afterall its your life not theres
2007-03-24 12:21:08 · answer #1 · answered by ♥fluffykins_69♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Without a doubt, you need to marry the person you love. Try not getting sucked in to a conversation with your family about this. The discussion/argument will not last nearly as long if you don't continue trying to change their minds. You may just have to face the truth, you will not agree on this. It is hard to keep quiet, but in the end, you will benefit. If you really want to throw them off, you could say "I know you love me and want what's best for me." You know if this person is right for you, listen to your heart.
2007-03-24 19:28:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have to ask then you are not ready yet to make a wise choice. Compatibility is an important ingredient in any union. You grew up in Europe but your parents did not. I think you are inclined to following your Heart. So what's the Problem. You have answered the question.
2007-03-24 19:25:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your heart only. Otherwise you will never be happy. Once the deed is done they will all come round and accept her no doubt. I married an Irish lassie too and there not so bad, if not a little fistie!
2007-03-24 19:22:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should listen to your heart... I know that you love your family but it isn't their decision on who you want to spend the rest of your life with. If your girlfriend is the one for you and she makes you happy and you guys want to get married then do it!!! you family loves you and eventually they will accept your decision because they don't want to lose you. Good luck and I wish you all the best!!!!
2007-03-24 19:23:48 · answer #5 · answered by CuriousStacy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a long term relationship with a Chinese man from Hong Kong. We had a child together. He planned to settle in Ireland permanently; but first decided to make a trip home to advise his family that his life from then on was with me and our child.
His family went crazy; he is an only son, with three sisters and a widowed mother. He simply gave in to them. He never came back, despite my letters and phone calls. his mother refused to open the door to me when I went all the way to Hong Kong to meet with him and possibly salvage something from the situation.
i was left to bring up my son totally alone. my life was simple devastated. My son never knew his father, yet he looks like him in every way.
Listen to your heart, follow your dream. Have the courage to make the big step; I believe if your family love you, they will adjust.
And good luck.
2007-03-24 19:38:58 · answer #6 · answered by marie m 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi i am a filipino and married to a british, i have similar situition with you, that there was a disagreement between me and my family in the since that it's too impossible...anyway to cut the chase, i would say listen to your heart, your parents are not the one who will live with your gf, but it's you. i know they are just bit insecured because they are not living here, and besides the culture as well of both countries...whatever their reasons wil be respected but they have to respect your own descision as well...just talk to them and explain what are there concerns...good luck!
2007-03-24 19:32:32 · answer #7 · answered by Simply_Me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide what means the most to you. A woman you love or the family you love.
Where would you live? How would your children be raised? In what culture and what religion?
There's a lot to think about. Good luck.
2007-03-24 19:22:49 · answer #8 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This applies to anyone who's family objects the person you want to marry. The person you wish to marry should be the person you plan on spending the rest of your life with. Your family are not. They are just part of it.
If you're really serious about her. Go for it. Goodluck.
2007-03-24 19:24:16 · answer #9 · answered by Scorpio 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should go ahead and do what it is that you want to do - it is your life after all. I think in the end your family will come around you know, well they will have no choice anyway! Do what feels right for you and good luck.
2007-03-24 20:25:40 · answer #10 · answered by shell 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your heart.. You can't force yourself to love someone. Love is a rare thing that occurs so seize the opportunity- no one can or should tell you who to love. And love is essential for a good and healthy marriage.
2007-03-24 19:24:48 · answer #11 · answered by n1ke_g1rl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋