If you're still drunk dialing your ex a year later...?

Question

screaming at him and crying... is it necessary to call and apologize, or can I just cut my losses and run?

The break-up was fine, mutual, but since we've broken up he's been doing so well, and I've kinda become a drunken mess... so I guess I get angry in my one my alcohol fueled evenings. I kinda remember telling him that I hoped he died last night....Instinct tells me I should just leave him alone and pretend it didn't happen.

just to be clearer. I'm 26, live in New York City, am completing a Master's, work in a non-profit for children advocacy and when I'm not doing all these things, I like to meet my friends for a few drinks and dance. Every once in a while I drink too much, it happens to the best of us.
I'm not qualifying, I'm just clearing up that I'm not an alcoholic. So you can stop with the judgemental replies. They're not helping.

I'm not hoping to get back with him, actually, I'm moving out of the country in May for a new job opportunity... also, yes, to start over again. My question is really whether I should make an apology, and if so in what form.

okay Greg, I'll keep that in mind coming from someone who apparently has the time to be a "top contributer".

Note to self: Internet junky thinks I have a drinking problem and no self-control.

okay, i need to learn how to act respectfully and grow up. once again, coming from someone who doesn't know me from Adam and has somehow managed to accuse me of being crazy multiple times in an hour.

Answer 1

Ahh..the drunken rage. I get into these all the time and then start thinking about things that really wouldn't bother me if I weren't drinking.

I do think it is right on all levels to apologize in some way. He may not want to hear your voice right now, but an I'm sorry card can't hurt.

Answer 2

Stop drinking, and stop finding excuses to be a loony-toon. Time to grow up, take control of your life, and make it a better life. When you are back in control of yourself and have done things to improve yourself, you'll be in a position to meet somebody better.

You're making excuses for your lack of self-control. I don't care if parts of your life are together: you're an emotional mess who has a drinking problem. Somebody had to tell you.

I don't drunk-dial my exes. I have self-control. It's not as if I was always capable of such self-control. But I changed, and I'm not looking back. You have to be your own master and stop making excuses for bad behavior.

When you learn to act respectfully, maintain some self-control, and stop making excuses and attacking people who try to tell it to you straight (because it is time to move on, and nobody likes a drunken call from a crazy ex), you'll be on the road to good mental health.

Answer 3

He is gone dear. Whoever 'he' was has moved on and become someone else. Habits and ways you may have liked have changed. Things you would have grown with, have grown away.

So have you I suspect.

No one can fill the hole they leave in our hearts. Everyone has a different 'shape' so soften you heart a little and learn to squeeze someone else in.

Make a start and let some deserving 'other' help cool the anger and make you happy.

Good luck :)

Answer 4

Honey listen to me you need to tell him your sorry. Trust me I know what your gloing through I was there a couple months ago. But it is better to say I am sorry and not do it again. I know your angery because he is moving on and doing great but you need to do the same for yourself. Sitting around drinking isn't gonna make you feel better. Why not shbow him you can do better without him and get sober and do what anyone does, get a NEW man!! This way he might get jealous about it and he might not. Honey if he can move on so can you. Just put the beer and all taht down and do what you need to!!
Kimimila

Answer 5

follow your instinct. he would probably prefer it that way.