Parents arguing ?

Question

Do you think it has an adverse effect on children when they see their parents arguing ? Or do you think that it helps children learn how to compromise and that relationships have to be worked at ?

A recent study shows that children who see parent arguing on a regular basis under perform academically. Do you agree ?

Answer 1

There's a big difference between solving differences of opinion and arguing.

Differences of opinion are normal, everyday occurrences. Kids need to learn how to deal with these.

Arguments however normally include nastiness, bitterness, shouting, slurrs, and otherwise childish behaviour.

Of course, differences of opinion on the children shouldn't be discussed in front of them.

Answer 2

I agree, parents who argue daily have both an unhealthy marriage and increase the chance of rage getting the best of one partner and adventually ending up in domestic violence. I believe children who see this learn a negative behavior that is carried on from one generation to another. It's time we stop domestic violence and work to strengthen the American Family Unit. If you need to argue do so in the absents of the children and or seek counseling if it's regular or your marriage will be doom for failure. Many couples can talk without screaming and jumping up and down like young children. Children repeat what they see. So think about them before you act.

Answer 3

No I don't agree to be honest. Unfortunately, my husband I and do and have argued in front of the kids, easier said than done not to sometimes.....
I have always explained that we were in the wrong and that people do argue and have disagreements and usually matters are resolved or agree to disagree.
Both my children do well in school and have had no problems with them achieving academically (up to now!) Fingers crossed it stays that way.

Answer 4

I agree.
Seeing parents argue will only stress children out. It puts a worry on their mind which will effect the way they deal with other aspects of their lives.

Answer 5

I do agree with the study. Parents arguments are frightening to children, their parents are their security and safety. I also believe that there are far better ways to resolve conflicts than through arguments, and there are certainly more mature behaviors than arguing in front of children.

Answer 6

my children rarely witness my husband and i arguing and if it came to a head that they were seeing it all the time we wouldn't be together. children have enough going on in their lives without having to deal with their parents problems affecting them it's better to be two good parents apart than two bad parents together . children need to feel loved and secure at home if they live in a home where arguing goes on all the time its not going to feel very secure for them, my nephew is a mess because of his parents constant arguing and hes only two can only imagine what hes going to be like whens hes older at school if they stay together

Answer 7

I think parents arguing is BAD. My parent s argued all my life and hell I under achieved ! I have problems withing relatioships too, as I will do almost anything to avoid confrontation of any kind, which forms bad feelings and ultimaltey kills relationships.

Answer 8

I do agree with you a bit , i wouldn't go out room though if i was arguing with my husband and my son was there ,we don't argue all the time but i wont hide it from him , yes there are certain thing that we wont say in front of him like swearing ( think he knows them already ) i don't wrap him in cotton wool he needs to learn and be able to stand up for himself when he is older,
My friend was hear the other day with her little girl who is 2 , my son was running around like kids do hes only 3 but was going a bit mad so i told him to stop he didn't so i raised my voice a little bit , he still carried on so i raised it a bit more which made him stop before he hurt himself anyway my friend picked her child up and started to cuddle her and was saying to the little girl, michaela was just shouting at jaykay but it ok she kept repeating it over and over and rubbing the child's face to comfort her , for me there was no need for that and i asked her does she argue in front of her child she said no and goes out the room ,for me that child Will grow up looking behind her shoulder and scared of her own shadow and wont be able to defend herself when needed , but that's my opinion .

Answer 9

I believe that if you have to argue you should not involve your children there are other ways to teach compromising and stuff like that

Answer 10

I think its bad for anyone to see two people arguing.

On the positive side, once you have worked out the issues, I think it is very important for the child to see how two adults resolve their issue: Intelligently through discussion. So, once you have resolved the issue, allow the child to see how two adults talk to each other to resolve an issue. Children don't just learn from their own mistakes: They also learn from how adults confront, accept, and resolve their own mistakes.