I'm a single parent of an tween-ager, who's an only child, a good student and a avid reader. I consider her a good child, but I need help with dealing with the uprising attitude of talking back, deep sighing and the looks that express "this woman has lost her mind", that I'm beginning to experience. I know she's going through the harmonal changes physically and emotionally. I need advice on how to deal with this without reacting on whim! I'm mommy and will not give up the role just to be her "friend". FYI: Her dad is very active in her life also.
2007-03-24 06:02:09 · 8 answers · asked by summerchile64 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You will need to learn the fine art of "ignoring" her until she treats you with respect and as the parent. This is very much normal with teenagers today and all have the same problem. Teenagers are trying to exercise new found powers and trying to find their boundaries, just how far can they push you to get what they want. We grew up with the knowledge that if we did what the kids pull today wed get clobbered real good but since society has deemed child punishment as child abuse, parents have lost a vital control tool over their kids. A good old fashioned a.s whopping never hurt us growing up learning to respect our elders. Kids will never know this now. So the best way is to ignore them until they learn some respect and courtesy for mom and dad or theyll never get their way til they do. Once you give in to their ways, they know they got your number and its really going to be hard to regain control so the sooner you learn to ignore them the better your household will be. Good luck
2007-03-24 06:27:28 · answer #1 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to call her on it. Any talking back or bad additudes need to be corrected. Say you make a decision and she talks back, tee her that's you're the mother in the house,and she has to listen to you. Teenagers try to push to see how far they can go with talking back,additudes etc.. Ages 12-17 will be tough ! Sudden change will happen and it's crazy but,you have to cope. Your the mother,and what you say goes ! Let her know your not one of her little friends at school...don't go crazy and yell (yelling never works) just stop her in her tracks. Be her mama,don't her friend. Hopes this works !
2014-07-15 00:06:29 · answer #2 · answered by Autre 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm going through that phase also and my mom just puts up with it and a lot of times I feel extremely bad about it but it seems like I can't stop. I sound exactly like your daughter. The best I can say is, love her and punish her when it is needed. My mom always tells me if I talk back one more tie I'm grounded. It works. :)
2007-03-24 14:26:17 · answer #3 · answered by Miss.Hilton 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What my mom does is just threaten me to a spanking good thing I never said a word after every threat. But if you don't believe in that then give her a talk about respect but don't approach her as a daughter approach her as a young lady learning etiquiette. But in my views I just think that she's trying to be like every other girl at her school.
2007-03-24 13:15:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if she acts like she wants you to stop being her mom and start being her friend, she still needs stability. I read that a good way to deal with t(w)eenagers is to speak to them like adults, but to be aware that they're not. Sometimes they will have lapses in logic and emotional outbursts that you wouldn't expect from an adult. The writer recommended being gentle on them when they have mood changes and outbursts (they're probably secretly embarrassed about them too), but not to compromise on existing rules or allow yourself to be walked over.
Think I read that in a child-psych book I found in my MOM's bookshelf - scary to think of myself being analysed. Still, it worked for me. I always felt like she respected me, but I had to keep on treating her with respect.
12-15 is the roughest on the parents. After that reason starts returning and she might even ask your advice...
2007-03-24 13:54:35 · answer #5 · answered by Marie Antoinette 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should make her feel like she can tell you anything, if you try hard not to be friendlike, like my mom, She won't tell you anything. If she get really bad just talk to her without yelling. punish her if she is still this way even when you act understanding. Make her feel comfortable around you. Belive me, if you this, she will not behave this way, shell come to you w/ her problems. Something is bugging her when she acts like this.
2007-03-24 13:50:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to show her that you're there for her when she needs you and that you will not put up with her attitudes.
2007-03-24 13:57:29 · answer #7 · answered by Aaron 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best thing you can do is be consistent with your rules and expectations of your child (this is hard to do... )...
and love her!
all the best!
2007-03-24 13:14:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋