I don't like having my life completely revolved around other people. I like to come and go as I please. My girlfriend, on the other hand, is one that likes to know where I am, what I'm doing, and when I'll be home, and if she goes more than 1-2 hours without seeing me (work excluded), I have to put up a fight with her to "let me" go out, whether it's with friends or to the bar where I'm being paid learning to do KJing, or even to visit with my parents. I understand the consideration aspect of telling her when I'll be home. My problem is I seem to need her "approval" without a huge blowout fight and having her call me irresponsible and inconsiderate. Am I the bad guy here because I believe as a 21-year-old I shouldn't have to ASK my girlfriend if I can make plans that don't involve her or should she let up and loosen the leash?
And no, I've never done anything to make her not trust me. I'm 100% faithful. All I want is a little "me" time, not spending every second together.
2007-03-24 04:17:02 · 11 answers · asked by Jay M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you shouldn't need her permission. just tell her that you are going somewhere and that you will be home at this time and if she has any questions to call you. and if she ends up calling you a million time just tell her to relax and that you aren't doing anything. or ask her if you gave her a reason not to trust you or if that is just the way she is. If i was you i would tell her that you need some "me" time and that you don't constantly want to be surrounded by her.
2007-03-24 04:23:10 · answer #1 · answered by Joanna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, She is overprotective and deep down inside has this insecurity that you are going to do something to betray her trust. Maybe in the past she use to have trust issues. That might be why she is doing this.
The only thing you can really do is sit down and talk to her and tell her that she is being a little overbearing. You need some space and not that you want to break up or anything you just feel that you shouldn't have to tell her everything you do everyday... and make sure she knows that you are not hiding anything. Tell her you lover her if you do... You also need to tell her you want to be an individual... She needs her time and you need your time.
2007-03-24 04:30:18 · answer #2 · answered by Ashley 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suppose I have to ask whether you like being in a relationship? Perhaps you shouldn't be living together at all. I think when you move in that its a perfectly reasonable thing to expect your partner to want to be with you. My husband and I don't do much without each other which is why we hooked up in the first place. However, now and again we go off and see friends on our own but it is rare and takes a bit of negotiating. I don't expect any me time as its us now.
2007-03-24 11:01:54 · answer #3 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's immature and insecure. She obviously doesn't trust men in general. so , I don't think it's just you. Your both too young to having to be that ridget about where and what your doing when not with each other. Either find a understanding between you two, or break it off. Because sooner or later you will be accused of doing something weather you did or didn't doesn't matter , the fight will happen! Good luck!
2007-03-24 04:29:00 · answer #4 · answered by MARK S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the hanging out in bars part is understandable. You like trolling bars? As for when you go to your parents, job, etc? That's plain needy. Maybe if you grew up and stopped hanging out in bars with losers you could find a good woman instead of a needy one?
2007-03-24 04:29:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same here my g/f is the same way. What I do is talk to her and tell her I need time for myself and yes you know it she gets mad and she claims im cheating on her. However, I tell her that if i was cheating on her why would I ever tell her I need time for myself.
I suggest you talk to her and tell her in a nicely matter what you think. If she starts getting mad dont stop the conversation continue untill she understands that you mean business.
2007-03-24 04:22:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i think she has been hurt b4 and so she dosent trust guys. So that would make her a little controlling cuz she really likes u and dosent want u 2 hurt her. Trust me ive been there.
2007-03-24 04:21:02 · answer #7 · answered by Kelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's a "clingy" person. You're not. You'll need to discuss this with her, maybe over and over and over again.
This might be one of those "impasse" things that you'll never solve. You may have to ask yourself if you can live your whole life this way, or not.
2007-03-24 04:23:25 · answer #8 · answered by kiwi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all explain that you want to do stuff by yourself
then if she still gets upset you may have 2 break up w/ her...its not fair that she gets mad whenever your not around her
2007-03-24 04:30:40 · answer #9 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn`t "ask". But you should be considerate. Suggest that she go with her friends out and maybe meet up later or something to that effect.
m~
2007-03-24 04:20:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋